Since Kendra cancelled happy hour on Wednesday I made her get drinks with me on Thursday night. I hadn’t had a chance to tell her about my birthday or meeting Brady’s parents. She showed up late to the bar and I immediately demanded she take a shot. Then I rambled on and on about my birthday dinner and the rooftop afterwards. How I had fought with Derrick once again, how Jessica had showed up and rubbed Brady’s thigh, how Brady said he was falling for me.
“Why are you always fighting with Derrick? He’s like the most harmless person on the planet,” she said as if that was highlight of the story.
“Because he’s annoying,” I said, dismissively. “Anyways, what about Jessica? I went to see Brady at work yesterday and they were going to lunch together.”
“So? It’s lunch, not some scandalous rendezvous.”
“How do we know that?”
“Did you ask Brady about it?”
I looked at her like she suggested a threesome between the three of us. “I’m not asking him anything. I would sound like some jealous, mega-attached psycho.”
“He said he’s falling for you, Reese. He isn’t hooking up with Jessica. I’m sure she just has a huge crush on him and he probably likes the attention.”
What she said made sense, but then I realized that I give Brady enough attention so he shouldn’t have to seek any from Jessica. I took a sip of my martini then told Kendra about Brady’s parents. Her only conclusion was that I should’ve never mentioned Obama and that it was obvious (even just from hearing my story) that they were Republicans. She’s right. I definitely should’ve seen the clues.
Finally, I asked her to tell me about her vacation with John.
“It was a ton of fun. We love any chance we can get away from the city,” she said.
“Let me see your ring.”
Kendra rolled her eyes. “He didn’t propose, Reese.”
Thankfully. As much as I like to tease Kendra about getting engaged, the day it happens I’m going to be devastated. Because once she becomes a married woman, she won’t want to go out for drinks and happy hour and get belligerent on weekends. She will become this serious housewife and only want to spend time with her husband. And then she will start having children and we will no longer have anything in common. I would basically be losing my best friend.
After drinks, I texted Brady to see if he was off work yet and he said that he was exhausted and working late. This struck me as weird and all of my insecurities about Jessica came rushing back to the surface. First of all, he was always exhausted – we both were – so why was that an excuse not to hang out? We hang out every single night no matter what time he got off. I didn’t text him back and instead took a relaxing two hour shower and got ready for bed.
I checked my phone and Brady had texted me again saying that he was off work and could come over if I was still up. Oh sure, now that he was done fucking Jessica he wanted to hang out with me.
I put my phone down with no intention of responding and got in bed. I started thinking about how hurt Brady looked when I admitted I didn’t open his gift. How he had bought me a plane ticket to Houston because he sensed that I missed my family. I never expressed to him how much I really did, but he picked up on those clues. Finally, I thought about how he said he was falling for me. As much as I hate to admit it, I think I’m falling for him too.
I quickly picked up my phone and told him that I was sorry, but already in bed. I couldn’t possibly pretend to be mad at him even if I have some suspicions about Jessica.
On Friday, we had our weekly staff meeting and I was going to present some mockups for the watercolor artist collaboration to see if anyone thought it would be worth it.
After I presented, Whitney insisted she share some ideas she’s working on. It really annoyed me because she is supposed to be assisting me with my ideas, not coming up with her own. We are a team, not in competition. She started with the “discount furniture bazaar” idea and talked about how we could be exposed to a ton of clients who had never heard of us. Duh. Because people who can afford our stuff don’t shop at flea markets.
I raised my hands and expressed my concerns about the message it would send if we were being associated “discount.”
Before Whitney could respond, Dave said, “You know, it might actually be good for us. We don’t want to come off as a snobby company. If we make our products available to people who are price conscious, it will show humility.”
I didn’t say anything. Did I mention that I’m a control freak? I am in charge of all marketing and promotion and I know what’s best for the company. I can’t let this flea market shit go down.
Brady called around 7:30 and invited me over. I stuffed some clothes and toiletries in my bag and headed over there.
“Welcome,” Brady said, letting me in. He was still in his clothes from work and I realized that I missed him on the one day we didn’t get to hang out.
“Hello,” I chirped, hugging him. He nuzzled his face in my neck and I felt a tingle rush down between my legs. I pulled away and kissed him. “How was your day?”
“It’s Friday so I can’t complain. Do you want a beer?”
I followed him into the kitchen and he grabbed two beers while I poured a glass of wine. We took our libations to his room and sat there talking about our days. I steered clear of complaining about Whitney because clearly he would take her side. Eventually he said he was going to take a quick shower and I changed into sleeping clothes and got in bed.
I noticed his phone sitting on the night table next to me and I casually picked it up. His background picture was of a German Shepherd dog which I couldn’t decide if I thought was cute or weird. It honestly should have been a picture of me. I was surprised that when I slid to unlock his phone that he didn’t have a passcode so I had full access to everything. I honestly didn’t expect to find anything though.
I looked through the apps he had downloaded, all normal things like his bank, Google Maps, GroupMe, etc. I opened his messages: Me, Mom, Chris… Then I saw the thread with Jessica. I couldn’t even stop myself from opening it.
