Happy New Year. I think I’m still recovering from the weekend.

I decided to have people over on Thursday night to pregame before going to a penthouse party later. So I bought two bottles of champagne, two bottles of tequila, and ingredients to make a Greek feta dip.

I wore a high neck embellished dress and a fur vest and since I had already started drinking when I did my makeup, I went all out with falsies and everything. I haven’t worn false eyelashes since I was in college.

One of Brady and Chris’s friends was hosting the party. I think he rented out the place specifically for the party because it was so fucking nice. When we first got there I ran to the floor to ceiling windows, asked Brady to take a picture of me then demanded to move in.

“Maybe in a few years, babe,” he said and I hugged him.

There were ice buckets with bottles of champagne and liquor so naturally I helped myself to them. It was like a scavenger hunt. I’d find a bottle of Grey Goose and then shout, “Guys, I found the Grey Goose!” to my friends and then I’d pour us a shot. What a fun idea for a party.

Most of the night was a blur, but Carly and I ran around holding hands a lot just like old times. I made Brady wait outside the bathroom for me and I spent about twenty minutes in there talking to my mom. She called me early because she said she didn’t know where she’d be at midnight, but wanted to wish me a happy new year in advance. She’s so considerate.

When I walked out of the bathroom Brady grabbed my hand and led me to the main area where everyone was gathering. I saw Carly’s little silver dress in the middle of the crowd of people and I could see that she was looking down at someone. It didn’t take me long to realize that Chris was proposing. I literally gasped and turned to Brady to see if he was as shocked as I was. He shushed me.

I turned back and everyone started cheering.

“Oh my fucking God. She said yes?” I said to Brady, but he was already elbowing through the crowd to congratulate them.

I followed Brady and Carly came running over to me screaming.

“Oh my God! I told you!” she squealed and threw her arms around my neck.

I was so surprised that I didn’t even know what to say. She pulled away and grinned at me expectantly and I finally said, “Let me see your ring.”

It was a tiny vintage inspired ring with a light, light green center diamond and swirly designs. It’s not my style at all, but it was so pretty.

“Aww,” I cooed. “Congratulations. I can’t believe this.”

We cried and hugged for a while until Brady and Chris came over. Carly and Chris getting engaged was great and amazing and honestly made me kind of hopeful for me and Brady’s relationship. So I suggested we take a celebratory shot and I kept drinking until I blacked out.

Brady woke me up the next morning before he left for work. I rolled over and immediately saw one of my fake eyelashes sitting on the pillow next to my face.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

I made a weird sound, rolled over and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I warmed some leftovers from the day before, grabbed a bottle of water and snuggled on the couch with Tucker and the iPad. So technically, it’s Brady’s iPad, but I use it all the time to watch YouTube videos and shop and stuff. I never realized it before, but Brady’s iCloud account is connected to his iPad. He must have turned the notifications off or something because they never pop up.

I noticed a new message icon so I clicked on it. I couldn’t help myself plus I didn’t realize that it was Brady’s actual real life messages. The message was from Daniela, the young girl who works as Brady’s grandparent’s housekeeper in Florida. It was in Spanish so I didn’t know what it said, but she used smiling emojis. I was so excited that I was in his messages that I didn’t even think to take the time to translate it all. I think that whole relationship is a little bit bizarre. I backed out and looked at all of Brady’s message threads. I found Anna and I couldn’t click on it fast enough.

The last message was from her saying, “Good night,” and I scrolled up so I could see the full conversation. Apparently she had done a photographer friend a favor and modeled for some photos and sent the pictures to Brady. He told her that they looked nice and she proceeded to tell him all about the photo shoot, how many outfit changes there were and how awful the clothes felt, all the makeup she had to wear (which is crazy because to me it looked like only had mascara on), etc.

I scrolled up more and saw that Brady had sent her some pictures of the progress in the basement (it’s still not done) and our bedroom. He told her that I’d “let” him pick out the entertainment center which is true. Anna seemed surprised that the bedroom transformation was all me (remind me to post a pic on Twitter). She even said I was “gifted in that area.” I’m guessing she saw Brady’s all white boring bedroom before.

I scrolled up more and saw them talking about Lindsey and work and it genuinely seems like they are still just great friends. It wasn’t romantic at all. Which made me feel kind of bad for snooping, but not really. I guess I wanted to find some dirt because I started reading the other threads. Lindsey, Chris, Hunter, etc. I didn’t find anything juicy except the fact Hunter and his wife think she might be pregnant again. Ew.

There was a thread with someone named Liz and I eagerly opened it, hoping to find something. But I guess they work together and she talked about her boyfriend and he talked about me a lot. Ugh.

I got a late lunch with Kendra and Carly later in the day. Kendra had spent New Year’s Eve at home with her hubby and hadn’t seen Carly since the engagement. I was excited to discuss everything while sober.

Kendra squealed and hugged Carly for like five minutes. I sat there rolling my eyes because it was super over the top and ridic.

“Were you surprised?” Kendra asked.

Carly glanced at me. “Kind of. I felt it coming, but we wanted to wait a few years.”

“That’s how it was with John and I too. I’m so glad we did it when we did it though,” Kendra said. She started grilling Carly on everything, if they’d picked out a date, was it going to be in Chicago, did they plan on staying in Philly long term, etc. Obviously Carly didn’t have any answers yet. She said Chris didn’t even talk to either of their parents about it beforehand which is just so irresponsible. But whatever floats your boat I suppose.

At the end of the conversation, Carly said, “Soon it’s going to be your turn, Reese!” and Kendra burst out laughing as if that will never happen.

