sunday funday.

Preston got a complimentary table in VIP at a new nightclub on Sunday night so we used that as an excuse to indulge in some Sunday Funday shenanigans. We all met at my place to get ready and I decided to wear a lace Free People bodycon dress, Jimmy Choos and sexed up beach waves. Very boho chic. We took a shot of vodka and toasted to a good night before we cabbed to the club. 

When we got to the club, we ordered a bottle of Patron and a bottle Belvedere to celebrate the fact that it was Sunday. This quickly turned into Carly and me twerking on the table and fighting off random guys. Sorry, we party. Preston ended up finding a guy from Grindr who hung out with us and quickly became my second favorite gay ever (he told me I looked “tiny” and “seductive” so he won points with me).

After a while, Carly and I wanted to mingle with other people in VIP and get a cocktail so we grabbed our friends and made our way to the bar. I ordered a Long Island and took a look around the VIP area. There were eight tables total – all filled with attractive club goers – and then leather couches lining the wall. 

I was drunk, but totally coherent and I thought I saw Eric sitting in the corner on one of the couches with his arm around a girl. I squinted to help me see better. No way it could be him. Out of all the clubs in Chicago, what were the chances of us ending up at the same place?

“Reese, is that Eric?” Kendra asked, as if reading my mind. 

He started laughing and I detected his perfect smile and dimples. It was totally him. Before anyone could stop me, I sat my glass down and started over there.

“Reese! Don’t go over there!” Kendra called after me, but it was too late.

I stopped in front of Eric and his new skank – a half Asian looking girl with played out ombré highlights, a gigantic forehead and a tight red dress. They both looked up at me.

“Oh hey, Eric! I haven’t heard from you in so long I assumed you were dead!” I said, sweetly. 

He let out a chuckle without removing his arm from around the girl. “Hi Reese. This is Brooke.”

I gave the girl a sarcastic smile. “Cute dress. H&M 2012?”

She looked down at herself and back up at me. “I can’t remember.”

“Anyways, I hope you guys have a super fun fucking night,” I said and walked away.

“What did he say?” Kendra wanted to know when I rejoined them at the bar. 

“Did you see that girl? She looks like she belongs in Splice,” I said and finished my drink.

“You’re definitely prettier,” Preston reassured me. “Let’s get you another drink.”

We went back to our table and danced while I pretended Eric didn’t exist. I had to force myself not to look back over at him and what’s-her-face, but luckily I was having too much fun to care.

Later on, I dragged Kendra back to the bar so I could get another drink and an ice water. While I was waiting for the winking bartender to serve up my drink, I felt someone’s hands on my waist.

It was Eric.

I looked past him to see if that tacky haired bimbo was behind him and glared at him when I saw that he was alone.

“Hey beautiful. What are you drinking?” he asked when the bartender slid my cup in front of me. 

“Who the fuck was that?” I asked. 

“Reese, relax. She’s my friend,” Eric said. 

“Well, she’s ugly,” I said as I took a sip of my third Long Island. This wasn’t entirely true. The girl was actually cute, but that wasn’t the point.

Eric gave me a disapproving frown. “That’s uncalled for. Brooke didn’t do anything to you.”

I ignored him and turned back to Kendra. I felt Eric tighten his grip on my waist and nuzzle my neck. Kendra gave me a weird look and buried her face in her drink.

“Come on, Reesie. You aren’t mad at me, are you?” Eric whispered in my ear.

His breath on my ear made my heart rate quicken. I definitely missed him, but he had gone AWOL and completely ignored my phone call. He kissed my neck and I felt my knees buckle. Asshole. He knows that’s my spot. 

“Ken Ken! Reesie Cup!” Preston called, joining us at the bar. “We’re about to get out of here and get something greasy and disgusting to eat. Ready?”

I pulled away from Eric reluctantly, but he held onto my wrist.

“Let’s go,” I said to my friends.

Kendra and Preston started settling our tab with the bartender and Eric pulled me close to him. “Come over.” 

I shook him off. “No. I haven’t even heard from you in like two weeks.”

Eric grabbed my ass. “Come on, Reese. I’ve been busy. I missed you a lot.”

I didn’t know if this was true or not, but somehow he talked me into going home with him. We ended up having the most intense, mind blowing sex ever. There was tons of hair pulling, scratching, ass slapping and dirty talk. It made me think we needed to take a hiatus more often. 

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drunk reese strikes again.

On Friday night, Kendra, Preston, Carly and I went to a party at Preston’s boss’s – a cute high rise with scenic city views. It was an intimate little soirée and we had lots of champagne and vodka cranberries. We left at around 10:00 and weren’t ready to stop partying yet so we walked to a strip of bars a few blocks away. 

Preston bought us a round of Patron shots and as soon as I took it, I knew it was going to be one of those nights. We had another round of Patron, danced, took a few of pictures for Instagram, took a parting Patron shot and headed to the next bar. There, I ordered a vodka water. Vodka waters are a sign of desperation and they’re all I drank in college. The fact that I was indulging in vodka waters in my post-grad life was not a good sign. 

At some point, our group had gotten separated so Carly and I worked the bar – flirting with guys and getting free drinks until last call. 

We went outside to find our friends and I finally pulled my phone out of my Rebecca Minkoff clutch (I still had it in my possession. Small victories). I had several missed calls from Preston and Kendra and a text from Eric.

“Come over?” The timestamp said 10:22 PM. It was now 3:38 AM. 

I sat down on the curb (in my white Hudson jeans, ugh) and called Eric. He didn’t pick up and I figured he was probably sleeping.

“Reesie, Kendra says they’re coming out of the bar now. Do you want to get pizza?” Carly asked, drunkly. 