All the messages were very innocent – at first. Things like “Have a good weekend.” and “The fourth floor is crazy right now.” Mostly Jessica sending messages and Brady responding. Very one sided. I scrolled up more and saw conversations about sports that I didn’t even bother reading because they were so long and I don’t even care about sports. I kept scrolling up until I saw a picture. Jessica sent it – it was of her in a tight black dress taken in a full length mirror.
“Going out tonight. Do you like my outfit?” she’d captioned.
Brady responded, “Looks great.”
I kept scrolling up and then I came upon another picture from Jessica. In this one she was in the same mirror, but she was completely naked. I could see everything – her huge tits (I thought my boobs were pretty big, but hers take the cake), faint bikini tan line, landing strip, and tiny hip tattoo. There was no caption and Brady responded, “Very nice.” I checked the date – May 24. Before Brady and I even met.
I continued refreshing older messages and finding more nude pictures. All from Jessica. She would change her pose up – one where she was touching her vagina, another showed a close up of her boobs and face with her finger in her mouth. Brady always responded with something like “Nice” or “Looks good.” I felt like I was suffocating. I know it all happened before we had even met, but obviously he and Jessica have sexual history and he didn’t bother telling me.
I heard the shower turn off and I quickly sent two of the naked pictures to myself then hopped out of bed. I was embarrassed and hurt, but mostly really fucking pissed off.
I was waiting outside the door when Brady emerged from the shower. He was just wearing a towel around his waist and had water dripping down his chest. I held up his phone with a shaky hand.
“What the fuck?” I said slowly because I couldn’t even think of anything else to say.
Brady looked confused. “What?”
I opened one of the naked pictures and showed it to him. He looked at it blankly.
“I can’t fucking believe this.”
He walked passed me and sat on the bed.
“How could you introduce me to Jessica and fail to mention that you guys have had some sort of sexual relationship in the past?”
Brady didn’t say anything.
“No wonder she’s been giving me condescending looks. Y’all are probably still hooking up,” I said.
“No,” Brady said calmly.
“Did you fucking have sex with her?” I demanded.
“No!” he exclaimed as if that was the most ridiculous conclusion I could’ve come to after seeing the pictures.
“Then what happened?”
When he didn’t answer, I said, “And don’t say ‘nothing’ because that’s a fucking lie.”
“Once,” he said, quietly. “We went in an empty patient room. And she…” He trailed off.
“She what?”
He started making gestures with his hands that told me he didn’t know what to say.
“She sucked your dick?”
Brady sighed. “Yeah.”
“You’re fucking gross,” I glared at him.
I suddenly remembered back to the night of the charity event when I tried to have sex with him in the bathroom and he told me no. He couldn’t hook up with me at a work event, but he could hook up with Jessica at work? I don’t know if I overestimated him or underestimated him. I thought he was too mature and conservative to do such a thing in a public place, but clearly he was very capable of it.
“I owe you a huge apology. I withheld that information because I am not proud of it. I understand why you’re upset and you deserved to know.”
I crossed my arms across my chest.
“I’m terribly sorry. I’m really embarrassed,” Brady said.
“You’re embarrassed?” I seethed. “Imagine how I feel. You’re flaunting Jessica in my face knowing what happened between y’all. Do you understand how stupid it makes me look? Now the b-day comment and the thigh touching all makes perfect sense.”
Brady’s brow furrowed.
“Is there anything I can do to remedy this situation?” he asked very calmly.
“No!” I screeched. And then I became aware of the delicate iPhone in my hand. No protector case or passcode? Silly Brady. “Have a nice life!”
I threw the phone with all of my strength on the tile bathroom floor and heard a painful sounding crack. I grabbed my bag and stormed out of there while Brady watched me, but didn’t try to stop me.
I got in my car and took a few deep breaths. It wasn’t until I started driving that I realized that yes, I was mad as fuck, but I was actually way more hurt. I like Brady. Way more than I ever planned to.
Even though my eyes felt hot with tears and I had a dry lump in my throat, I wasn’t going to let myself cry. Fuck that.
I already know what y’all are going to say. Bring it on.
hot mess in high heels. 
Aw Reese 😦
Geez, I feel sick for you too. You guys make such a great couple – I’m really hoping you can work it out. I really feel like at this point it is all one sided, with her pursuing him, but he is just being cordial at work and wants none of her. I hope he mans up and shuts her down for good. Maybe if he does that you should give him another chance. After all, you had sex with blow job after you knew him. If it was before you he really did nothing wrong. He probably just didn’t know how to tell you & not make you uncomfortable. I think he is actually a good guy.
That’s really sad. I think you should give him another chance though. He obviously mishandled the situation but I think he was being genuine when he said it was because he was embarrassed of her. SHE should be humiliated, not you. How pathetic does she look, sending naked pictures to a guy who so clearly doesn’t want her that he brings another girl to their work event?
I also think the fact that he didn’t even bring up the fact that you went through his phone as a way of getting out of trouble (which most guys would’ve done) shows that he does really feel awful.
