i need a fucking dog.

Tuesday was like the most epic day ever because it was Cinco de Mayo AND Taco Tuesday. I couldn’t even contain my excitement and let Brady know in the morning that we were getting chips, salsa, tacos, burritos, chimichangas and margaritas for dinner.

Directly after work, I met Kendra in Lakeview to look at a condo for her and John. The place was super cute with wooden beams, an updated kitchen with chic black cabinetry, three bedrooms, two bathrooms and a ton of vintage charm. And honestly, it wasn’t a ton more than the budget I established with my banker lady when I thought I was going to buy a condo.

“I’m going to send pictures to John,” Kendra said and started taking pictures on her iPhone. “He really needs a spot to put his pool table.”

I suddenly felt an a pang of jealously. How fucking cute are they, already making plans for their furniture and home together (although I’m kind of confused as to why he still has a pool table in 2015). I want to get married and buy a condo and pick out really expensive decor. I feel like being in a relationship only makes me want that more. I had to resist the urge to text Brady and ask if it was okay if I started looking for condos for us.

I mentioned to Kendra our dinner plans and she kind of invited herself and John. So Brady came and picked us up and we met John at the restaurant. I ordered a margarita before we even sat down. I was kind of annoyed about our double date at first, but then we started having a lot of fun. Plus, maybe if Brady sees how happy and engaged they are he will propose to me.

After three margs, I asked Brady if we could get a dog. I don’t know if this is my version of baby fever, but I have puppy fever. I need a fucking dog.

“Why?” Brady asked.

“Because they’re so cute and sweet. I never had a dog growing up so I feel like I missed out. It’ll be like our little baby,” I explained to him.

“They’re a lot of work, you know. Especially a puppy.” he said all matter-of-factly.

I pouted. “I know, but I don’t mind. I’ll do a ton of research so I can be the best doggie mommy ever. And it can stay with you so you’re not so lonely after Chris leaves.”

“We will have to look into it,” Brady said. “I work a lot and it wouldn’t be fair for a dog to be in the house all day like that.”

“But I get off at a decent time and since I have a key now I can help with the outdoor duties!” I was impressing myself with how well I was making this all come together.

The final verdict was: “We will see.” I hated when my parents used to say that to me when I was a child and I hated it even more when Brady said it.

We went back to Brady’s and I used his laptop to shop while he showered (using my own credit card, thanks). I ended up ordering four pairs of shoes and two bracelets so nothing too crazy.

I worked really hard on Wednesday and stayed at the office until almost 9:00 PM. Matt texted me during the day. He said, “How’s my favorite girl doing?”

I responded, “Favorite girl?” I don’t even know why I said anything back to him.

“You missed Miami. Would’ve loved having you there.”

I rolled my eyes and didn’t say anything back. He texted me again later saying, “Can I take you to dinner this weekend?”

“I have plans with my boyfriend,” I said and he didn’t reply.

The weather was awesome on Thursday and since I worked so hard Wednesday, I decided to leave a little early to enjoy the day. I got the bright idea of surprising Brady at work. I haven’t done that in so long! I got there and asked the desk girl to page him while secretly hoping that Jessica or Maddie or one of his work mistresses showed their face. But they didn’t.

“Hiiiiiiiii,” I said in my super high pitched annoying voice when Brady approached.

“Hey. What are you doing here?” he asked.

Is it just me or is that super rude? Like I’m here to visit you obviously. I actually said that and added, “Can you sneak out for a bit? It’s so nice out!!”

Brady seemed to think about it for a moment before agreeing to it. Yay. I didn’t have anything planned so we walked down the block a bit and talked about our days. We stumbled upon a gelato shop and of course, I insisted we go in. We ended up taking our gelato to the park and sitting on a bench right in the sun. I busied myself watching all the dogs and adorable children (I actually do not like children at all, but these kids were so well behaved and cute. I don’t know what the fuck is happening to me).

I’m not sure how, but we started talking about threesomes. Brady asked if I’ve ever had one.

“Ummmm, not exactly,” I said awkwardly. This probably wasn’t particularly a story Brady wanted to hear, but remind me to share it with y’all later. “Would you want to do that?”

“I think every guy has a fantasy of being in bed with two women,” he answered.

“Oh my God, really?” My eyes widened. While I think Brady and my’s sex life is awesome, it’s not like we are that daring or try new things that often. We like what we like.

He shrugged and didn’t say anything.

“So if I brought another girl over, you would seriously have sex with both of us?” I asked.

“I mean, I’m not going to say no…”

“Brady!” I exclaimed.

“I’m just kidding.” He paused. “Unless you wanted to.”

I licked on my gelato and considered it. As you can imagine, I’m not really interested in sharing. Especially sharing an actual bae who I love. But honestly, I don’t know why, but I’m super curious to watch Brady be intimate with another girl. Is that weird? But maybe we could try it. I know the perfect person!

I slid my dress up so I could take advantage of the sun and get a little color on my legs. We sat there and watched the parents and children and animals. I fell in love with this Maltese named Bella who ran over to me like she knew me. She belonged to an elderly couple who told me that she likes to meet new people, eat human food and nap a lot during the day. It sounded like we had a lot in common so we were instant friends. She wouldn’t leave my sight and even climbed in my lap and napped in the sun for a few minutes.

