One of my first weekends at ASU, I had plans of going to a party with all my new friends. It was one of those theme parties, CEOs and Office Hoes. For the occasion, I wore a tight black pencil skirt, a tight black vest with a white lacy bra under it and a pair a black patent Steve Madden pumps that I wore for my high school graduation. On fucking point!

The party was held at a house off campus. A lot of athletes/fraternity boys lived there, but it wasn’t an official frat house. They were serving jungle juice out of an 18 gallon tub complete with pineapples and fruit floating on top. My friends and I eagerly held out our styrofoam cups to be filled up.

I only remember drinking one and a half cups of the punch and then the night began to get blurry. I was kind of embarrassed to be so drunk so quickly so I was trying to keep it together while mingling. I remember giggling a ton and everyone just staring at me. Typical.

The party ended up getting busted by the police so we all ran out a back door so we didn’t get minor in consumption charges. During the flee to the driveway, we met up with a group of guys from one of the sports teams. Apparently I was struggling to get away in my heels and one of the guys told me to hop on his back. The guys offered to give us a ride back to campus and we happily took the ride.

I ended up squished in the backseat next to Devin. I immediately noticed how tall he was, how funny his legs looked scrunched up behind the passenger seat. And then I took a look at his outfit – his obviously expensive slacks, gray dress shirt, loosened tie and suspenders. And the way his shirt fit his big arms, the way his pants clung to his toned thighs. And finally, I noticed how beautiful he was. He had thick black hair cut short into a fade, immaculate tan skin (he’s a mix between black, white and Filipino), cheekbones Kim Kardashian would pay millions for, perfect teeth and a pair of huge diamond studs to complete his look. Literally everything about him was so perfect I wanted to cry. How had I not seen him at the party?

I turned to him and grabbed his face then said something like, “You’re beautiful!” because I don’t know how to be subtle.

He said, “Me?! Look at you!” and we both laughed.

I took some selfies with my Sony CyberShot (I know, I’m old) that I used to love to look back on. The pictures are blurry and we are trashed, but it was just such a fateful night.

The guys dropped us back off at the dorm, but they came up with us. Devin immediately made himself comfortable in my twin size zebra print bed. He looked good in it so I wasn’t about to say anything. I took some pictures of him in my bed for my records.

I don’t remember how it happened, but I ended up next to him under all my blankets. He smelled so fucking good. Like delicious. I was obsessed. We were talking about everything. Being from Texas, wanting to move to LA, the best places to use fake IDs in Tempe, etc. I remember him being so cool to talk to. We had the same sense of humor. It wasn’t like we finished each other’s sentences, but we finished each other’s jokes. Mostly him finishing mine. I loved that.

Eventually all the other guys left and my roommate turned off all the lights.

“Should I get going?” Devin asked me.

I shook my head furiously. “No. You can stay.”

I rolled over so he could spoon me, both still fully clothed, and he started popping the buttons on my vest. I let him. Once my vest was off, he fumbled with my bra for a little while, confused by the front clasp.

“What the fuck?” he whispered in my ear. As you can see, Devin has always been romantic.

I giggled and undid my bra for him. He massaged all over me for a little while until I reached behind me for his buckle. Let’s get this show on the road!

Eventually he lifted my skirt up and tried to stick his penis in me from behind, but I yelped in pain.

“What’s the problem?” Devin asked.

I reached around to feel his dick and immediately realized that my hand wouldn’t even fit around it. Oh hell no.

I didn’t want to seem like a baby though so I shrugged him off and climbed on top. I decided giving him head would probably be the less painful option and I began making my way down his body. I had to open my mouth so wide that my eyes started watering. But the sound that came out of Devin’s mouth made it worth it.

I think I did okay for a little while, but then Devin started coaching me.

“Put your lips over your teeth.”

“Swirl the head with your tongue.”

“Use your hand.”

Who knew I needed so much coaching? This went on for a long time. Until my lips were numb and I no longer had any saliva to speak of.

I started to get up and Devin moaned, “More.”

More?! I was already dying basically. It couldn’t have felt good anymore. But I wanted to impress him so I kept going for a few more minutes. Luckily or unluckily, he grabbed my hand and pulled me on top of him so I was straddling him. His baseball bat dick was still standing straight in the air.

“Hop on,” he instructed.

Lol, no. But again, I wanted to impress the beautiful man in my bed so I did. I could only make it about an inch or two before I started screaming and fell over on him.

“Reese, are you okay?” my roommate at the time asked.

“She’s fine,” Devin answered for me because my face was buried in his chest. He wrapped an arm around my waist and guided me down on him.

He whispered, “See? You’re fine.”

I felt like I’d been ripped apart.

“Yeah, totally fine,” I gasped.

He didn’t last much longer after that, thank goodness, because it hurt way too much for it to be enjoyable. Immediately after, I ran to the bathroom to make sure I wasn’t bleeding everywhere. Luckily it was only a little bit.

I got back in bed and Devin and I snuggled and talked for a little bit before falling asleep. I just remember it being so fun and me being so excited to find someone who was not only hot as shit, but also just as funny as me. I could basically see the rest of our lives playing out in front of me.

When I woke up, Devin was gone. And for a brief hungover moment, I thought that I dreamed the whole thing. But then I found a note he left on my desk written on a hot pink post-it:

“Add me on Facebook.” And he left his full name so I could find him.

I looked him up immediately trying to gather as much information as I could. I didn’t add him until later on in the day though because I didn’t want to be too desperate. I uploaded all the pictures from our night out including the drunk backseat selfies and Devin in my bed. I needed the entire world to know that I’d hung out with him. And hopefully they assumed we hooked up too. I even tagged him.

I got an inbox message from him a little later with a single smiley which I thought was so cute and coy. I remember it taking me forever to think of something to say and I finally decided on something like, “When are we going to hang out?”

And he said, “Tomorrow. Text me.” And he left his number.

I can’t remember why, but we didn’t end up hanging out the next day, but we texted non stop. Every time I would think the conversation was over, he would keep it going because Devin is just so good at talking.

The following Monday, I was walking to class on campus and I saw Devin. And he was holding hands with a tiny little Colombian cheerleader. They looked so bizarre together with him being so tall and her being so short. He spotted me and nodded his head and smiled big, but didn’t say anything.

I was hella (taking it back) confused and obviously a little bit heartbroken. I was too afraid to text him and confront him about it mostly because I wanted to pretend it didn’t happen. And I didn’t want to seem clingy and cause drama so soon into our relationship. I did however ask my sorority friend who was big into campus drama about it. I hadn’t told her about my escapades with Devin and pretended that I was just interested in him.

“Oh yeah, that’s his girlfriend,” she informed me. “They’ve been together since the fall. Aren’t they like perfect?”

Nope. Devin was perfect with me. But if he had a girlfriend, why did he spend the night with me? And was this girlfriend just okay with her man posing for pictures on Facebook in another girl’s bed?

Apparently not. Half a semester of Facebook feuds, passive aggressive eye rolling, drunken fights at parties (my friends and I were always fighting her friends. She was on the cheer squad and had an image to uphold) and nonstop sex with Devin ensued. We were both knowingly fucking him at the same time. I clearly left my dignity back home. She ended up transferring to a school in Houston ironically and I spent the rest of my college career battling every other girl on campus for Devin. She wins.