I never really get on Facebook anymore. I check it maybe 2-3 times a week because I can’t stand all the stupid statuses and complaining and controversy. I want to delete it, but I have some people to spy on so I don’t.
Anyway, I changed my Facebook profile picture on Sunday night to a cute picture of me and Brady. I didn’t log on again until Wednesday evening before I left work. I had a bunch of notifications (people liking my pictures, commenting, birthday announcements – by the way, why does Facebook notify me of people’s birthdays? I don’t care) and a message. From Jessica (For those of you just joining us, Jessica is Brady’s coworker who gave him a BJ once. Since then she’s been like my arch nemesis, but I honestly forgot all about her).
I had no idea why she would possibly be messaging me, but my first thought was that she wanted to apologize for being a whore. Yeah right.
I opened it and found a picture. Jessica sent me a fucking picture of my boyfriend. It was of him putting his shirt on, but you could see his face and bare torso. It kind of looked like he was standing in front of his bed and the picture was taken by someone laying in the bed. A few hours after she sent the picture she sent a single smiley face.
If I had any doubt what the picture meant, the smiley confirmed it. He was getting dressed and she was laying in the bed. Obviously they had just engaged in some sort of sexual relations. I felt my lunch creeping back up.
For a full minute I couldn’t decide whether I was going to reply to Jessica and ask why the fuck she sent me that picture or if I was going to confront/murder Brady. I stared at the picture and determined that I was not about to give Jessica the satisfaction of knowing she upset me. Brady had to die.
I texted Brady, “Where are you?” while I drove to his house. He replied that he was on his way home and did I need anything? I told him no. I don’t even know what was going through my head. When did this happen? Did they actually have sex? Was the picture even real?
Luckily, I only had to wait a few minutes for Brady to get home after I got there. I met him at the door and I think I said something along the lines of, “Well, look what I received today.”
I shoved my phone in Brady’s face so he could see the message Jessica sent me. He had his laptop bag and keys in his hands and I didn’t give him to opportunity to even put it down.
I watched as Brady looked at my phone, saw the picture, studied it and form a very subtle look of confusion and then alarm. He looked back at me blankly.
“What is this?” I demanded.
Brady stared at me and didn’t say anything.
“What is this?!” I asked again, this time raising my voice even higher.
“It was while we were broken up,” he finally spoke up.
“Did you have sex with her?”
Brady did not break eye contact as he said, “Yes.”
I actually laughed. It was all so ridiculous.
“Seriously? Out of all the women on the planet, you decide to fuck this one? Are you fucking kidding me, Brady? You’re so fucking stupid!”
Normally when I yell at Brady, he looks down and turns red, but he was actually maintaining eye contact with me like he was going to own up to what he did.
“So you broke up with me so you could be free to have sex with this chick?” I asked, holding my phone in his face again.
“No.”
“Tell me exactly what happened.”
“I, uh… She came over one night…after the bar. And it just happened.”
“Did she spend the night?”
Brady looked confused like he didn’t know how to answer that.
“Did she fucking wake up here?” I rephrased.
“Uhh… Yeah.”
“Did you cuddle with her?”
“I can’t remember. No, I don’t think so.”
“Did you use a condom?”
“Of course I did.”
I thought about Jessica being at Brady’s house, in his room and in his bed. I thought about them kissing and whatever else they had to do to before actual intercourse. I thought about her huge tits. Ew. Ew.
“You’re fucking disgusting,” I said and shoved Brady as hard as I could. I expected him to stumble back and drop all of his things and for it all to be very dramatic, but he didn’t budge which pissed me off even more.
He didn’t say anything. He didn’t apologize or try to explain himself at all. He just looked at me.
“If you hooked up with anyone else, I wouldn’t care, but it had to be her. After everything that happened, why would you fucking have sex with her? Of course I would find out!” I screamed.
Brady rubbed his eye with the hand his keys were in and I smacked his keys down and they made a loud clatter as they hit the hard wood. “Say something, you coward.”
“What is there to say? It was incredibly stupid of me to let that happen with her,” Brady finally said.
“I hate you,” I stated and then I left. I stopped by Sephora on my way home and picked up a ton of makeup and perfume to make me feel better. When I got home I had a few texts from Brady.
“I’m sorry. I’m an idiot. This is all my fault and I deserved everything you said.”
“I’m not going to make excuses. It was stupid and selfish. I didn’t intend to hurt you.”
“I completely understand if you never want to talk to me or see me again but please don’t hate me.”
I rolled my eyes. Whatever. Every time he fucked up it was the same spiel. So I ignored him and went to the gym. Two hours later I checked my phone and found more texts.
“I’m sorry for letting that happen. I wasn’t thinking. I shouldn’t have done it and I should have told you right away.”
“I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I love you. I hope you know that.”
I didn’t ever respond to his texts, but I was up all night trying to figure out if I had any right to be mad or not. He said we were broken up when it happened so I guess I really can’t say anything. Especially since I hooked up with someone else too. Jessica though? That’s like a slap in the face. He knows how I feel about her. He had to have known I would find out.
I woke up at around 5:30 and couldn’t go back to sleep so I decided to go see Brady before he went to work. I stopped and got donuts (mostly because I wanted one) then I let myself in.
“Hi,” I said loudly when I walked in. I found Brady walking out of his room into the hallway. He was already completely dressed for work and looked at me cautiously. “I brought donuts!”
“Oh. Thank you,” he said.
I walked to the kitchen and he followed me. As I pulled our donuts out of the bag, I said, “Glazed for you and chocolate sprinkles for me. Are you leaving soon?”
“Maybe in fifteen minutes or so. What are you doing up so early?” Brady asked.
As if he didn’t know I was up all night picturing him having sex with Jessica and wondering what positions they did. I shrugged. “I couldn’t stop thinking about donuts.”
Brady didn’t bring up last night and neither did I because I kind of wanted to forget about it and I kind of just wanted to see how long it would take him to man up and apologize to my face. When it was time for Brady to leave for work, I told him I was going to stay and finish getting ready at his place. He said okay and leaned in to hug and kiss me.