I glared at her and she grabbed my hand. “Love you, Reesie.”

“What’s funny?” I snapped.

“Nothing! I’m sure Brady will propose one day. Or whoever you end up with,” she said, smiling.

“It’ll be Brady,” I assured them.

They didn’t object and we changed the subject.

Marco wanted to give me my gift on Saturday evening. I suggested we meet at Starbucks and he was already waiting for me there. Marco just doesn’t even look like he belongs in a Starbucks with his huge arms, beard and fitted White Sox hat. Plus he’d already ordered my girly looking frappuncino and it looked funny next to him.

“Hey you,” he greeted me with a hug. He had a big gift bag in his hand and I tried to peek in it.

“What is it?” I asked.

Marco smirked at me and held the bag out. I peeked inside and saw the white Louis Vuitton monogram print.

“Marco,” I said, looking at him and not taking the bag. “I don’t want it.”

“Yes you do, crazy girl,” he said.

I guess I didn’t put up that much of a fight, but Marco wouldn’t let me refuse the gift. A fucking Louis Vuitton bag. I literally didn’t get him anything. And it really weirded me out because it matches the LV card holder Brady got me for Christmas. So I don’t know what to do with it. I haven’t given him any reason to give me an LV bag, I promise. I’m not leading him on or anything. Seriously.

That night I went out to a sports bar with Lexi. The guy she was talking to turned out to be engaged so she needed a crazy night out. We went to a bar we’ve been to together before and the bartender remembered us and took shots with us. He’s actually married (he has a ring), but he still flirted with us and gave us a ton of free drinks.

There was a group of guys sitting at a table behind us and one of them got up and introduced himself and asked us to sit with them. Lexi was off her stool before I could even decide if I wanted to or not.

Within half an hour, Lexi had picked one of them to be her man for the night. I was hanging out with a guy named Sam, who works for Tesla in California, but was visiting his friends for the weekend. We all decided to go to another bar and I don’t remember even getting there. I vaguely recall fighting with the door guy at the next bar and taking more shots (my idea).

We ended up at a high rise apartment and Lexi and I raided the refrigerator because we were starving. We found pizza rolls and heated up the entire bag for everyone. Lexi disappeared upstairs with her guy and I fell asleep on the couch with my plate of pizza rolls.

Lexi woke me up.

“Your boyfriend is blowing up your phone,” she told me grumpily, shoving the phone in my hand.

I sat up and looked around, momentarily forgetting where I was. The apartment was really fucking nice with high ceilings and huge windows. I’d slept through the night and I could see that it was morning.

“Hey,” I answered.

“Where the hell are you?” Brady demanded, sounding annoyed.

“I’m at Lexi’s,” I answered.

“Are you kidding me? Where does she live? I’ve been trying to get ahold of you all night!”

“I’m coming home right now,” I said calmly. “No need to freak out.”

Brady hung up on me so I knew I needed to get home fast. Lexi tried to get me to stay because the guys wanted to take us to brunch (brunch? In my dress and makeup from last night?), but I told her that Brady was going to have my ass if I didn’t get home soon. He’s never hung up on me.

I logged onto Facebook on my way home and saw that Lexi had tagged me in a ton of pictures. A group picture from the bar that I’m guessing a bartender took, a picture of me with the pizza rolls, a picture where I was pulling the neckline of my dress down so you could see my cleavage, a picture of me kissing Sam on the cheek. What the fucking fuck, Lexi! I called her and she didn’t answer so I texted her, “Delete those pictures right fucking now dude I can’t believe you posted them.” I started untagging myself and saw that they’d been up for 8 hours. I prayed Brady hadn’t seen them yet.

Tucker greeted me at the door. I stayed in the foyer and played with him for a little while so I could delay the confrontation and lecture I knew I was about to get. I finally picked him up and walked inside. Brady was walking out of the kitchen and I began apologizing immediately.

“I’m so sorry. I literally passed out on the couch and Lexi had my phone all night. I didn’t mean to make you worry,” I said.

“You slept at Lexi’s apartment?” Brady asked.

“Um, yeah.” I didn’t know if he’d seen the pictures or if telling him the truth would be worth all the trouble it was going to cause.

“I don’t think you should hang out with her anymore,” Brady said calmly.

I was taken aback. Brady would never ask me not to hang out with one of my friends. “Why not?”

“Because I don’t want you to. I don’t like the situations you get into when you’re with her,” he said.

“But she’s my friend, Brady,” I argued.

“And she’s single. You are not.”

Before I could continue, Brady walked past me down the hall.

We hadn’t gotten a chance to talk about Carly and Chris’s engagement so we did at dinner that night. Even Brady had no idea that Chris was going to pop the question – like he was just as shocked as I was. When I read their messages Chris didn’t mention anything, he didn’t give Brady even a hint that he was going to propose. I figured guys would talk about that.

“He didn’t ask you for advice or anything? That’s so weird,” I said.

“Well, I’m probably the last person he would need advice from,” Brady laughed.

I glanced at him. “Why?”

He shrugged. “I’m happy for them.”

“Do you think we’ll be next? We’ve been together just as long,” I asked.

“I don’t know. Their relationship is different than ours. No need to compare.”

“Because I’m sure he actually communicates with her,” I mumbled. Brady pretended not to hear me.

Whatever y’all have to say, say it. I already feel bad enough about the entire weekend. I know Brady deserves someone better than me.

