i know i’m not a walk in the park.

I was so excited for Wednesday happy hour. Preston and Carly were joining us and Kendra found a place that was having two-for-one frozen drinks. We ended up getting this adorable server who I spent most of the evening flirting with. I realized that I had no desire to date a waiter (personal preference) so I decided to hook him up with Carly instead!

He stopped by our table to check on us and I took the opportunity to begin my matchmaking scheme. I subtly asked if he (Chris) had a girlfriend and when he said no, I pointed out that Carly was also single. I began finding other random things they had in common like both of their names started with the letter C and they both had neutral colored shirts on. They were practically meant for each other. I insisted they exchange numbers after we paid the bill and Carly awkwardly obliged.

As we walked out of the restaurant, Carly asked, “Reese, what the fuck was that?”

I feigned surprise. “What do you mean? I was doing you a favor.”

“Reese, do you remember what happened last time you tried to set one of us up?” Kendra asked.

“What?” I replied.

“I was harboring a fugitive for two weeks because his parents threw him out!” Carly exclaimed.

I erupted in laughter. I completely forgot about that. How was I supposed to know the guy had several warrants out for his arrest? People don’t tell you these things right away.

On my way home, I got a text from Eric inviting me to come over. Even though I knew I shouldn’t, I told him yes and he said he would be over in an hour to pick me up. Though the whole Brooke situation was unclear, Eric expressed that he wanted to continue seeing me and I thought that was really sweet. Plus I had a fresh Brazilian that I needed to show off.

We got to his place and snuggled on the sectional while watching Netflix. Naturally this turned into me bouncing up and down on his dick. Afterwards, Eric began getting dressed and said he was willing to take me home whenever I was ready.

I sat there naked, looking at him. Usually I spent the night without question and now suddenly he was kicking me out?

“Um okay. Do you have something to do tonight?” I looked at the clock on his cable box. “It’s 10:30?”

“Not tonight, but in the morning. I have a meeting really early…” he said, pulling his shirt over his head.

“Can’t you take me home on the way there?” I pressed on.

“I would rather not. Your place is not on the way to my meeting. In fact, it’s in the opposite direction. It would be an inconvenience.”

“I’m an inconvenience?”

Eric rolled his eyes. “I didn’t say that. I would just rather you not sleep here tonight.”

I really didn’t care about spending the night with him that much, but the fact that he was so adamant about me leaving was pissing me off.

“Is this about Brooke?” I asked, in an accusatory tone.

Eric sighed. “No. This is about me.”

“Lies. It’s totally about her.”

“Reese,” Eric started, but I interrupted him.

“You and Brooke are totally a couple. I’m not stupid. I know that’s why you stopped calling me,” I continued.

“No, I stopped calling you because you’re fucking crazy!” Eric shouted.

I was silent. It is rare that a guy can just shut me up like that. But that stung. I know I’m not a walk in the park, but crazy?

“Um, okay,” was all I said. I began getting dressed.

“I didn’t mean it like that, Reese. You just do some crazy shit sometimes,” he backtracked.

I ignored him and finished getting dressed. The drive to my apartment was relatively silent and when we got to my apartment, Eric put a hand on my knee.

“Bye, Reese,” he said with such finality that I knew it was the end of us. I wasn’t particularly sad, mad or upset because I knew I had fucked up any chances with him anyway. But I know I am going to miss our sexcapades. Oh and riding through the city in a Bentley.

“Bye!” I sang and slammed his car door.

He sped off before making sure I got inside safely which was actually really rude.

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