I pushed him away and said, “Don’t kiss me, I don’t know where your lips have been.”
I could tell this kind of hurt his feelings, but he quickly tried not to show it. He said, “Okay.”
So I don’t know. I know I can’t be mad or upset, but I am. I feel betrayed and gross. I think mostly I’m just pissed that Jessica sent me that picture and smiley basically rubbing in my face that they slept together. I guess I kind of asked for it, but still. It’s fucking embarrassing. And I feel like she showed me the picture because she saw how happy Brady and I look in my new profile picture. She obviously just wanted to stir up some drama and while I don’t want to let her do that, she did.
I don’t even know how I feel right now. I feel like Brady doesn’t value our relationship at all. And now I feel like I don’t even want to be with him anymore. But when I think of not being with him I get really sad and want to cry. Like, I miss him so much when I’m not with him. Even now after I found this out. And I don’t want Jessica to think that she can actually break us. I kind of wish I would have never gotten in a relationship. This blows.
hot mess in high heels. 
Oh my god!!! I’m so shocked, like can’t even form words! I can’t imagine how you are feeling right now, poor you 😦 jessica is a skanky butch, what a rotten thing to do.. And now I don’t know how to feel about Brady 😦
I hate her!
Ugh!! I am so angry. I hate Jessica. But I want you and Brady to get married. Can we find a way to retaliate?
how? lol.
This sucks. I’m so sorry Reese. I can’t imagine how you are feeling right now. I can’t believe this happened. I had a feeling though, after what Carly said. I would say this though, if you decide to move on from this, don’t throw it under the rug. An apology isn’t enough, Brady needs to use his words to explain what the fuck he was thinking when he did that. It’s one thing to sleep with someone while you were broken up. But ask him why the fuck it had to be Jessica. Don’t let this slide. He knows how you feel about her. He knows all the drama she stirred. What was he doing hanging out with her after everything that’s happened between you and her? He’s turned you down for sex before so why couldn’t he do it to her? Why did he bring her to his place? How many times did it happen? He has to have known she took that picture. You should make him grovel. Brady has a lot of explaining to do. I agree with you that you don’t want her to think she can break you up. But don’t let him off the hook. This is a good time to really get him to say what he wants out this relationship and if he takes it seriously. No more excuses. Brady needs to sit up.
I know. I have so many questions, but I couldn’t even think last night. I need some time to think and stuff. but don’t worry, I intend to ask everything.
Whoa.
Yes, you should be mad he hooked up with her.
He gave you the reason he did it, he apologized. It was while you were broken up and he didn’t know you’d be getting back together so give him a little break. I’m not saying you should forgive it, but understand where his head was at.
That being said, this opens up an entire dialogue that you can have with him about your relationship moving forward. Make him work for it Reese. Make him open up to you about everything, tell him he needs to prove to you that he values your relationship. Not sharing things with you like the Africa thing etc are red flags. You’re going to need time to decide if you’re still attracted to him after knowing what he’s done. When my ex cheated on me, I lost my cookies when he went to kiss me afterwards because I couldn’t handle thinking of him with someone else (one of my best friends to be exact).
He should delete/block her, allow you access to his phone records or anything else you want to see. I would even ask him that if he’s serious about your relationship, that he look for another job where he is not in a position to deal with her. It’s a respect thing to you. And if he has any thoughts of marrying you in the future, he has to have that respect for you. The “fight for you, keep you first in his life, what’s best for both of us” respect.
I’m so sorry you have to go through this.
You deserve the best and in return, you give your best. He needs to be a better boyfriend Reese – this whole fiasco aside, he needs a reality check that it’s the two of you against the world. Nothing else matters except that you two are committed and in it together.
Lots of love. Hugs from Oregon.
ew yes. I don’t want to touch him at all now after he’s been with her. gross. thanks for the advice! you’re so sweet.
Switching jobs is a little extreme. Reese and Brady were broken up. I think him sleeping with Jessica is a slap in the face and he’s on my shit list too but thats too much IMO.
Not extreme at all. It’s the principle. My husband doesn’t subject me to his exes and doesn’t work with his either.
There’s a difference between husband and boyfriend.
My husband did that while we were dating too. Respect. Brady gets irritated with his job anyways, this is just one more reason to look around.
Totally agree with you, Cynthia. He’s done serious shit, but it was while they were broken up. Going to another job is way to extreme and way to ridiculous to ask.
Reese, you should talk to him, like, for real, you know? You’ve got every right to be annoyed, but don’t freak out, you’re going so great with your attempt to be more mature, don’t throw it all away because of this bitch
I literally feel like throwing up, that’s disgusting! You can’t be mad at him for sleeping with someone while you were broken up since you did as well, but you can sure as hell be mad about who it was! Y’all definitely need to talk about this more but I think it’s really just gonna take some time for you to process the situation first. And you definitely need to call him out on the fact that Miss Blow Job Central is sending you pictures like that, especially after he yelled at you for messaging her. Boy needs to cut all contact with that girl except for work if he wants to fix this, before them being kinda friends was understandable but the fact that this happened draws a line. Give it some time babe, besides he hooked up with her and yet still came running back to you, boy still has his priorities straight:)
omg I know, I can’t imagine what’s going on at his work today. all I know is he better be screaming at her like he screamed at me when I messaged her.
He needs to cut all ties with her. The end. She obviously has ulterior motives. Her sending that photo was in such bad taste. I would totally send some condescending message back to her. Sometimes silence is golden, but I’m not sure I would be able to hold my tongue. I love what Lupita suggested. It’s a dig but not a classless one.
I really feel like I might respond now…
I’ll hold off on responding. It’s tempting to say something back but time has passed and you don’t know if Brafy has confronted her in which case of you say what Luita suggested she’ll know you’re lying. Ignore her. Ignore her existense if you ever see her. Keep your picture up and post more if you like. It will kill her inside. Don’t feed into her toxicity. She’s a troubled thirsty girl
uhhhhh too late.