I know it’s hard to trust someone again once they’ve hurt you, especially when you don’t usually let people in that far, but he deserves another chance. He’s a great guy who cares about you – don’t let him go over this!
Ooh, totally agree with the bit about looking through his phone. Most his would be pissed and use that as immediate defense, but he didn’t even bring it up.
Guys*
Awww so sorry Reese but it seems like Brady does really like you so I’m sure he’ll fix things….if not it’s his loss!
ehhhhh i dont think it was THAT bad, obviously he couldve done more after that and he chose not too, so hes not into her, and obviously hes ashamed of that type of behavior at work so that explains why he didnt let you do it as well. I think NOT having a password is good, shows hes not trying to hide anything, cause I wouldve asked wtf are you going thru my phone for!? Have your little hissy fit and then get back on the Brady train, he’s human and you dug him. Don’t eff this up Reese! lol
I can’t believe y’all think it’s not that bad and we should try to work it out. he only told me what happened because he got caught, imagine what else he didn’t tell me about. probably explains the condoms too. don’t trust him.
I agree, it probably doesn’t help that I’m just as suspicious of guys as you. But the fact that he was still hanging out with her after they’ve had a sexual encounter would worry me too. I would feel so foolish knowing that they always had this secret and I was walking around thinking he was all mine and she was just desperate. How do you bounce back from that? You have had sex with Bj after you met Brady buuuuut you didn’t keep texting him and you don’t have to see him everyday at work.
agreed!
Guys are allowed to have a life prior to current relationships. And he doesn’t have to divulge every aspect of it. He’s given you no reason not to trust him and he hasn’t “flaunted” her. If anything she’s shamelessly flaunted herself because she’s clearly jealous and intimidated by you. Id give him another shot, but don’t be surprised if he’s guarded.
Also, not cool going through the phone.
agree to disagree.
I agree that if he is still going to be spending time around her that he should have Atleast told you that there was something between them, but that it ended once he met you. He may have thought he was doing the right thing, even if you don’t agree with it. He really should have deleted those messages off his phone though. Having naked photos of another girl is not ok once you start seeing someone else. Also, I am highly concerned what you are going to do with the ones you emailed to yourself. Please don’t do anything that would cause irreparable damage between you too. As much as you think Jessica is a terrible person, don’t let anyone else see those pictures. Maybe you need to talk to him and let him know you don’t want to be kept in the dark, even if th information is not something that you really want to be true. I think you’ve been together long enough to ask him about, and tell him, of who you have been with in the past. It might put you more at ease to be so open with him. I truly believe that you too can get past this.
blackmail obviously. 😈🔪
Omg, I had a huge knot in my stomach for you while I was reading that. Worst feeling ever.
But honestly, how pathetic is jessica? She was sending him naked pics and sucked his dick and he STILL didn’t want her. I bet when he brought you to that work event she felt like the biggest idiot, and that’s probably why she’s been trying to make you feel insignificant.
Since he got those pics before he even knew you, I think the only thing I’d care about is that he still had them. I don’t think he should have told you about it because I don’t think what happened before you is really your business, but he should have been putting space between himself and her since something sexual had happened, and I’d be pissed about that too.
I think when you talk about this with him, you need to tell him how badly he hurt you and how stupid it made you feel to find out about all that after he’d taken you around her. I think the best approach with Brady is to tell him how horrible he made you feel. He’ll be so upset he did that, I think it’s the best way to teach him a lesson. But I don’t think this should be a deal breaker. I really dont. All he really did here was not tell you about some pathetic whore who’s been chasing him around.
I hate all this for you, Reese. This sucks 😦
I’m going to make him feel horrible.
Have you told him about all of your past sexual experiences? I don’t remember you being forth-coming with him on all of the advances Derek has made. Plus, and I might be wrong, but I seem to remember you running into someone you hooked up with when you were out and you didn’t give him the details. And you left out hooking up with the intern when you were telling Brady about the work drama because you didn’t want to look bad. You weren’t wrong per-say in any of those instances, so why is Brady?? The past is the past and he did introduce you as his GF when you meet this girl. Because he sees a future with you and wanted her to stop her advances. Just my 2 cents:).
I don’t know who you think we ran into that I hooked up with? can’t remember. and you’re right about Derrick for sure. we kind of (tried to) hooked up so if I do talk to Brady I’ll tell him about that. not BJ though
The main difference is she doesn’t have naked pictures of Derrick or BJ on her phone. Derrick said he wanted to be more than friends and she rejected him. As for BJ, she isn’t around him or even speak to him. Brady and Jessica are friendly, they have lunch together and do hospital runs together. I’m confused why a man would keep naked pictures and continue to speak with a woman he isn’t interested in. Brady didn’t introduce Reese as his girlfriend. Jessica asked if she was his girlfriend and he hesitated and then said yes.
Liz takes the cake. I agree with her.
Reese, I am so sorry you had to find out this way. But look, you never asked him if they had a thing before you two hooked up. You wondered and speculated but you never asked. It seems you have a tendency to internalize rather than talk to the other person and in relationships, that won’t work.