I’m sorry about the lack of posts lately. Being a mom is hard – a lot harder than I thought it would be. He’s always wanting to go outside and use the restroom and eat and play. It’s exhausting, but it’s fun. Brady told a bunch of people at work about Tucker and how he was looking for a permanent home for him and one of his coworkers said she wanted him to give to her granddaughter. When Brady told me that he might have found a home for Tucker, I threw a tantrum and cried. Because that’s mean. You can’t just give someone’s child away.

Anyway, I have so much to catch y’all up on. I went out with Luke and Stacey the other night. I’d agreed to go before I knew Stacey was invited and I thought maybe we all might have fun, especially if alcohol was involved. So we got dinner and drinks with this other girl we work with. The entire meal kind of felt like a competition between me and Stacey. She kept interrupting my stories and trying to talk over me and it was just super uncalled for. Eventually I just ignored her.

Brady was out with Lindsey and some of their guy friends so we met up with them at the bar. They were waiting for us and naturally I ran over excitedly because that’s bae. Stacey completely ignored Brady and Lindsey and their friends until she found out that Lindsey works for the company she’s trying to work for. So she started asking a ton of questions.

I leaned over to Brady and said, “See how rude she is?”

He shushed me as if I was being loud and she would hear me. I rolled my eyes. “She sucks and I hate her.”

Brady ordered a round of shots for all of us, like that was going to help us get along better. After we took the shot Stacey came sauntering over.

“Reese, is this your boyfriend?” she asked sweetly.

“No, this is a look alike I just found,” I answered sarcastically.

Stacey ignored my comment and reached around me to give Brady a side hug. So unnecessary. She started talking to him about our office and work and stuff and I just stood there sipping my drink. Brady is so polite and patient. I knew he didn’t give a shit what the girl was talking about.

I had stopped listening to their conversation until Stacey grinned devilishly at me. “Reese is so lucky though. She doesn’t have to do all the bitch work we have to do. She doesn’t really have to do anything.”

“Ugh, shut up, Stacey,” I couldn’t help saying. “You have no idea what I do.”

She burst out laughing like I was joking. Obviously I wasn’t.

Brady grabbed my hip and said, “Don’t.”

Stacey turned back around to order a drink and I pulled away from Brady.

“Don’t what? Why do you always take my enemies side?” I said.

“I’m not taking anyone’s side, Reese. I don’t want you to be angry right now. Just chill out,” Brady said calmly.

So I decided to go back to ignoring Stacey since she was being deliberately annoying. Luckily she stayed away until it was time to go. We all headed outside and she stopped everyone so she could take a group selfie for Snapchat.

“Brady, what’s your Snapchat?” she asked.

Before Brady could even open his mouth I replied, “He doesn’t have one,” like a jealous psycho wife. I didn’t even care.

Stacey giggled and walked away. She clinged on to Lindsey after that and insisted they exchange numbers. Obviously Stacey just wanted help getting a job and it really annoyed me. But Lindsey seemed okay with it so whatever.

Dale and I have been sparring constantly. I know I should just let him do his job and keep quiet, but he sucks. He doesn’t work efficiently and has the worst ideas ever. He’s always complaining about our budget and how we need to cut costs anywhere and everywhere we can. So of course, I’ve been being super modest with my AmEx, I made someone part time instead of full time (she wanted to go back to school so it was fine), I’ve been working my tail off trying to source cheaper manufacturers and really going out of my way to help cut costs. Then Dale goes out and hires FIVE new people for various positions around the office. Two executive assistants, an HR generalist, an inventory manager and some other job I can’t even think of because it’s so ridiculous.

After our third new person walked in introducing themselves, I found Dale and asked him what was going on with all these new people and how they fit in with our budget.

He smiled condescendingly. “Reese, we’re always trying to be as budget conscious as we can, but if things need to get done, they have to get done. We can’t sacrifice everything just to save money.”

I thought that was a completely fair argument and decided to continue doing my job as normal, but still trying to be aware of our budget (I get my own budget that was given to me by Dave and I’ve never even gotten close to maxing it). But one day Dale cornered me in the hallway and said, “Let’s talk.”

I’m like, “Okay, what’s up?”

He took me in his office and pulled out my AmEx statement which he had marked up with a highlighter and red pen. He proceeded to question me about every expense and lecture me about our company budget (not my own budget which I still haven’t gotten close to).

I said, “Maybe you should confiscate my American Express and I’ll just bug you every time I need something?”

Dale laughed. “Do you think I have time to babysit you? But I want a detailed expense report at the end of each day for the next two weeks until we can get this under control.”

As if that isn’t babysitting.

Since Dale and I were butting heads a lot, I tried to avoid him and just communicate with him through his new assistant, Vanessa. It sounds immature, but I just can’t stand even looking at him. I catch him walking around the office all the time, just observing everyone and not doing anything. Then he will tell Vanessa to write down this huge list of things that need to get done, not do any of it and not follow up that any of it gets done. He’s just not effective.

Now I usually come home and pour a glass of wine and get in bed with Tucker. So depressing. At least Brady’s been nice. He can tell how unhappy I’ve been so he usually comes home with some sort of treat. Well, that and we got in a fight one day because a girl at work brought him lunch so he had to make up for that. Am I allowed to be annoyed by that? Is she calling me a bad wife? This girl literally made food specifically to bring for Brady. I threw a fit, naturally.

“Did you tell her you don’t eat at home? Does she feel bad for you?” I demanded.

“Of course not! She’s half Vietnamese and wanted me to try a traditional Vietnamese dish,” Brady said.