I know I say this all the time, but our relationships are so similar. It’s kinda getting scary at this point.
My husband dated a girl before me for several years. He and I were friends at that point and I only met her once briefly. They broke up and several years later we started dating. One important detail is that he never had sex with her. She was a virgin and was saving herself. After they broke up she started dating some guy and eventually had sex with him and he cheated on her. That happened around the same time we started dating and the girl was having a ton of regret for not losing it to my husband and instead wasted it on some jackass. She called him a lot while she was dealing with it, but I honestly felt sorry for her and they had known each other their whole lives, so I let it go on. Then she started making some plays for him. She called in the middle of the night, tried to see him, would hang up if I answered the phone, stuff that made it clear she wanted him back and me out of the way. This went on for two years before I found out he saw her and lied to me about it and I said I’m done (he to this day will swear that nothing happened that day), I’m not prepared to be second to anyone I don’t care what they’re going through or how long you’ve known them. Almost immediately he was dating her again. It killed me, it killed me because it was her. Anyone else it wouldn’t have bothered me, but like you said, why did it have to be her?
Eventually he saw the error of his ways and wanted me back and wanted to be rid of her. I can not begin to tell you how hard this was to get over. End of the story is that we got back together, five years later got engaged, and now we’ve been married for two years and I can actually stand to be around that girl occasionally and not want to kill her. If you want more details on what we had to do to get to that point, I’d be happy to share, but my main point is that I do think it’s possible to get past this.
omg. he started dating her after you broke up with him? that’s awful and low. it would be so hard to take him back after that. at least he came crawling back though 🙂
Like Luita said, being with her for those few months made him realize it’s me that he wanted. Don’t think I didn’t make him work for it. We did many of the things people are suggesting, but he was happy to do it if it meant I would take him back.
Brady needs to confront her about that. You were broken up but I completely agree about being upset that it was her. Brady still doesn’t know about you and Kyle, right? I’m proud of you for not throwing that in his face if anything that shows how much you’ve grown up. I think it will be something difficult to get over but I think your relationship with Brady is worth it even if he is emotionally stunted.
I don’t plan on telling him about Kyle. that would make me a hypocrite right?
You both slept with someone else on your break. That’s one thing. It’s WHO he slept with that makes it, in my opinion, so much worse. Effing Jessica.
My 2 cents… Maybe you can’t be mad he hooked up with someone, but you can be mad it was her. She’s desperate. How pathetic that she sent that because she knows you’re happy. Honestly, I think you need to sit on it for a few days and be angry, then decide if you can move on. If you can, then do it and never bring it up again. This whore is so sad, she’s still hanging on to her fantasy of Brady, meanwhile he was desperate to be with you. I don’t think this should be a deal breaker, but I know it would be hard to move on from.
Oh also, I think you need to have a blunt conversation with Brady and explain to him exactly why he cannot speak to her anymore. She is obviously out to sabotage your relationship. He’s so oblivious, he might need that spelled out. I really hope he’s as angry as you are, because he needs to understand the gravity of her being so bold as to send that shit to you. She held on to that in the hopes she could fuck with your mind, she’s been planning that moment. He needs to get that she’s fucking twisted.
Well she said it’s not about him sleeping with someone while they were on break, that it was with her. I completely think that Reese has the right to be upset.
I was in a similar situation while my boo was studying a few hours away (semi long distance). There was a girl that I knew had a thing for him, and I was called crazy because she was married and all. The fighting ensued between us, she tried to confront me after I emailed her hubby, saying she’s bad news. After two years of arguing over how I’m jealous and crazy, guess what, my boo helped her move into a new apartment and she offered him to sleep with her. Lucky me that my boo is amazing turned her down, completely cut her out of her life.
My point is, even if my boo slept with her I’d go apeshit because she always sized me up, any other girls I’d be pissed but its a different situation. And like you said Reese, the secret ALWAYS comes out. typically a homewrecker like Jessica, would love to take pride of her “accomplishment”. I also agree with a few comments above, its your choice, you clearly love him. But you need to either have a serious conversation with him…prehpas in a public place and after the talk you need to go back to your place, to give him the time to process and no excuse to have sex.
eww, he helped her move and she offered up the goods? why are girls so desp????? I can’t handle this.
true. if he didn’t know she was crazy before he has to know now! fucking psycho.
Oh yeah, and you won’t believe this, after the incident he of course cut ties, but I kept snooping. Turns out she separated from her hubby and within a year, she got married again and had a baby. Once I saw she’s preggos I had to tell my boo, to prove a point, that most likely that would have been is baby.
But again, were always the crazy jealous girlfriends, its never the innocent home wreckers..
To get back a Jessica you need to pretend that she didn’t hurt you. I’m a bitch so I would say something mean to her like “yeah Brady and I talked about it and be told me that sleeping with you is what helped him decide he wanted me back in his life, so I guess I should thank you?”
Brady is an idiot for letting her into his bed! And yes you probably shouldn’t be as mad as you are because you also did stuff while broken up with him. But you didn’t sleep with someone that hates him and is in love with you, so situations are a little different. And at least Kyle is not permanently in your life.
I suggest you talk to him and tell him exactly how you are feeling and don’t let him off the hook, he has to open up to you. I’m tired of his “ok’s”, he needs to tell you what he’s thinking! Hahaha I know, I know not my life, but I would tell you that if you were my friend in real life.
I feel like you are the only one in the relationship that is trying to be better, he talks about you guys having issues, but does he do anything to improve? I don’t see him opening up to you.
I’m sorry this is happening to you, Jessica is a bitch! Do you still have her naked pictures? You could post them…. Hahaha no don’t do that. Karma is a bigger bitch and she’ll get what she deserves.
I love your response to Jessica. That girl reeks of desperation. Rise above, Reese, rise above!
lol you’re so perfect luita.