You need to let him in, he has been honest with you about his feelings and is invested in your relationship. If you carefor him enough, talk to him. Tell him that moving forward you want full transparency – but that goes two ways. That means telling him about Derrick.
Don’t throw away something good. This IS good and you cannot get upset with him about something that happened BEFORE you. I know you’re in the mad stage
..but before you do anything, take a step back and think. Brady asked you all the right questions and was honest with you. He asked what he could do to make things work…thats a sign of a mature man.
Talk to him Reese. Don’t yell…just talk and be honest. You hold all of your emotions inside – theres a freedom of being honest with your sig other and no walls.
*hugs!*
I’m just mad he didn’t tell me and I don’t think it’s my job to have to ask.
How do you expect him to communicate well if you don’t?
It honestly seems to me as if you’re not going to listen to any of the good advice and you’re just going to go apeshit on him. You should have asked him about her a long time ago because you were uncomfortable. You seem like one of those girls who just expects their boyfriends to know what they want.
As for having the pics on his phone, maybe they’re just there because he doesn’t care enough to think about/delete/hide them.
Of course it sucks that he’s in contact with Jessica, but you guys never even had an exclusivity talk. He’s not just going to bring up getting his dick sucked by other girls (which is a very uncomfortable topic for him) when you can’t even define your relationship.
you’re right, I do expect my bf to know what I want. I already admitted that I suck at communicating and talking. and for your information, if Brady and I do talk again, I plan on asking him and telling him everything.
This is solid advice, Reese. A talk is necessary.
You both have a past and you need to air it out to move forward.
Good luck! ❤
def planning a talk if Brady contacts me!
I hope you take everything I say as positive and me trying to be helpful.
I think you need to put yourself in his shoes… And you kind of have been. It’s not the same, but he was around Derek two nights and you didn’t tell him that you guys hooked up. If Brady knew that Derek was hitting on you right under Brady’s nose, don’t you think he would feel like he looked stupid, too?His thing with Jessica is way worse, but it’s still along the same lines as what Kendra said: Jessica has a huge crush on him and Brady wants nothing to do with her. The thigh brush is unacceptable. Still having the pictures is unacceptable. He accepted a blow job once, which I think most guys would. Again, he should have told you since you’re around her and he seemed sincerely upset that he hurt you for that. He cares for you so much, Reese, and I know I don’t actually know you, but from what I read in posts, it seems like he’s bringing out the best in you. In my opinion, you did the right thing making it clear that it’s not okay (even though, I think calling him disgusting and smashing his iPhone was a little over the line), but you should work with him to maintain the relationship. Now that the Jessica information is out on the table, it should be smooth sailing for you guys. And while this may make posts a bit more boring :-p, I think you deserve that!
The Derrick thing is not the same at all
I wrote that it was not the same, but it could be beneficial to put yourself in his shoes and that situation is similar
maybe you’re right. I’m being totally selfish right now. if I look at it from Brady’s perspective, I can see how he could possibly be pissed at me for not telling him that Derrick and I have some history… 😦
You acted so immature! You don’t deserve to feel upset, he didn’t ask you about your ex’s, like you said it was before you even met. I would’ve asked why that thread is still open. allowing the pictures to be there, but I can’t just what my bf did with his previous flings and ex’s, because right now he’s committed to me. You saying in a comment above how you will make feel horrible, just make you a horrible person, and I’m not surprised you haven’t had relationships, because that is not the way to discuss issues with your partner. And for him to need to tell you first?its not his job to go down the list of naughty things he did, it develops through time that you start discussing the past.
he should feel horrible! I don’t know why you think that makes me a bad person. he should’ve told me that he and Jessica hooked up if he was going to bring her around me. that’s all I ask
All the commenters told you from the gala, to be more open with Brady, to have a concrete conversation with him about where you stand and be clear on what is happening. I did get carried away by calling you horrible so I’m sorrt about that. But I do believe you over reacted, you needed to stay and let him explain. Brady is clearly like no one you’ve been with before, you need to not compare him to previous guys, and let him be himself. Talk to him and don’t over react, if you truly are falling for him
I know, I need to be more open. I’m working on it I swear
Would it be a deal breaker if he did tell you they slept together?
I don’t know. I don’t even know how I feel about him now
I don’t think you should throw away a potentially good relationship because of this. As a previous commentor said, Brady does seem to bring out a better side of you. I think he is a good guy. He needs to cut ties with that bitch & definitely do some groveling to get you back. And you both need to be more open & honest about your feelings from here on out.
I have to say I would have reacted the same as you – throwing his phone & leaving. The ball should be in his court at this point & some ass kissing & honesty is in order.
agreed!
I disagree Jenny. I think Reese has every right to be upset. She’s not asking for full disclosure about his sexual past, just the truth about Jessica who he is around on a daily basis since they work together. She deserves to know the complete truth. Calling Reese a horrible person and making a snide comment (“Not surprised you haven’t had relationships”) is rude, judgmental and uncalled for. This is her REAL life. If she’s upset, she has every right to be. It’s not up to anyone us to tell her how SHE should feel or react. Everyone is different.