I turned to Brady and discreetly said, “Can I keep her?”

Brady laughed nervously because he knew I was serious and would offer the couple my entire designer shoe collection for Bella. She was perfect and I almost cried when Brady said he needed to get back to work. I thought about giving Bella’s owners my number in case they ever need a baby sitter. But that would be weird?

As we were walking back, we passed a man and a woman, probably not much older than us. She was pushing a (super chic) stroller and the guy was carrying a little baby that couldn’t have been more than a couple of months old. She had on what looked like it could have been a working mom outfit (relaxed jeans, striped top and sensible flats) and he looked like he had probably just gotten off work. Or maybe she even surprised him at work and made him take a break like I did. And they had a little furry dog with them. I got this weird feeling of envy in my chest. They looked so happy and married and content.

I feel like I’m going through this phase of wanting to settle down since Brady and I are so good right now. Is this what growing up feels like? I don’t know if I like it or not.

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15 thoughts on “i need a fucking dog.

  1. Melpod says:

    This was such a cute post. You and Brady seem to be doing so great! As for the threesome the fact that you’re willing to go there, maybe you’re not as jealous of a person as I thought. Good for you! I on the other hand brought it up to my boyfriend knowing that I’d die if he said he wanted to, but I played it off as something I might be interested in… He told me that was nasty and that he could never share me. As cheesy as it sounds that’s when I knew I was going to marry him.
    Anywho I love hearing about you and Brady falling deeper in love!

  2. Jenna says:

    You’ve grown up so much since last year! Seriously though, I can’t imagine you saying this a while back and am so proud of you… Brady has definitely had a good influence on you. As always I love your blog and I hope you find the best dog soon 🙂
    By the way I have a Maltese mix and she’s the best dog I could ask for

  3. M says:

    I got a dog when I was just out of college, and it really helped settle me down and taught me to put someone else before myself, because it was totally reliant on me. She was several months old and already house broken, so that was awesome, but still a puppy. As dumb as it may sound, I think it got me ready to settle down with my (now) husband. She’s still the most awesome freaking dog ever and I’m pretty sure she’s my soul mate! 🙂 I think you getting a dog isn’t that crazy!

  4. Luita says:

    To me sex is not just about sex, it’s about the connection & love between the two so I would never be able to bring an extra into it.
    Brady is being so much better lately, leaving work early, taking time to go to lunch with your dad and taking a break in the middle of the afternoon…. I’m so impressed with him. I love it! The break must’ve been a good thing. But tell him, he’s not allowed to do that again (the break). If he ever breaks your heart we would castrate him 😜
    Where is Carly? You haven’t talked about her for a while, is she just busy with life. And what about Preston?
    Did you ever have the exit interview at your other job? Did you tell them anything about Andrew?

    • that’s true and it’s so different when it’s your actual long term boyfriend. I don’t think I could ever go through with it (and I’m honestly so surprised that Brady even said he would). he is so good lately and I feel like it’s inspiring me to be too. he’s making me happy and I want to make him happy too.

      I haven’t really, really talked to Carly since I had lunch with her and asked her about what she said to Brady while we were broken up. I don’t know if she’s mad or we’re both just busy or what. Preston and I text everyday, but he’s super busy being butt buddies with his friend Nicole.

      I got an email to do an exit survey for my old job that I just remembered about after your comment. i meant to complete it last week.

  5. Kaycee says:

    Ugh I have baby and dog fever so bad! But the restaurant we opened last year isn’t making enough of a profit yet for us to have a kid and we’re not home enough for a dog.

  6. kelseyxsays says:

    I do NOT like to even *think* about sharing my husband with another woman, so a threesome is a million percent never going to happen. haha I do not know how people do it while in a committed relationship, it would definitely cause me to question everything (Am I not enough for him!? Why did he look at her the whole time?! Why did he look at her, period?! OMG OMG OMG) – yeah. hahaha! Although, when my husband and I talked about threesomes while we were dating, I asked if he would be willing to do a threesome with another MAN and he said “no way in hell” – well, that’s a little bit of a double standard. If he can have another woman, I sure as hell better get the option to have another man, too. Juuuuuust sayin. Needlesstosay… threesomes have never ever been discussed again 🙂
    As far as a dog… I would really think about it. They are a very long 10-20 year commitment and they can make everything a little bit harder and more expensive (boarding them for trips, etc.) So – the idea might be great, but you may not want to give up your freedom just yet; especially if you didn’t have dogs growing up so I feel like you don’t completely realize how much time and commitment it takes to have a dog. lol

    • kelseyxsays says:

      **ALSO- Disclaimer**
      If you are ready for that committment then go for it, all I am saying is that you should REALLY think about it first. Be realistic! I have seen it time and time again where people buy dogs and then end up getting rid of them. That’s not fair to the poor animal, who doesn’t understand why they were abandoned.

  7. Hebbsxo says:

    Relationship envy is so hard to turn off in your mind. Set some goals for your relationship with each other, like vacations or moving in together–something that will have quick results to hold off the envy pangs of bigger things like marriage and babies. Not every relationship is perfect as you can imagine from the outside looking in, sometimes it’s a front. Enjoy the now and plan for near future nows.

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