“We could have gone to a Vietnamese restaurant! She just wanted to flirt with you. You’re so naive,” I said, then I had a thought. “You’re so cultured, do you expect me to believe you’ve never had Vietnamese food?”

“I have. It’s not a big deal, Reese. I think she’s engaged,” he said.

“You think? How do you not know?”

“She has a ring, but I mean, I didn’t ask…”

“So obviously you don’t talk about me either. Unbelievable, Brady. Unbelievable.”

Anyway, after that Brady came home everyday with treats for me and Tucker. Chocolate, froyo, Rice Krispy treats, wine, US Weekly, etc. It’s like our thing now. We greet him at the door with our hands out.

Thursday was Brady’s birthday so I threw him an ugly sweater party. Most of our friends weren’t even in town, but I still thought it would be fun. I made cookies and Jell-O shots for the occasion.

Carly and Chris were the first to arrive at 2:30 PM. They’re home for the holidays.

“I think Chris is going to propose!” was one of the first things Carly whispered in my ear.

I jerked my head toward her. “What? How do you know?”

She was grinning from ear to fucking ear. “He’s just been acting all nervous and weird. Has he said anything to Brady?”

I shook my head. “Brady hasn’t told me anything. Chris hasn’t even asked me for permission or my opinion on a ring.”

“He knows what kind of ring I want. I’ve sent him pictures,” Carly blushed.

“Wait, so you’ve talked about it?”

“Kind of. I told him that I want to be engaged within the next two or three years.”

“And what did he say?”

“He agrees.”

I started thinking that maybe I should give Brady a timeline too. I made a note to ask him what his thoughts and ideas were.

Brady ended up getting super drunk which I loved because it was his birthday. He deserves to get drunk. He kept insisting I keep drinking because he didn’t want to be the only one drunk.

“Am I the only one who’s drunk? I’m so embarrassed. Babe, why did you let me drink this much?” Brady said. It was so presh.

But he did end up performing Back to Back by Drake which was the highlight of everyone’s night. I had no idea that Brady even knew that song. He’s more of a Rooney kind of a guy.

We both woke up hungover as fuck on Christmas. I wanted to die. Brady, who always handles hangovers and alcohol in general better than me, got up and made waffles and we sat at the table to eat.

I couldn’t wait to open gifts because over the last few weeks the number of gifts under our tree kept growing and growing. I think we just kept trying to one-up each other. One of the gifts I got for Brady he knew about because he had to install it himself. He’s been talking about wanting a new tv for the basement for a while so I just got him one. I literally walked into Best Buy and told the sales guy to help me pick out the largest and nicest tv they had. So he talked me into this really cool new curved tv for optimum viewing. Loved it.

I also got him a cute leather planner even though he doesn’t use a planner, new bedding, a Burberry tie, several pairs of fun socks, an All Saints jacket and a watch. I love giving gifts. Especially to Brady because he always appreciates it (except if I bought it with his own money, obviously). Plus I want to mold him so he looks less Banana Republic and more like my boyfriend. Not sorry!

Oh. Marco got me a Christmas gift. I haven’t gotten it yet because I haven’t seen him. I told him that he didn’t have to get me anything (especially because I haven’t gotten him anything), but he insists that he wants me to have it. I mean, I’m not going to turn down a gift so.

Anyway, I’m so happy to be off for the rest of the week. Does anyone have any tips for dealing with Dale? I’ve tried really hard to go in to the office each day with a happy open mind, but now I’m ready to jump off a bridge. Or at least quit. I’m already dreading going back. Help.

Brady was sick and stayed home from work on Monday. He becomes such a baby when he’s sick. When I woke up and saw that he was still in bed with me, I quickly shook him thinking he had overslept. Brady rolled over and whined, “Stop it, Reese. I don’t feel well!”

I felt bad for him and apologized. I got up and made him some tea and sat it on the nightstand next to him.

“I don’t want any,” Brady grumbled.

“I think it’ll help make you feel better,” I reasoned with him.

He ignored me and rolled over.

Stacey called into work sick on Monday also. She and Luke went out on Sunday night (I saw on Snapchat), but Luke actually showed up to work. He was hungover as fuck, but he still came at least.

“I should probably let Dale know that Stacey isn’t actually sick, shouldn’t I? Maybe show him your Snapchat story?” I said to Luke.

He gave me a look. “Don’t be like that, Reese. You’re being spiteful.”

I gave him a, “So what?” look and rolled my eyes. “She hasn’t been here long enough to pull this shit. Just saying.”

I wasn’t actually going to tell Dale, but still. Stacey has barely even been here for a month. She hasn’t even earned any sick days!

Brady felt a little better on Tuesday (luckily) and ended up going into work a little later. Stacey came back to work too and I gave her a knowing look. She shrugged and smiled coyly. Like, she knows she can get away with it. It just annoyed me.

After work, Luke, Stacey and I went out for drinks. She was being super annoyingly nice to me all day and asking questions about Brady and my life (“Omg, so you just moved all your stuff into his place? Does he make you pay rent? Did it change your relationship? Do you cook for him every night? Do you separate chores?”) so maybe Luke told her that I threatened to snitch on her. But since she was being kind of cool, we all decided to get drinks.

Stacey told us that she is looking for another job and has been interviewing elsewhere.

“I just need to get paid more. The job I interviewed for yesterday starts at $65k a year,” she explained.

“What job?” I asked.

“Basically I’d be investigating financial fraud. They found me on LinkedIn. And they’ve already emailed me requesting a second interview,” she said.

I nodded, wondering if I should tell anyone that she was looking for another job. Not even to be a petty bitch, but if she doesn’t plan on sticking around for long then her boss needs to know.