Ever since she’s met Jessica she felt something was off, but couldn’t put her finger on it. The night of her birthday, Jessica “ruined” her party and then blatantly touching his thigh. She made her feelings about Jessica known. Asked Brady why she was there and he didn’t know? To me there are certain things that don’t add up. I feel and I could be wrong that there is more about Jessica that he isn’t sharing. Final thing about Jessica, don’t use the pictures to blackmail or threaten her. Your issue should be with Brady, he’s the one you’re dating. A relationship is based on trust, without trust a relationship cannot grow and flourish.
thank you. I agree that I think there is more to the Jessica situation too. he wasn’t even going to tell me until I confronted him and even then I had to pull it out of him
I’m surprised that almost everyone is blaming Jessica instead of Brady. I don’t know why everyone is giving him the benefit of doubt. I think he got a lot more than a blowjob from Jessica. When she brushed his thigh that night he didn’t even flinch. The long, super tight hugs are nothing new to him. He is clearly familiar and comfortable with her. Brady pretends to be this straight laced, I don’t want to rush into sex yet guy but meanwhile he’s not. It makes sense he’s always “working late”, the condom in his pocket (probably carries one just in case he hooks up with Jessica), missing condoms, her showing up at your birthday and then you seeing them going to lunch. If he wasn’t interested in her he would’ve cut ties. Instead he’s leading her on.
You’re his girlfriend, at least that’s what he admitted to when Jessica asked at the work party. That night he refused to have sex in the bathroom with you but gave you oral when you got back to his place, nothing more. I have a feeling that he and Jessica hooked up at the party and that’s why he opted to not have sex with you. Regardless, Jessica isn’t at fault here. It’s Brady. He’s the one in the relationship and should set boundaries. If he leads Jessica on knowing she is into him, that’s on him, not her. As women we need to stop blaming other women when our man fucks up. You have no idea what he’s told her or their complete history. I don’t think Brady will be forthcoming either.
I feel for you. I know what it’s like to really like someone and pretty much put them on a pedestal, only to be disappointed and hurt when you find out the truth. I personally have question marks. I don’t know what I’d do if I were you. Jessica and his work together and that would always make me feel slightly uncomfortable, not knowing what the hell was going on. I think you might have given him and out when you said “she sucked your dick.” I wonder if he would’ve said yes if you said “she fucked you” instead. He didn’t tell you, you had to pull it out of him. I wonder what else he’s hiding.
I agree completely with you. I had to find all this out for myself so imagine what else probably happened that he didn’t bother telling me about. and he would have never told me if I didn’t confront him. I def think they had sex
That is paranoia to the extreme. Like seriously read over that entire response. Every opportunity that could be read into negatively is taken to the worst case scenario. As if he would have hooked up with Jessica at the party! If he was the skeaze he’s painted as in that reply, he would’ve thought nothing of fucking both girls in one night. Or at the same party for that matter. What does him giving Reese oral prove? Unless Jessica has a Venus fly trap vagina that would have left a telltale sign on his junk, how would Reese have known? Calm down.
His explanation for why he kept it to himself makes perfect sense. It’s the same reason why Reese didn’t say anything about BJ – bc it’s EMBARRASSING and you don’t admit your worst decisions to someone you just started dating and are still trying to impress. Everyone knows you don’t reveal the worst stuff about yourself in the honeymoon stage – the relationship is too fragile. Reese, you said yourself that you didn’t tell him about BJ because you would judge somebody who’d done that. It was the same thing. Agreed that he mishandled it but no, that doesn’t automatically mean that he lied about everything else. Good grief.
okay you’re making a lot of sense alli. I obviously know what it’s like to be embarrassed about hooking up with a coworker. now I kind of feel bad. btw I do not think Brady and Jessica had sex the night of the work dinner
As if he would’ve had naked pics of Jessica on his phone? I said hooked up with Jessica not that he fucked her the night of the party. It sucks that so many women on here have turned this durian p situation around and have Reese feeling like she did something wrong. How would Brady feel if he find out about Derrick? Reese didn’t fuck or hook up with Derrick. She shut him down. You fucked bj? Yes she did but it’s not like she has naked pics of him on her phone or sees him daily. Reese deserved to know the truth and Brady should’ve manned up. What’s he doing with Jessica’s naked pics if he’s not into her and embarrassed? Doesnt make sense. If you want to listen to everyone and feel awful for reacting how you did and run back to Brady and apologize then so be it. I think you need to find out all the facts and not automatically think Brady is oh so innocent.
oh I don’t think he’s innocent and I am not running back to him at all. like I said, it’s not the fact that they hooked up – I get that he had a life before me. I don’t like that he didn’t tell me that they did stuff and continues to hang out with her daily and introduced me to her etc. plus now I’m not sure if what he said happened is all that happened.
So if BJ hadn’t been reassigned, Reese would have been expected to tell Brady about that hookup just because they were still working together? Never would have happened.