She doesn’t have to POST the pictures… she could just send one. This way she knows Reese knows what a skank she is. ☺
I just remembered something. Didn’t you find a blonde hair in his bed?
YES.
and everyone told me to calm down and forget about it because it was mine. I knew that thin yellow hair wasn’t mine!!!!
I have never commented before and I have to say you have really grown since you started this blog. I get why your hurt cause of who he slept with but you can’t be mad he didn’t tell you cause you didn’t tell him about who you slept with while you were broken up. I don’t think you have a right to be mad at him – hurt by who he slept with yes but not mad that he slept with someone. In my opinion I would just try to forget it and move one. I mean he admitted he was drunk and from the sounds of that slut I am sure she took total advantage of the situation.
okay, true. I’m definitely mad though because he should have known better than to hook up with HER.
I straight up want to cut this Jessica bitch. Seriously. What a disgusting whore. The fact that she actually 1) creeped and snuck a picture of Brady post-sex for what I can only assume was for blackmail or something and 2) Sent the picture to Reese to cause a rift in their relationship is just… UHG. What a fucking troll!!!!!
I seriously would have a hard time moving past this, as well. I get that you guys were broken up. Yeah, OK. But with HER? Seriously? Does he even have a brain?! In my opinion, he is just as disgusting as her for proving YOU right about Jessica’s intentions all along. I hate the fact that Jessica is seriously having this kind of control on your (…and MY ;)) emotions about your relationship and I want you to get past it almost to spite the stupid whore (which is probs not a good thing). lol but this is gonna be a toughy. Make him work for it. Big time.
what a fucking slut!!!!
This is a little weird, but I would totally post the photo to your Facebook, claiming you took it yourself. Just a “he’s so cute in the morning!” sort of thing. She thinks she has some stupid power over you? Throw it back at her. Every knows he’s with YOU, she’s nothing. And then if she every tries to show off the photo, it’ll look like she stole it from you. She’ll look as stalkery as she is.
Love that! I honestly want to get back at this girl. Usually I’m the type to ignore someone and get to them that way, but Jessica has my blood boiling. Reese, I honestly feel really bad for you. I want her to see she doesn’t matter but also don’t want her to feel like she got away with something. I suppose you and Brady need to talk first. Then, though, I would totally do SOMETHING. ANYTHING. Just don’t do it drunk. Be coherent and confident in your retaliation. Let it simmer first. Revenge is a dish best served cold.
What a fucking bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMFG.
You know what, though? Don’t make it seem like it bothered you. You cannot give her that satisfaction. Smile and wave like the Penguins. And I’ll fucking hunt her down and shoot her. I swear I will.
I know how you feel. You and Brady need to talk and make sure you’re on the same page. Send him to Mexico. Maybe he’ll stop acting like a buttface.
I haven’t commented for a while but this is infuckingsane. I love Brady but he needs some reality check. You’re too good to be tossed around like this. He needs to beg on his knees for you.
As for Jessica, I would probably send her something “omg isn’t my boyfriend so hot” or a pic of him naked and be like “that ones cute but I like this one better” and dismiss the fact that she slept with him.
So gross. Ew.
Cosign. Love this!
Please do not give that fucking bitch the satisfaction of you replying. What a fugly slut.
Also I agree with what I think is the general consensus above. Id be mad because of course it had to be Jessica. Make Brady explain his shit and work for it. That’s fucking disgusting. Out of literally all the people in the world…
Now that I’ve calmed down a little, let me play devil’s advocate. Men don’t think like we do, he didn’t consider Jessica being your nemesis when he slept with her. He just saw her as someone that was available and willing that’s all he saw. How sad is it that she had to get him drunk to get him to bed? I used to hang out with all guys in high school and boys are disgusting, they really don’t care who the girl is as long as she’s opening her legs for them (my friend’s words). Of course that goes for one-night stands and such, not for relationships.
At least now you know that he is with you because he really loves you not because he couldn’t get another girl.
I’m not saying this so you’ll forgive him right away, I still think you need to make him talk, but when you are talking try to put yourself in his shoes he thought you hated him and didn’t want him back. I don’t think you have to tell him about Kyle, but you could ask him if he wants to know about what you did while you were broken up. Something tells me Carly might’ve said something to him while you guys were fighting. So that way he doesn’t think you are being a hypocrite.
I like the idea of you posting the pic Jessica sent you on your wall, hahahaha. It would drive her crazy! But yeah do it after you talk to Brady. And you might need to spell it out to him and make him see that Jessica is a vindictive bitch and he really needs to stop talking to her.
I don’t even know if I could be mad about who he slept with. If Jessica knew you were broken up, I’m sure she pursued him relentlessly. And Brady isn’t exactly a guy with a backbone. I think he would have just let it happen instead of thinking “oh Reese and I might get back together even though we haven’t even spoken so I shouldn’t do this.” But I would definitely be furious at Jessica for sending the picture, and I would expect Brady to be furious too. There is no need for her to throw a 1-time hookup in which Brady was not cheating on you in your face. He should definitely cut all contact with her.
I’m not trying to be super negative right now but gotta get this off of my chest. I’ve had a bad feeling about Brady ever since you guys broke up. The way he handled the situation and the fact that he didn’t even attempt to contact you were both red flags for me. Now this comes to light? I don’t think Brady is as innocent or “clueless” as we make him out to be.
Am I the only one who thinks her taking a picture is weird? What a stalker, that bitch be desparate. Do you access to the slutty pictures that she sent to Brady way back when? I would send one of those back to her and say “Thirsty much?” And don’t forget the smiley face
yes it’s so weird. obviously she took a picture just to have something to throw in my face later. she’s crazier than I thought. and I think I still have the pictures, but I might have deleted them! I’ll have to check!!
I like this idea. Jessica’s so desperate, I’m embarrassed for her.
Ooohhh! I read this after I posted. Yes! Send her her own picture!
I was saying the same thing on the last post!! I honestly can’t stand Brady. He’s a spineless coward. It bothers me that he can’t even be a man. But I guess I should be glad that he isn’t my boyfriend because I’d probably chew him up and spit him out haha.