“How much do you make, Reese?” Stacey asked me.

“I’m not telling you,” I scoffed, shocked that she would even have the nerve to ask.

“I bet you make more than $65,000. See, I need your job. You make bank and you literally do not do anything.”

See how shady she is? We were having a good day, but she always manages to piss me off. I decided not to argue with her so I just shrugged and pulled out my phone. I had a new iMessage from a weird number I didn’t recognize.

Guess who it was?

Brady’s mom. I swear my jaw hit the floor. I’m shocked that that woman even knows how to use an iPhone. And how on earth did she get my number?

I responded, “Hey, how are you?” back.

She said, “There was a death in the family and I’d really like Brady to travel home for the services this upcoming weekend.”

Brady didn’t mention anything about a death in the family to me, but he doesn’t tell me anything so.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” was all I could think to say.

“He hasn’t made arrangements to come home, and I haven’t been able to reach him. If you get a chance to speak with him, will you please stress to him how important this is?” Brady’s mom said.

I can’t believe she was asking me for a favor. Brady hasn’t even told me about this death so how was I supposed to convince him to go home for the services? But I still said, “Sure.”

She said, “Thank you,” and that was the end of our texting conversation.

When I got home Brady wasn’t home yet so I started on dinner. He came and found me in the kitchen and he looked tired, but not as sickly as he did that morning.

“Your mom texted me,” I greeted him.

His brow furrowed. “What? Why?”

I shrugged like it was no big deal. “She hasn’t been able to get a hold of you. She wants you to come home for the funeral…”

Brady sighed, throwing his hands up dramatically. “I don’t want to fucking go, Reese!”

“Who died?” I asked.

“My great aunt. I haven’t seen her in probably fifteen years. I’m not going all the way back home for that,” he said.

“Oh, maybe you should. Your mom really wants you there and you don’t want to regret it.” I don’t even know why I was pushing it. Maybe I just thought I was doing the right thing. I guess it wasn’t really my place.

“I can’t believe you’re doing this,” Brady mumbled and stormed out.

I decided to give him some space and not bring it up again. I didn’t want to fight with him about something I didn’t even care about. But when we sat down for dinner, he told me that his flight was leaving at 9:00 PM on Thursday night. I guess he felt guilty.

Since Brady was gone for the weekend I decided to have people over on Friday night. I dug into my margarita board on Pinterest, made margaritas and invited Preston, Joe, Lexi, her bae, her friend, Maci, and Luke over.

I got a little bit drunk and decided to invite Marco over. I got approval from Preston first – he told me that we needed more testosterone. Marco showed up with two guy friends and a bottle of Don Julio. I heard him ask someone, “Where’s my favorite tequila lover?” and I ran to greet him. I took him around to everyone and introduced him as my best friend.

Then we went to the kitchen and talked about life. Marco and I have a strictly platonic relationship, obviously, but sometimes he will sneak in comments about how I’m hot or have a nice body. I try to shut them down immediately and tell him he’s being ridiculous, but usually I don’t even acknowledge it. Is that bad? It’s not like I like or need the attention, but overall he’s a great guy friend to have. Plus, I always tell my girl friends how pretty they are and comment on their boobs so it’s fine right?

The next morning I woke up in bed with a bottle of water next to me. It kind of freaked me out because that’s something Brady always does. I called him and he couldn’t talk because he was with family. He texted me after we hung up and said, “I might come home with a surprise.”

I can’t handle surprises so I badgered him for the next two hours about what it was. He was busy and couldn’t respond so obviously I was dying of curiosity.

Later on in the day, I was at Nordstrom (returning things I purchased online) and Brady called me back.

“What’s this fucking surprise?” I greeted him.

He laughed. “My aunt had a dog and they aren’t sure what to do with it. No one can take on a pet right now.”

“So you’re going to keep it?” I gasped.

“I don’t know. I was thinking about it. Maybe we could just keep him for a little while until we find a permanent home for him. I don’t want him to have to go to a shelter.”

When Brady said that it melted my heart – how sweet he sounded wanting to make sure the dog was safe and happy. We hung up and Brady sent me a few pictures of the dog, a tan Pomeranian looking thing. I was instantly in love and couldn’t wait to meet my new child! Literally almost started crying is the middle of Nordstrom.

So my baby daddy and son came home on Saturday night. Brady told me that the dog (Tucker) was coming with some supplies, but after I left Nordstrom I went crazy at Petsmart and got him a new bed, collar, toys, treats and a Santa outfit (I just had to).

I was waiting in the living room when Brady walked in with all his stuff and what looked like a dog carrier.

“Where is he? Let him out!” I squealed.

Brady laughed and put the pet carrier down, letting Tucker out. He came bounding out and ran right over to me.

“He likes me!” I said, picking him up.

“He’s really friendly. He likes everyone,” Brady replied.

I glared at him.

Tucker and I bonded all night. Brady kind of yelled at me for buying him new things when he already had them, but I insisted that he was starting a new life and needed new things. I’d set up Tucker’s bed at the foot of our bed, but after we turned off the lights he started whining by the side of the bed.

I got up and put him back in his bed, thinking that was the solution.

“He wants to sleep with us,” Brady said.

I’ve never slept in a bed with a dog so I wasn’t sure how I felt. I put Tucker in his bed then I got back in our bed. Literally one minute later he was whining again.

“Tucker,” I warned in my best mommy voice. “It’s bedtime.”

In his little world bedtime must mean play time because he started dancing on two legs.

“Oh my gosh, he’s so needy,” I said.