He should’ve deleted his message thread. No argument there. And he should’ve been honest when jessica met Reese multiple times. Again, no argument. But seriously, “he carries a condom so he can hook up with her” – more like he carries a condom bc he stays at Reese’s place a lot. He works late bc his job is intense. Sometimes things really are what they are on the surface, this doesn’t have to be the tip of some shady, nefarious iceberg of deceit.
I understand why you flew off the handle, Reese. It would be impossible to be rational in that situation. I just think commenters should try to offer a rational perspective, instead of encouraging the crazy spiral that we all go into when we are hurt and feel betrayed.
Alli, he wasn’t having sex with Reese at that point. He’d just come home from work, in his work clothes when she invited herself over. I highly doubt that he was anticipating having sex with her in the living room and that’s why he had a condom in the pocket of his work pants. If it were in his wallet it would be more plausible. At that point he wasn’t staying at Reese’s place a lot. That was the first time they had sex! Sometimes we’re naive and think everything is idealistic and just as they appear on the surface instead of questioning things that don’t appear 100% kosher.. BJ was never going to be around forever. His internship was going to end before Brady and Reese made their relationship official if you can even call it that. Since he only said she was his girlfriend when directly asked by Jessica. Reese had sex with him but making assumptions and equating it to Jessica and Brady is a moot point. It sucks that so many of you are trying to guilt Reese into feeling bad or justifying Brady’s actions.
shit, I think the phone smashing was a little extreme, but the rest I think was warranted. and I think he was acting too calm about the whole thing. Like wouldn’t he be a little more frantic trying to make you believe that nothing more was going on or is going on between them? shady brady is right.
I never claimed to think rationally, especially in a heated moment like that. sorry… not sorry?
I would have done the same thing, like if you didn’t delete that thread then ima kill your phone to make sure you’ll never be able to keep those pictures >.> He wasn’t upfront about a sexual relation he had with a woman that he keeps on close contact with that keeps showing up near you two. I read comments comparing Brady and Jessica to you and Derrick. It is not the same at all!! You’re keeping Derrick away and don’t seem to plan to get back in contact with him while Jessica is seeing Brady every single day and on friendly terms. He better start kissing up to you and apologizing
To all those saying she shouldn’t throw away what she has with Brady, I think we need to know first if he’s tried to contact her since to do some serious grovelling. It’s up I him now IMO!
nope not at all!!
Maybe he is wanting to give you some time to cool off and you totally fucked his phone. The groveling needs to begin before the weekend is over. Have you talked to Carly? She should hear things from Chris.
I haven’t talked to Carly yet but I’m headed to brunch soon. I bet his phone is fine and if it isn’t, surely he is on his way to get a new one because he couldn’t even go a day without it
I read this post and felt that I had to immediately comment! I would have gotten so mad too and done exactly what you did! Like WTF?? Even if they had a thing in the past and he decided not to tell you I can understand his point of view that he doesn’t want you to be concerned and over thinking. HOWEVER after being together with you and confessing he was falling in love theb if you two were headed towards a relationship he should have at least deleted her messages! If he’s keeping them there he could have always been scrolling up to her nude pictures and whatever. If he deleted the entire thread, at least it shows he’s cutting off the past.Lastly, I can’t believe he didn’t stop you!!
I’m sorry:( it’s his call now to make this better. But I do think it was a good sign that he didn’t try to pull the whole “why are you looking at my phone” bullshit.
I don’t think him saying “why are you looking through my phone” is bullshit… Its invasion of privacy, I wouldve been pissed if my SO did that rather than bring it up in a different way. Reese did and could’ve had other opportunities to bring Jessica up but she didn’t for her reason and then it results of frustration built up…we all had the suspision of him having history with Jessica before she confirmed it
Lol they’re having sex and spending every night together…. I think it’s within her rights to look through his phone.
I’ve been married for 10 years later this month and we don’t go through each other phones. It’s an invasion of privacy.
It is never your right to look through someones phone without permission,
If you have nothing to hide it shouldn’t matter
Oh man, oh man. Reeeese! I won’t read the other comments yet, because I don’t want my opinion to be influenced- just going off of initial reaction here. I totally get why you’re upset, well deserved. He should’ve told you simply because she’s entered the picture a few times and it would’ve been nice to know that your presumptions were correct. BUT! I will say that I don’t know if storming out like that and breaking his phone was necessary. It did happen before you guys were together, the responses on his part were all direct “looks nice” or “very nice” and it doesn’t seem like he was ever really interested in her. Also, if he is as conservative as he’s stated previously and likes to keep sex/work separate, I can see why it may have been embarrassing to tell you about it. Especially after he turned you down. Your anger? I understand. The extent to which you took things, not sure I’m totally on board with that. But I feel like you guys should talk about it and move on because it doesn’t seem like that big of a deal to me. It would’ve been different if it happened while you guys were dating.
But, I don’t have to date him and if that’s a deal breaker for you- by all means drop him!
❤ Lynella
thank you. I understand you saying that what I did was extreme, maybe it was. at the time it felt like a big deal and I was upset.
I’d probably do the same thing if I was in your shoes, seriously after stuff like this, the trust is gone.