Reese I’m standing by what I said on the last post. You deserve so much better.
I don’t why but this comment made me laugh.
I haven’t even read the other comments yet, so I’m sorry if this is a repeat. I think you have every right to feel hurt and sad. That’s only natural. You were broken up though, and it didn’t look like you were getting back together, so Brady was free to do any level of stupidity he needed to in order to cope with what he was going through. It sucks ass that it was with Jessica. What I really think this all amounts to is how Brady chooses to handle this current Jessica situation. She had no other intent of sending that picture than to be a big ol bitch. She has no respect for you or your relationship with Brady. If it were me, I would not be able to be continue a relationship with Brady if he didn’t directly address Jessica and her inappropriateness. She needs to know where he stands and he needs to end all communication. She is toxic. If Brady can’t see that or respect you enough to stand up to her, then walk away.
YASSS. This is gold.
Also. I really don’t think you should tell Brady how to resolve this. Let him know that you need him to figure this one out and make it right. This is honestly a no-brainier. You don’t want to have to tell him how to navigate these things the rest of his life. You want to be with someone who has the same core values as you. As hard as it might be, hold off see what he comes up with on his own. Don’t respond to Jessica. She’s not worth it. And honestly, I know it hurts so badly that it was HER that he slept with. But we all do stupid stupid things when we’re hurting or in a bad place in life in hopes that we’ll feel better. So don’t hang on to that for too long. I guarantee it meant nothing.
I think that’s a great idea. I’m trying to stop controlling him anyway so I will just see what he does and if he even talks to her.
I’m so mad!! I think you guys really need to talk even though it’s awkward and upsetting. Sometimes you need to get down to ground zero before you can build back up and be stronger. And I’m not sure you guys ever had that conversation even though you’re back together. I wouldn’t be able to stop seeing that stupid bitch’s face unless he totally convinced me that he’s not interested and is 100% invested in our future. Having said that I think you should both fight for this Reese you obviously love each other it would be silly to let it go because you both find it hard to talk about what you need to take things to the next level.
Hope you’re doing ok x
I completely understand the hurt and anger. If it were me though, I would have thought up a hundred different ways to respond to Jessica by now and on impulse, I probably would have sent the worst possible one and sent it. I hope that you had better luck on that one! What did you reply with?
I’ve never really commented before but on this one I really wanted to. I think that Brady really does love you and the way he was raised, he might not show it how you imagine it should be. I think he is sorry and he does know why this bothers you so much.
Just talk through it. Make a list of you need to. What points you want to address. “I’m not MAD that you slept with SOMEONE. I’m HURT that you slept with HER.” Something ike that. Idk.
I really hope I did NOT come across as some lecturing advisor or something. Lol I just wanted to help by giving some outside observations..
Love this. Especially the emphasis on hurt. That’s one thing I’ve always brought to the table in arguments. Mad is one thing. Mad is temporary and fleeting and something you can fix very easily. On the other hand Hurting someone in a relationship is breaking their trust and truly not taking them into consideration when they should be high on the priority list. Hurting someone you love should make you feel 1000x worse than making them angry. It should make you want to repent and do whatever you can to mend the hurt
I know this has nothing to do with me but reading this post literally knocked the wind out of me and made me so sad. LOL. It reminds me of a situation that occurred when I was dating my ex-boyfriend. It kind of made all those old feelings come back.
Anyway, I think you’ve handled this AWESOME so far. I know you said that you’ve responded to Jessica and there is a special place in Hell for bitches like that. It’s so sad how insecure they are. That’s what my ex-boyfriend didn’t understand. I hated this girl that he was friends with because she was like Jessica. He hooked up with plenty of people after we broke up (because he’s disgusting – but that’s another point haha) but she was the only one that bothered me. UGH. I just hate those women!
Love you! x0
Caroline
I’m sorry 😦 honestly, it’s up to him to make this better. If he can take appropriate steps to let Jessica know he’s not fucking interested in her and she was equivalent to a rando he used bc he was upset over your breakup, then see if you can make it work. If he does his whole clueless thing and acts like he doesn’t know what to do or how to handle this and doesn’t care about making you feel better, it’s not worth it. My heart literally twisted in my chest when I read this, because I know how it feels to be so sure of your feelings and your relationship, only to have it all be pulled out from under you. I would’ve felt like a fool. Brady should have told you earlier. You’re making a ton of strides lately in maturity, so now it’s time for Brady to put some effort in too.
Wow what a total bitch! I agree Brady should cut off all ties with her. The vindictive side of me says that if you and Brady get engaged you should Facebook her a picture of the ring and say “checkmate bitch” probably not the right thing to do though 🙂
The thing that galls me is that men are so fucking stupid and insecure, they don’t realize what a bad idea it is to sleep with crazy like that. You don’t have a right to be mad that he slept someone while you were broken up, but you definitely have a right to be mad that it was HER. He told you that he’d never talk to her again, before, right (‘no mores jessicas’ or something like that)? So how did she wind up at his house after the bar? I have a really hard time imagining that he randomly texted her out of the blue after months and months of ignoring her and not speaking to her and that she jumped on the first chance.
I also think it was extremely fucking weird that she took a photo in the first place of him in a recognizable place. It was like she had the idea about wanting to show you while it was happening, which means she tried to manipulate him just like she’s manipulating you. She’s desperate and sad, but also knows how to get under your skin and doesn’t care that sending you that pic will make Brady not talk to her anymore. Maybe she thought something was going to happen after they hooked up?
love you xo
totally agreed. he probably never stopped talking to her!
Why are we constantly blaming Jessica and not holding Brady accountable. He’s a grown man and should have known better. Didn’t Reese tell him not to interact with Jessica anymore because she was uncomfortable with that? Reese’s issue should be with Brady’s blatant disrespect. Methinks Brady never stopped speaking with Jessica. Also think Brady isn’t as clueless as he acts. He’s clever and knows what he’s doing. Reese you deserve better. Brady’s action shows that he doesn’t respect you in my opinion. Instead of trying to get back at Jessica and calling her name realize that Brady wasn’t coerced into anything. He was a willing participant and shouldn’t be let off the hook so easily.