“Just bring him in the bed and let’s go to sleep,” Brady said, yawning.

So I brought Tucker in bed and he curled up between Brady and me and was sleeping within five minutes. So cute!

We were rained in on Sunday so I made breakfast and Brady and I sat around drinking this red wine/chocolate drink I got at the grocery store. We ended up getting into a fight about the basement because I wanted all new furniture and Brady assured me that we don’t need it. I mean, it’s nice and all, but it’s way too bachelor and basement looking. I won and we ordered a glass entertainment center, a modern coffee table, and an armchair. I really wanted a new sectional, but Brady wouldn’t do it.

I felt bad leaving Tucker home by himself when I went to work yesterday. I seriously considered working from home, but if we are going to keep Tucker for any significant amount of time, then he needs to learn to be alone. I felt like I needed to keep him confined to one room so I moved his bed, food and water into the office and closed him in there. Apparently he didn’t like it because the people who live upstairs texted Brady asking if we got a dog because they heard him  whining and barking all day.

Can you believe I finally have a doggie? He’s so sweet and cute and wants to be near me all the time (he literally follows me into the bathroom and sits at my feet). I’m secretly afraid that Brady is going to find someone who wants him and we are going to have to give him away.

I hate work. We hired this new girl who I loved when we interviewed her, but not so much anymore. She started a few weeks ago and I liked her at first because she was sassy and seemed pretty determined to be good at her job (she’s an account exec). People claimed she kind of looked like me, especially from the back. We have the same hair color and length, have similar builds (we are the same height, but she’s shaped like a 12 year old boy whereas I have some curves, obviously). I thought I would take her under my wing, but she (Stacey) was adamant that that wouldn’t happen which is weird because if I was starting a new job I would want someone to do that for me.

One day I asked her where she was in her training and she said, “I’m almost finished. Why?”

Her tone was rude and it caught me off guard. But I still said, “I’m just trying to help. I can be a resource for you, too.”

And she rolled her eyes and stormed off. Can you believe that? I was literally just trying to help.

Another time, I heard her on a call giving out the wrong information so once she hung up I came back and told her the correct information. I was super nice about it, promise, and she goes, “I know what I’m doing, Reese.” Like what a fucking brat.

Still, I didn’t want to be mean to her because we work kind of closely together and I didn’t it to get awkward (hello, Whitney!). I was standing in the break room with Stacey and Luke one day last week and Luke was telling her how he was really intimidated by me at first.

Stacey smirked. “Really? I don’t see why you were intimidated.”

Isn’t that kind of rude? I felt like it was. What point was she trying to make? And then Luke was telling her how hot he thinks Brady is (cuz bae is hot, duh) and Stacey demanded to see a photo. I pulled up a selfie Brady sent me from work where he looks super, super hot and Stacey scrunched her nose up.

“Oh. I expected him to be a lot cuter,” she said.

That’s when I decided that I hate her. It doesn’t help that she and Luke have hit it off and go to lunch together a lot. And she’s always in his Snaps. Maybe I feel like I’ve been replaced which is embarrassingly childish, but I can’t help it. I’m territorial of my friends (and food).

On Thursday, Brady texted me wanting to get drinks after work. I guess he had a long day. So we met at this place near the house and Brady was already there drinking a beer.

“Is there food?” was the first thing I asked.

He handed me a menu and I ordered chips and guac. And a margarita. By the time I finished my second margarita I was angrily telling Brady about how much I hate Stacey.

“She said she doesn’t think you’re hot!” I concluded.

Brady smirked at me. “And you’re mad at her for that?”

“Yes!” I exclaimed. He didn’t say anything so I continued. “She’s a huge bitch. I just want a new job.”

“So you want a new job because of some new girl below you?” Brady clarified.

“It’s not just that. I’m unhappy. Everyone sucks now. Can I be a stay at home mom?” I asked.

“No.” Brady laughed. “How can you be a stay at home mom when you aren’t even a mom?”

“Well, when we get a puppy. That’ll require a lot of work,” I sniffled.

“I think you’re being dramatic and rash.”

I glared at him. “I think you’re being insensitive.”

“Fine. Quit your job then,” he said.

We changed the subject after that.

Luke invited me out on Friday night and I felt bad leaving Brady because he’d already made plans for us to order pizza and stay in. He assured me that he didn’t mind so I went anyway. We went to Boystown to dance and get cheap drinks. All the gays gagged over my outfit (high rise flare jeans, lace up crop top) and wanted to spoil me and Luke with fruity drinks. We weren’t complaining.

We ended up running into Preston and his boyfriend, Joe and some of their girl friends.

“Oh my God, you didn’t tell me you were coming here! You’re so fucking cute, I can’t deal!” Preston screamed. We hugged for an entire minute and then ran to the bar to get tequila shots, obviously.

I ended up meeting this Puerto Rican guy named Marco. He was in the bar to pick up his brother, but he was totally, 100% straight. And he was so hot (tame beard, light eyes, muscles and tattoos). I shouldn’t have, but I hung out with him and flirted with him for way too long. None of my friends stopped me. We exchanged numbers then he had to leave to take his brother home.

I had Brady come get me when I had too much to drunk. The bar ran out of the good tequila so we’d settled for some house shit that almost killed me. The next morning I woke up and cracked one eye open. Brady was walking out of the bathroom.

“We should go to Puerto Rico for New Years,” I blurted out.

“Hmm?” Brady said, looking confused.

I remembered that Marco had told me about his extended trip back home to Puerto Rico and encouraged me to go because it’s really cool.