But I do believe he likes you a lot.
http://elinainlondon.com
I don’t understand how I would be expected to trust him after this.
Exactly, it would be hard.
Shit I’m so sorry
I want to hear what Carly says, if she even knows yet (Brady could be embarrassed—and should—so maybe he hasn’t said anything to Chris). As for what Brady did/didn’t do, you have every reason to be upset and pissed at him. And Jessica because she intentionally tried to flaunt Brady in your face. But the big point is that he was dishonest with you by not being forward with you. Yeah you could have asked (and I probably would have but that’s just how I handle things) but in no way were you obligated to.
Hopefully if he truly likes you as much as he says he does, he will try to make amends but you should figure out how much he really means to you in the grand scheme of things.
Sending love from the west coast❤️
thank you. ❤ I haven't talked to Carly yet but I might so her later so hopefully. I haven't heard from Brady at all so I'm not sure if he even wants to make amends.
Wow! I’m sorry!! I liked Brady. He’s a little odd but unique.
I don’t blame you at all. If he isn’t interested in that chick, why keep those pictures? I realize she works with him but he doesn’t really seem to need to keep in contact with her. Tons of women are after hot doctors but they can nip that stuff in the bud! Yeah, I agree that past relationships are normally past issues but not when you get confronted with them like you have been. He should’ve told you something about her. I agree it may not be worth leaving him but I’d sure be looking for him to grovel A LOT and tell you he’ll distance himself from her as much as possible & get rid of all pics/her contact info (that’s to start with). See how much he really cares for you on making ‘us’ work. I wonder how’d he feel if he was in your shoes? Tell him about Derrick if you think you need to but mainly to help get your point across. I bet he gives you a few days to calm down after smashing his phone. He knows you’re rightfully angry & hurt!
I agree that he needs to cut ties w/Jessica. they don’t even have to work together so that’s not an excuse to need to keep in contact with her
How is Brady a great guy? By keeping naked pics of Jessica on his phone? If he isn’t interested why not delete the pics? Why is he still hanging around Jessica? Oh he feels awful because he cheng mention you going through his phone? More like he was blindsided that he was caught and didn’t know what to say. Reese you deserve better.
exactly. I agree with all of this.
You should’ve thrown the phone at his face
hahaha I know right?
This is why you gotta communicate and speak up when something is bothering you when you are in a relationship. Letting your concerns, suspicions, etc. just build up to a point where you just explode isn’t healthy. I know it’s hard but you gotta do it. Especially when there’s a chance you are not going to hear what you want to hear. Should he have deleted the pics, yes because why keep them if he wasn’t interested. You said that he should have been up front, but since you never told him how you felt about her or that you even saw the thigh grab it may not have occurred to him that he needed to speak up. I think he sees you as so confident that he didn’t think her hanging around would faze you. I also think that Brady doesn’t have a clue when it comes to dating and relationships. Saying um yeah when someone asks if you are his girlfriend without having the conversation with you just sounds plain weird.
For a relationship to work you both have to communicate. I think for your own sanity you need to have a serious talk with him to find out what really happened. I’m not saying you have to give him another chance but it is going to drive you nuts wondering what really happened and if there was/is more. I can see what has happened negatively play a role in your future relationships if you don’t get closure. If he doesn’t reach out in the next few days, you need to be the bigger person and start the conversation. Meet him at a neutral location and make him give you answers. Why does he still have the pictures? Why hasn’t he cut her out of his life if he truly isn’t interested? Why didn’t he push her hand away at the bar (honestly that’s a big one for me)? Did he actually see you as his girlfriend or just someone he was dating?
I really do think there is more but not in a relationship sense. I am curious if she has something on him that she is holding over him.
I know you’ve been suspicious over him working late and being exhausted. I work in a hospital lab. In addition to performing testing on specimens I do have extra paperwork being a supervisor. It’s possible that he is catching up on paperwork that he doesn’t have time to during the day because of seeing patients.
I feel like you just read my entire life like a book. totes right.
I agree with everything Janet said. Also if you had to refresh to see the pictures it doesn’t mean he kept them. Its way up in his phone from months ago before you met. If they are saved on his phone in his photos then thats an issue, otherwise he could have just forgotten about them.
If Brady does’t reach out in the next few days, I’d say good riddance. However, I think that if he does and has an explanation and y’all decide to work things out you really need to ask all the questions that have been bugging you. I know you protect your emotions but its going to affect the trust in your relationship if you’re always wondering about things and not asking. So ask everything from the condoms to the party to why he was withholding sex. Maybe if you talk about all these things you’ll learn more about him and how he thinks and makes the decisions he makes.
At the end of the day it’s your life. You need to decide what you want and if you want to be in a relationship and the rules in said relationship. We’re all rooting for you.
I agree that he should’ve told you his real history with Jessica, but could it be that you overreacted because of your ex-bf that was a scumbag?