They were broken up so Brady was free to do what he wants. I think we’re mad at Jessica for bring slimy and sending Reese the picture to hurt her
Yes they were broken up but if Brady had an ounce of respect and loved Reese as much as he claims he wouldn’t have gone near Jessica. He knew how she felt about Jessica and can’t feign innocence. Point is I think Brady is manipulative and quite clever. He plays dumb to gain sympathy but knows damn well what he’s going. Jessica may have inadvertently helped Reese see what type of man Brady is. Who’s to say that Brady and Jessica haven’t been hooking up for a while? None of us know and Brady has a knack for acting dumb. He has that down pact.
we are holding Brady accountable. he sucks for doing it but she sucks even more for taking the picture. she’s fucking weird. but believe me, Brady is not off the hook.
The feud between Reese and Jessica was Reese’s doing. Had she never messaged her this may not be happening. (Let the insults fly!!!!)
maybe.
So Reese poked the bear. But what kind of woman just has sex with someone to get back at a girl? I respect myself way too much to do that. And to take a pic and then wait that long to show it? She sounds like a psycho! She just needs to get a life and stop worrying so much about Reese & Brady.
What makes us think that Brady and Jessica didn’t just run into each other at a bar or that it was an outing with co-workers?
I still believe in innocent until proven guilty. Just talk to Brady and make him tell you everything and tell him that him not telling you things just lets your imagination run wild and picture worst case scenario.
Luita so we’re pinning all this on Jessica and giving Brady an out? What type of woman excuses the mans actions and automatically assumes the evil woman must have seduced and taken advantage of him. Brady should be accountable for his actions and you blaming Jessica completely makes it seem like he was an unwilling participant.
I’m personally not pinning everything on Jessica but she was obviously being spiteful by taking a picture and showing it to me. Brady isn’t off the hook at all, don’t worry.
I thought we were talking about the feud going on between Jessica & Reese. Because that’s Jessica’s excuse for sleeping with Brady.
None of us know what happened so to automatically hold one party responsible is wrong. Who’s to say that she and Brady haven’t been having a friends with benefits thing for a while? Yes sending the picture to Reese was low and very wrong. No doubt about it. Brady has this way of pretending to be clueless and unaware that rubs me the wrong way.
I mean obviously that’s a possibility.
she is trash. did you talk to him yet? what did write back to Jessica?
omg if you were engaged it’d be so perfect timing like “suck it bitch”
Brady sucks for hooking up with her tho, and he better have yelled at her a million times worse than he yelled at you.
I wish you could get her fired (so Brady doesn’t have to switch job) but well haha
ew. this jessica girl is so desperate. i’m glad you didn’t give her the satisfaction of even replying to her! i’m so proud that you went straight to brady instead; your anger was not misdirected.
I agree that you and brady need to have an open, honest conversation about your relationship and where it’s headed. he can’t just say sorry and have y’all move on this time. and on a side note, he can’t just blurt out marriage proposals and then act like nothing ever happened after, especially if he’s said multiple times that he doesn’t think y’all are ready yet.
Oh my god!!!! Thos post mafe me so angry for you! My heart was beating out of my chest was so furious for you!
I would go bat shit insane on my boyfriend!!
Yoh deserve someone respectful, he clearly doesnt at all, to have done that. It doesnt matter if you slept with someone too, but its the principle you didnt sleep with his roommate or anyone he knows.
Take that nasty bitches pictures you had from Brady’s phone and post an add on craigslist with the hyper link to her facebook and put that bitch up for sale. Men seeking women add or something. You need to show her ho tf she messed with. Then message her with a simple smiley face after its done and watch everything underneath her just fall apart. She wont know what to do!!
I hope you do it. I am so serious!!!
ahhhhh thats so grimy. pull up to his job and violate that girl and then him. she’s mad stank and so is he for doing that. just say bye Felicia like you’re young do you’re thing with someone who isn’t lowkey shady. be an independent women and slay all them hoes
So, I agree that it makes sense to be mad about who it is, but that he probably was not thinking about that. But I think you showing up at his house with donuts, but then telling him not to kiss you is SO confusing. Just showing up and going about your day might make him think that things are fine and it’s safer to leave it be, when that’s not the case at all. I think that makes it really hard for him to figure out what you want from him.
I know. 😦 I don’t even know why I went over there. he knows we need to talk though.
I am sure others have said the same things I am about to say, but I am honestly too lazy to read through the comments.
First, the hard part: you hooked up with Kyle during the same time period. So factor that into whether and how mad you really are at Brady. You did the same thing, Sister. I remember Brady was weirded out at Thanksgiving about you and him–enough to ask Carly about it, so really, a mild version of you Jessica aversion. (Mild because he did not approach Brady about what happened.) Also, Brady does not know you hooked up with someone else at this point, so this is a very uneven playing field. Personally, since this has come out, it might be time to tell Brady about it. Can you imagine how he would feel if you flip shit here, and then he finds out later about Kyle? Not good. This will take careful thought, on how to discuss this, but if you really want to move past all this, you need to get everything out into the open.
Jessica is a straight up C*** for sending you that picture. She is totally toxic. It was done out of pure malice. Brady needs to block her on Facebook completely because she is cyber stalking you. Not him, you, because it was your profile this was posted on and she is obviously keeping tabs on you. Who the hell knows what else she might cook up? I agree that in hindsight, you talked about things that happened–Carly’s comment and the blond hair you found at Brady’s–that made you suspicious, but you let them go. Well, the shit has hit the fan.