“It’ll be fun,” I said, closing my eyes and falling back asleep.

Brady and I spent all of Saturday at Home Depot picking up shit we need for the house. The place was a zoo and we had to wait around for like two hours to even get any help. I texted Marco the whole time. Before you judge, it was totally innocent. He’s cool. We vibe really well. He reminds me of my ex a little bit, but way more mature and sweet. I think we can be friends – I don’t have any straight male friends! I’m allowed to have male friends.

That night Lindsey came over. I haven’t seen much of her since she moved out, but she likes all my Instagram pictures so I guess there’s no hard feelings. She and Brady always talk about the latest news and I’m always super curious to hear Brady’s views because Brady and I never talk about that stuff. Is that weird? I think it’s because neither of us is really that passionate or opinionated about it. Lindsey is. She’s pretty conservative and always shares stupid articles on Facebook.

I’d finished an entire bottle of wine by myself so after Lindsey left, I made Brady tell me the story of him losing his virginity.

“Ugh, why?” he groaned.

“I just want to knowwww, Brady bae,” I said.

He paused for a moment as if debating telling me. Then he said, “I was a sophomore in high school and this older girl had a crush on me.”

“Was she cute?” I interjected.

“She was all right. Blonde,” he said.

“She sounds hideous.”

Brady laughed. “Yeah. She would always hit on me. I wasn’t into her, but my friends said I should go for it – that she obviously wanted to…sleep with me.”

I regretted asking him, but I needed to hear the end of the story.

“So we did one night. At a party.”

“How was it?” I had to know.

“Nothing special. I didn’t last very long.”

“How long did you last?!”

“I don’t know. A couple minutes?”

I gasped. Then I laughed. Brady glared at me.

“That’s so precious! Let me see her!” I exclaimed.

“Um…I don’t have a picture of her,” he said.

“Facebook! Use my phone!” I pulled up Facebook, logged out and handed Brady my phone.

I waited a few minutes until he finally turned the phone around and showed me this blonde bombshell. She was seriously really hot. She looks like Miss America. So I was mad at him for claiming she was just “all right” and that he’d had sex with a hot girl. So I grabbed my phone and got in bed. Brady stayed up and hung out while I texted my new BFF, Marco, who I love. He’s so real, you know? I sometimes feel like I’m living in some fantasy land and Brady lets me believe it. Marco somehow brings me back to reality.

The next morning, Brady and I went to church with Kendra and John. Afterwards, we went to brunch and ordered a pitcher of white peach mimosas. So yummy. I think I finished an entire pitcher by myself.

“I want to go shopping!” I demanded when we left brunch.

“Really? What do you need?” Brady asked.

“Everything! Take me to Nordstrom!” I said.

“Reese, no. You don’t need to go shopping.”

“Please? Please? Puh-leeeeze!” I whined. “Just drop me off. I’ll find a way home.”

Brady literally refused to take me to Nordstrom so I went home and cried then ordered a ton of stuff from Nordstrom.com. Take that! I went to Facebook on my phone and realized that Brady was still logged in. I started scrolling through his newsfeed then I went to his messages because obviously that’s where all the juice was. The first two messages were from girls whose names and faces I didn’t recognize. I suddenly felt really bad for snooping so I logged out before reading anything. See how much I’ve changed! I’m dying to know who he’s talking to and about what.

We have a work group chat and tonight we were all talking about what we were going to bring for our work holiday party next week. I said I would make a cheesecake and Stacey said, “Reese, can you even bake?” And added an annoying emoji. Luke replied, “LOL,” and I wanted to kill both of them. Maybe I was being too sensitive but it really pissed me off. I can’t fucking stand her. I’m quitting.

I wish I would have known Brady’s sister in law didn’t celebrate Thanksgiving before we went all the way to San Francisco to celebrate Thanksgiving with them. And Black Friday for that matter. They actually live about an hour away from the airport in the middle of the woods. Kind of like Brady’s parents’ house. Hunter came and picked us up (in a late 90s Range Rover, of course) and informed us that we needed to stop at the “market” to get food, but apparently that meant liquor to get us through the week. We went into the liquor store and all picked out a handle of what we wanted. Guess what I picked!

When we got to the home/cabin/solar powered castle, Hunter’s wife, Dom greeted us at the door. I met Dom last year at Brady’s dad’s party and she was a total bitch to me. So I wasn’t looking forward to seeing her again. She had the baby strapped to her torso and didn’t speak to me or Brady as we walked in.

“Did you get the asparagus?” she demanded. She glared at me and Brady like it was somehow our fault that Hunter forgot the asparagus. Guess we really should have gone to the market.

Hunter took us upstairs to the guest bedroom we would be staying in. Right across from their bedroom.

“You guys get settled in. Me and the wifey are going to make dinner,” he told us.

As soon as Hunter walked out, I said, “I can’t believe he’s still with her. She’s so awful.”

Of course Brady defended Dom and said, “He loves her.”

“She’s mean and I’m not speaking to her this whole trip,” I said.

Brady looked at me like I was being ridiculous so I rolled my eyes and said just kidding. Even though I wasn’t.

I took off my pants and took a nap in the little bed because I was exhausted from traveling. It was literally a dorm room sized bed. Super inconvenient. I’m used to our king sized bed. Brady woke me up a little while later because dinner was ready. I changed into a Free People tunic and fringe Minnetonka ankle boots. Reese-ahontas.

When we got back downstairs Dom was sitting at the table breastfeeding the baby.

“Dinner is served!” Hunter shouted and I couldn’t help thinking he meant Dom’s tits were dinner.