I ignored her and tried Eric again. So what if he was sleeping? Drunk Reese wanted to see him. He didn’t answer and I tried again right away. He finally picked up. 

“Yes?” He definitely sounded like he’d been sleeping. 

“Hey it’s me!” Drunk Reese exclaimed into the phone.

“Dammit Reese! It’s almost 4:00 in the morning!” Eric yelled. 

“I know, but I thought you wanted me to come over,” I said innocently.

“Hours ago. I’m fucking sleeping,” he grumbled into the phone.

“Wow, okay. I thought you wanted to hang out.” I felt the hot tears forming. Drunk Reese doesn’t like being yelled at. Sober Reese would have shouted back, hung up and never talked to him again, but Drunk Reese is much more fragile.

“Reese, I have to be up at 7:00. I don’t have time for this right now,” Eric said, softening his tone. 

“Well you didn’t have to yell and curse at me. I just thought you wanted to see me.” I was actually sobbing into the phone. I heard Preston and Kendra approach us but didn’t bother looking up at them. 

“I want to see you but not right now,” Eric said calmly. “I have something very important to do in the morning.” 

“More important than me I guess. Just like everything in your life,” I cried. 

I heard Preston ask who I was talking to and Kendra say she hoped it wasn’t Eric.

Eric sighed. “Don’t do this right now. I’m really tired. Can we talk tomorrow?”

“It is tomorrow!” 

Eric didn’t say anything.

“You’re so mean!” I was sobbing again and I heard Kendra tell me to get off the ground.

Eric let out a deep sigh. “Fine. Come over.” 

“K. Be there soon!” I said and hung up.

I stood up and turned to my friends with a big smile on my face – as if I hadn’t been bawling my eyes out seconds before. 

“I’m taking a taxi to Eric’s,” I announced. 

“So you don’t want to get pizza?” Carly asked.

“Reese, don’t go bother him. I’m sure he just wants to sleep,” Kendra said. 

“Yeah, with me!” I leaned in and gave them all hugs and then hopped in an idle taxi waiting on the curb.

When I got to Eric’s, he came down and let me in in just pajama pants. I never really stopped to appreciate his huge arms, pecs, 8 pack and delicious happy trail.

“Hiiiiii!” Drunk Reese squealed.

“Shhh. We are going to sleep immediately,” Eric said, leading me to the elevator.

When we got up to his apartment, Drunk Reese realized that she should’ve taken Carly up on that pizza offer.

“Do you have anything to eat? I’m starving,” I said. 

“No,” Eric said, walking to his bedroom. 

I ignored him and flipped on the kitchen light. I opened the fridge and found leftover pizza, leftover Chinese food, cheesecake, and fresh fruit – all of which looked absolutely delicious. 

“You lied!” I shouted, taking the box of pizza out the fridge. It appeared to be meat lovers, something Sober Reese would never partake in, but Drunk Reese was drooling like Pavlov’s dog.

I popped two slices in the microwave with no plate or paper towel under it and set it for two minutes. 

“What are you doing?” Eric asked from the bedroom. 

“Eating your pizza, liar. Can’t believe you didn’t wanna share with me!” 

I hopped up on the counter and texted Kendra letting her know that I was safe at Eric’s. After I ate both slices of pizza I dug into the cheesecake. It was divine. As I was shoveling a huge fork full of cheesecake and strawberries in my mouth, Eric appeared in the kitchen. 

“Reese, what the fuck are you doing?” he asked. 

“Do you want some cheesecake?” I held the box of cheesecake and fork out to him. 

“No. I want to go to sleep.”

I took one last bite of cheesecake and followed Eric out of the kitchen. I took off everything except my thong and climbed into bed.

“Eric, you seem upset. Are you mad at me?” I asked, putting my arm around him. 

He shook me off and said, “No. Just… Go to sleep.”

“K.” 

I rolled over and pinned a few things on Pinterest, commented “you look fugly. xo” on someone’s picture on Instagram, and added a dark selfie to my SnapChat story. Then I turned back to Eric and tapped his shoulder. 

“What Reese?” he asked, clearly fed up.

“Goodnight kiss?” I asked. 

He quickly turned around and kissed me hard. Luckily Drunk Reese fell asleep after that.

I woke up feeling like complete and utter shit. I don’t know who told me I had the right to drink vodka waters. Eric was standing at the foot of the bed, getting dressed and I debated pretending like I was asleep or getting up. My full bladder made the decision for me.

“Morning,” I said, climbing out of bed. I was still naked and my head was throbbing.

“Hey,” Eric said.

I breezed past him to the bathroom and tried to decide if I was going to apologize for my shenanigans. This was the second time Drunk Reese had come out to play at an inconvenient time and Eric was probably so over it/her. But I was drunk, what was I supposed to do? I finally decided that I was going to pretend that nothing happened. 

I left the bathroom and Eric was putting on his hat, preparing to leave. “Do you want a ride home?” 

“Yes. Just give me a minute to get dressed,” I said. I found all my clothing strewn across the bedroom floor and got dressed while Eric sat at the foot of the bed.

“What do you have to do this morning?” I asked, to break the silence.

“I have an appointment,” he said shortly. 

“Oh, that’s nice. Who with?” I pressed on. 

“My physical therapist. It’s starting in fifteen minutes,” he replied.

I assumed that meant I needed to hurry so I finished getting dressed and met him at the door. The car ride to my apartment was completely silent but he leaned over and kissed me when he dropped me off. 

“I hope your thing goes great,” I said as one last ditch effort to smooth things over.

He simply said, “Thanks,” and that was the end of that. 

I spent the rest of Saturday nursing my hangover.

*note: I’m doing a Q&A on the blog next week. Send your questions to hotmessinhighheels@gmail.com.

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