I think Jessica was being weird because she probably thinks that he cheated on you with her. You should’ve asked him about the thigh grabbing incident. Come on Reese you need to open up and voice your concerns because if you don’t you are just bottling it all inside and then you explode! Brady is probably wondering if apple care would cover crazy girlfriends hahaha
He’s probably just wanting to give you some time to cool down or at least I hope so. You guys need to sit down and have a good honest talk. It sounds like you already fell for him and that why it hurts so much. Just remember he didn’t cheat on you, it happened before you, he just didn’t tell you cause he was embarrassed.
And he probably never deletes old messages, I never do, I don’t think he’s going back to look at those pix. Come on you’ve been keeping him busy enough 😜
I hope you guys can talk it out.
I know, I know, I know! lesson learned. I should have never let all my emotions stay bottled in like that. clearly a bad idea. and my ex def might have something to do with it. it’s hard when your only relationship was a sucky and unhealthy one.
Not gonna lie, I keep refreshing to see if you updated. Can’t wait to know what happens dammit!
maybe tonight or in the morning babe!
Bahahaha I was just about to say this exact same thing! I feel like a nut checking it to see if it been updated 🙂
soon. 🙂
I wanna know what happened too. I have this premonition that Reese crawled back to Brady, apologized for going through his phone, getting upset and breaking his phone. They make up and all is good again. Brady gets off the hook and continues to hang out with Jessica behind Reese’s back. It’s not like she can keep track of him when he’s working. I hope this doesn’t happen because Reese can do better. Brady needs to grow some balls and cut ties with Jessica. I don’t know if I would be able to trust him completely ever though.
do you even read my blog? do you think I would ever “crawl” back to anyone? yeah right. I’m offended.
Well that was rude Alexa. You realize this is her real life right?
It wasn’t my intention to be rude and I apologize. I’ve read you’re blog from the beginning and love that you are free spirited and don’t care what others think. I’ve read the comments here and you’ve gone from being upset at Brady to feeling you did something wrong by not telling him about Derrick. Even about bj. If my boyfriend had naked pictures of a girl he hooked up with on his phone, I would be pissed. Having a make friend crush on you is not the same. I feel that you’re taking partial blame when you didn’t do anything wrong. You told Derrick you weren’t interested, you aren’t hanging out or texting him, I would hope you don’t have naked pictures of him either. You saying that you would tell Brady about Derrick makes it seem like you’re at fault for something. I get that you like Brady but don’t blame yourself or feel guilty when your situation with derrick is different than him and Jessica. To me if seems like you’re trying to justify his behavior by exaggerating yours.
I’m stressing out about this and it’s not even my life. I love this blog and can’t wait to see how things will play out. Brady should have been honest from the start BUT you should hear him out if and when he tries to talk.
Is everyone just ignoring the fact that she purposely went through his phone? How the hell do you get off going through someone’s phone and then act the victim because you don’t like what you found. You sound like a whiny, entitled, stuck up bitch. You are the type of woman that makes the rest look bad with your immature bullshit.
that’s rude.
Although Alex is rude he/she has a point. Everything is a big deal except when you do it. Regardless of what it is, you tried to sleep with Derrick and have had Derrick around Brady without disclosing your relationship at all. You have spoken about he BJ issues without telling him the whole truth. You expect total disclosure without doing so yourself.
It is hurtful to see the pictures but they were before he ever met you. He should have deleted them but breaking his phone is extreme and immature. If i was Brady I would cut my losses. It will only get worse.
we are all adults. you could have talked it out with him. And left but just because you are hurt doesn’t excuse your behavior. Your Best friend even called you a brat. Its not always everyone else.
so I shouldn’t have left? I should’ve stayed and broke more shit?
Or you could have stayed and asked the questions that you’ve always wanted to. He asked what he could do to remedy the situation. Thay would have been a good time to talk about your feelings and why you were upset
good point. I wasn’t thinking logically then though.
No because you shouldnt have broken anything to begin with. You need to learn to control your outbursts. I get that you were upset but you would not accept that behavior from anyone else, so you shouldnt accept it from yourself. The issue is Reese you make too many excuses for why you do things instead of looking inside yourself and fix them. Not communicating, and emotional outbursts are not okay from any adult. The situations you cant fix but you can fix how you react. Its easier for Brady, Derrick, BJ or anyone to understand what you are saying if you say it. And learn to assess the situation and rank it. Everything cant be a 10 on your scale bc people will begin to dismiss your feelings bc they see it as always being dramatic. Like your BFF and preston do now. If you want to be taken seriously you have to put your big girl panties on and act like an adult. It will work I promise.
I agree Bianca. I have a lot to work on for sure. I am making more of an effort but sometimes I feel like I literally cannot control myself. 😫
I can’t believe I actually read this blog still. I can feel myself becoming a worse person every time – can’t believe there are people this self-focused i the world and, even worse, people commenting who tell you that it’s totally normal to be such a dick.
Alex above is 100% correct. You had NO right to go through is phone and then get mad at him for invading HIS privacy. What he did with previous girlfriends or casual partners isn’t your business and doesn’t involve you. Unless, of course, you actually believe the world revolves around you. Gross.
I can’t believe you read it either. clearly not for someone like you.