My opinion is you have a right to be mad/disturbed that Jessica approached you this way. She needs to leave you alone and Brady needs to protect you from her, since he has put you in this position. As for the hookup itself, since you did the same thing, try and think of your state of mind when it happened, Brady probably was in the same state–hurting,drunk and vulnerable. Jessica is a predator and she caught him in a moment of weakness. I would be more down on Brady for what he did with Jessica. except for you doing the same with Kyle. Your breakup period has become a metaphorical Las Vegas–what happened then, was then and not now and should all stay in the past.
This situation, however, is a turning point. Brady is simply not talking to you about really important stuff. Nothing has changed in his level of communication. He was contemplating going to Africa, FFS and you found out because his mom said something. That is seriously not cool. How serious IS he about your relationship? If he is serious, he needs to start opening up because if he doesn’t he will lose you. I say this because I can hear it in your narrative voice in the last few weeks of posting. I sense your frustration at being left in the dark by him and it is not sustainable. It’s obvious you love him, and he says he loves you over and over again, but now is the time to really talk, especially for Brady to start talking to you. I am not advocating anything drastic, but Brady’s lack of opening up is creating a crisis point. I see this when you say you feel undervalued and ignored, which is the general feeling I hear from your posts lately.
The one thing that MUST happen is that Jessica needs to go away–as close to literally as possible. Blocked, deleted and cut off. I would not talk to her if I were you; she is evil and it will simply fuel her to keep going. I doubt either you or even Brady talking to her will do any good. If, God forbid, you meet her, blank her. Say nothing and act as if she is invisible.
I know my comment is probably overlong, but you know I tend to write a lot when I am fired up and I really feel for you. This must have blindsided you and it was an act of utter evil just to cause trouble by Jessica and I abhor that in people, so it got me going. Hang in there, Reese!
This and all of this.
Wow shocked that your pissed when you did the same thing. What if Kyle too a pic of you? Brady needs to let her know it is inappropriate however you did the same thing to your friend. I hope he finds out about your little romp and that he came over after you and b were back together. Pot calling kettle black. It sucks she was able to throw the pic back in your face but it was nine of your business. Remember your comment about two post ago about wanting to be pregnant. Yup great idea. Hope you didn’t catch anything from your stupidity and not taking the appropriate precautions.
Don’t be a meany head
Reese I’m angry for you, not because Brady hooked up with someone when you broken up but because that someone was Jessica. He swore he would stop all communication with her and then he runs to her? Something doesn’t make sense to me. I mean, what women (even the most desperate) would give up her self respect to meet up with a man that’s ignored her for months. Maybe they were still speaking all these months? Jessica sending you that pic was malicious and served no other purpose than to get under your skin. Regarding him saying he used a condom (yes I know women carry them in their purses just in case), I might be mistaken but didn’t you and him stop using condoms? If so, where would he get one so quickly? I apologize if I’m jumping to conclusions…pregnancy brain;-)
Anyway I think Brady needs to realize that hooking up with Jessica was hurtful and spiteful on his part. He needs to decide whether you’re important enough for him to cut ties with her. That said he needs to improve his communication skills and become more forthcoming. It would drive me nuts if my significant other acted so clueless all the time. Plus, he’s always apologizing and saying the same thing. Now is the time for you lay down the ground rules for your relationship. You’re absolutely fabulous and have grown immensely since you started blogging, and not only that you’re aware of your actions and try to be better. I’m very proud of you;-)
You need to tell Brady what you expect in this relationship – honesty, open communication, trust, etc. He needs to put you first and prove to you that he loves and respects you by his actions. I know some comments are saying you did the same with Kyle. I disagree. Brady’s actions were malicious and he doesn’t seem to have much remorse. Reese went through many emotions and genuinely realized that being with Kyle was a wrong choice. I don’t think Brady is there. You’re a wonderful, strong, witty, caring, successful woman and you deserve a man that will make you shine and love and respect you unconditionally. Only you can decide if Brady is worth all this or if you’re better off taking time for you and continue your search for Mr. Right. Regardless of what you decide, I’m rooting for you because I know that you deserve the best:-)
that’s a good point
Ahhhh wtf!!!! I seriously want to hurt this bitch and I don’t even know you! I think the best revenge is logging into Brady’s facebook and writing her a message like “I was so distraught and almost suicidal over my break up with Reese that I turned to the biggest whore I knew. Your crazy nature and disgusting body have made me realize I need to marry reese” lol I’m immature but I hateeeee herrrrr
I think you definitely have a right to be mad … more than mad. I would have reacted the same way. She is the last person he should have hooked up with, especially given how he handled your break-up, as well as how he handled your issues with HER before. Her sending you that pic just confirms that everything you have felt about her is justified, and I don’t think Brady has ever really valued your feelings when it comes to her.
Your feelings are justified; I still wouldn’t have given him the time of day and I hate to say it but this would be pretty hard for me to move past (just based on everything you have written in your blog about her and him so far). I hope you’re feeling better
I’m having a huge disconnect here. IF the hookup happened while they were broken up she would have had no reason to take the picture and she wouldn’t have just because she is weird. If she wanted a pic because she is weird it would have had her in it. I GUARANTEE she took that picture with the intent of rubbing it in your face and that the hook up was recent. If she took it while you were broken up she would have sent it at that time for a look what I have. She hasn’t been sitting on that picture this whole time in case you two got back together. That pic was taken after you two have been back together. I think Brady is cheating on you with her and playing you both. Hence why he was soooo very upset over you contacting her and came unglued on you about it. That kind of anger comes from him trying to protect her and not you. In the end it’s your decision but seriously you need to step back and look at the facts against what human behavior dictates. Jessica can’t stand you and wouldn’t be patient enough to hold that picture for any amount of time when she knew how much it would hurt you. If you have any IT friends see if one of them can uncover the date and time step that is embedded in all photos a cell phone takes. And do some more digging. Don’t make the mistake of taking what Brady says at face value. Find the truth for yourself.
One more thing that bothers me is all if his texts to you talk about the hookup in the presence sense not the past. He talks as if it just happened. That to me is a slip up on Brady’s part and shows what the truth is. He said “I should have told you as soon as it happened” versus I should have told you as soon as we got back together. He wouldn’t have had a reason to tell you as soon as it happened if you were in fact broken up and not speaking. Its those kind of slip ups that help uncover the lies…… He’s lying to you. I’ve been in a similar situation before and it’s those verbal slip ups that helped me catch the cheater.
omg… this is so true. I didn’t even catch that! 😰
Ok a few others things after I read your post again. Him not replying right away to your questions his classic lying skills. The liar needs a minute to construct the story hence the pause. Nobody needs a minute to tell the truth. The truth is always readily available and all the eye contact during your confrontation is another classic liar skill. Maintaining eye contact is a way for the lair to build trust and seem believable. Especially if he didn’t blink much or at all during.
Either you are going to let it go and move forward with your relationship or hold on to the situation and resent him. You can’t have it both ways. If you try to hold on to it and him, he’ll pull away from you. You can only throw his faults in his face for so long, before he starts using your faults as an excuse to mistreat you. If you need time to get over it that’s your right and you should take it. Don’t tell him you forgive him for something if you can’t. It will make you miserable and have both of you questioning your relationship. Your feelings are valid and important, don’t behave erratically with him (crying spells, throwing things, stalking him). That will only give him an excuse to justify his behavior to himself. Nobody is perfect. He has his faults, you have yours. You have to come to terms with your true issue in this relationship. Is it “her” or is it his deception/disrespect?Think about it, 2 women have been able to meddle in your relationship because he doesn’t set boundaries. You should never have to defend your position in his life to anyone, especially him! I’ve been reading your blog for a while and I think you’ve grown a lot. I’m just offering some advice I wish I would have gotten a few years ago.
Did he not wash the sheets after, cause you found that hair!?? I almost cried reading this, i feel so bad for you! If your breakup was over something legitimate than maybe you would have to be less mad but the breakup was ridiculous without any real reasons.. personally i would make her life a living hell cause its one thing to be a slut, its her body whatever but she a little fn hoe, but like others said the high roaf is probably a better idea, but still make brady beg!
ew I don’t know. I don’t know exactly when it happened but Brady is not the kind of guy to leave gross sheets on his bed for weeks and weeks. he’s like a neat freak. so now it’s seeming more and more like its recent.
FRIG. I’m so mad! What a bitch.
Jessica needs to be put in her place. I feel like I would slap the shit out of her. Brady needs to cut her off. Like, she’s so vicious and pathetic.
my fiancé caught me reading and said you shouldn’t be mad because of the whole Kyle thing but I still think it’s different!
I thought the same thing about the sheets tho did he not wash them after Jessica or something or how was her hair still there?? maybe time for him to confess..
you need to find out if he is cheating on you!! I wouldn’t have thought so but the more I read about the comments the more I wonder!
also I dunno her and why she’d have such low selfsteem to be chasing after Brady for soo long after “only 1 bj”, like what’s his dick made of? he’s probably been leading her on all this time (just so she doesn’t get over him) for “special” occasions (ie when you broke up)
I’ve been rooting for you guys but he seems shady right now! I hope you get to the bottom of this
I mean your fiancé might be right. I DID hook up with someone else while we were broken up so I can’t get mad at Brady for that. but now the question is if he’s been hooking up with her after we got back together or never stopped talking to her.
Jessica is a damn ho bag. She is such a desperate freak! Seriously though, think about what a sad human being (f you could even call her that) she is. She needs to fuck right off and get a life. You deserve happiness and an honest, ballsy bf that wants to make it right. This needs to be the final wake up call for him. He was supposed to not talk to her. And trust you that she was thirsty. I would be pissed too. Yes it is fair that you feel angry. He should use his brain. It reminds me a bit of that crazy bitch friend who had a go at you, when you saw that she was messaging him. It seems that he isn’t discouraging them/putting them straight. If this was reversed, he would be so mad at you! He could have acknowledged that she acted like a bitch. What she did was actually more than bitchy. Who wants to wreck a relationship like that?
Please Reese remember that you deserve so much good in your life and to be spoiled. The bare essentials are for Brady to man up and tell her off and cut her off.he needs to do right by you. Which he isnt right now.
Read all the comments, all good advice about your relationship part.
My 2 cents on a personal part that you can do for yourself.
Block Jessica from ALL of your personal social media and phone.
So there is no way she can contact you personally.
I understand our society’s need to brag about our lives ect. But you “won”, there’s no reason to stoop to her level and keep her in the loop of your life/relationship.
I have a blocked list longer than my arm, due to the fact that there is certain ppl from my past that do not need to know my current life updates.
Including ppl from my church ect. It sounds harsh but you have to protect yourself from unnecessary drama.
think about it for a sec
If you originally had blocked her the second you started to have trouble with her, there would be a lot less drama present day.
Again, this is just something for You personally.
Everybody already covered the relationship part stuff
Seriuosly, WHAT do you see in this guy? He’s like a girl, desperate for attention and sleeping with JESSICA after you break up because she was THERE? You’re in Chicago, there are literally millions of women. Someone needs to find his cajones.
I honestly don’t even know.
Wow. Unfortunately I am not like all these insightful people who comment with the best advice. But my jaw was on the floor when I read this post. Disgusting. Like someone said, there are millions of other women he could have slept with that meant nothing to him or you, but he picked the one who tries to fuck with your relationship?! He’s an idiot and as much cute shit he does for you, it seems like he does an equal amount of really dumb shit. Jessica sounds like a parana and as soon as something goes bad she will probably try to be all over Brady again. I don’t think its worth it to stay in the realtionship, but if you do then Brady needs to know that Jessica is 100% off limits, like he needs to switch jobs to be away from her. Also, someone said block jessica on all social media, and god forbid this happens again and she has no way to try to be spiteful and show you? Brady sure isn’t going to come tell you on his own.
i cant even read all of these comments. slash her tires and poison her dog. fucking crazy ass skank!
Animal lover here
Tires totally agree
Dog, steal it and have it fall in love with you more than it was with her, no poison please. 😢