Luckily though, Hunter grilled steaks and potatoes for us. When we sat down to eat, Dom immediately scolded us for still living in a city as corrupt as Chicago. This was the day the cop was arrested for shooting the 17 year old boy.

“Believe me, if I didn’t have this guy, I would be marching with them. Law enforcement is so corrupt. The justice system is so corrupt,” she snarled.

I looked at Brady and Hunter and they didn’t even bother looking up at her. I guess I felt bad that they were ignoring her so is said, “Yeah, it’s really sad.”

“I’m just sick of this shit,” she kept going. “And I’m sick of people talking about how sad and unfortunate it is, but not doing anything about it.” Dom looked pointedly at me.

No wonder Hunter and Brady decided not to say anything at all. After dinner, we sat around playing with the baby, who is so fucking cute by the way. He has Dom’s darker, olive skin with huge blue eyes and light brown hair. I want my kid to look exactly like that.

The next night, the night before Thanksgiving, we all went out. Hunter and Dom have a part time nanny who helps out (even though Dom doesn’t even work) and she just happens to be blonde and super hot. She’s probably only like 19, but still. With all the marriages breaking up because of nannies recently, I wanted to warn Dom to watch her husband. But since she’s a bitch to me, I didn’t say anything.

We ended up at a gay bar downtown. It was totally my scene and naturally I wanted to get super duper drunk so I kept ordering more shots for me and Brady. I started discreetly telling people he was my gay bestie because I thought it was funny. All the guys started introducing themselves to him and asking me if he was available. Brady was super weirded out and uncomfortable, but he had no idea that I told people that. It was entertaining. I grinded my ass on him all night until he got a boner and grabbed my wrists.

“Are you almost ready?” he whispered in my ear.

I nodded my head while sipping my vodka tonic. Brady went to get Hunter and Dom while I closed our tab. On our way out the door, an older guy who was short and bald, grabbed Brady’s ass.

“Dude! I’m not gay!” Brady told him and I practically fell over laughing all the way outside. When I finally pulled myself together and wiped my tears away, I told him the truth.

“I told everyone you were gay,” I explained.

“What? Why would you do that?” Brady exclaimed.

I began laughing. “Because it was funny. All the gays love you!”

Brady grabbed my shoulders and shook me playfully. “I can’t believe you did that. Do I need to prove to you that I’m not gay?”

I nodded happily. When we got back to the house, Hunter and Brady wanted to continue taking shots. Even I was ready to call it a night. I sat there petting Brady until he was ready to go upstairs.

The next morning, we laid in bed with the iPad looking at cookware sets. New pots and pans weren’t a part of our renovation (or budget), but if I’m going to be a cooking wifey then I need new ones. I picked out copper/rose gold ones then got matching dinnerware.

While we were laying there, Brady said, “I know I don’t say it enough, but I really appreciate you.”

I glanced up at him and said, “Aw, thanks. Even though I told everyone you were gay?”

Brady laughed. “Never a dull moment with you.”

I feel like he must have seen how happy Hunter and Dom are and realized that we could be like that if we try. Neither of us share our feelings with each other often enough.

The rest of the day we were really lovey dovey and all over each other. Dom even rolled her eyes and said, “Stop being so extra.”

That night was weird. We all sat around drinking beer and someone suggested we smoke. So we left Dom and the baby inside and went outside to get high. Hunter prepared the joint/cigarette (blunt? I don’t know anything about this stuff) and we passed it around. After my first turn (and choking and coughing up my lung) I could tell something was different. I just figured San Francisco had different weed.

We finished it off and the next thing I remember is spinning around in circles in the backyard. I felt like I was going really, really fast like a dreidel, but then I would see Brady and it was like he was still and not moving, but everything else was still spinning. It was so fucking weird.

Eventually, I collapsed on the ground and started laughing uncontrollably. Brady appeared above me, grabbing my shoulders so I didn’t crack my skull on the concrete. He was saying something, but he sounded really far away and I couldn’t understand him. He tried to lift me up and I made my body limp so he couldn’t lift my deadweight.

“Dude, is she okay?” Hunter shouted from really far away.

Brady grunted in response. After letting him struggle for a little while longer, I started laughing again and got up myself. We ended up in a patio chair with me on Brady’s lap. We started kissing and I thought it would be funny and cute to bite his bottom lip. Apparently I did it too hard.

“Ow! Fuck!” Brady exclaimed. He touched his fingers to his lip and I saw that there was blood. I started sobbing.

“I’m such an awful person. I don’t blame you for hating me!” I cried.

Brady didn’t respond because he was trying to stop his lip from bleeding.

“I’m calling 911,” I declared getting up.

“Reese, don’t,” he said, following me.

Luckily my phone was nowhere to be found. We went inside and I started baking a chocolate cake I found in one of the cabinets. I popped it in the oven and chugged a bottle of water. I finished it in under ten seconds. Brady and I went upstairs and as soon as I sat on the bed I fell asleep.

The next day we had plans of going to a winery so I woke up excited for that. I had kind of forgotten about the night before until Brady told me that Dom was annoyed with me and I should probably apologize when I got a chance. I had no idea why she would possibly be mad at me so I asked.

“Well, you left a cake baking in the oven for two and a half hours and could have burned the house down,” he explained.

“Oh,” I said. “Do they not have any smoke detectors?”

Brady just looked at me. I finished getting ready, putting on my warmest, most boho, hippie outfit ever. I’m going through a boho phase right now.

I avoided Dom the entire day. I could tell she was still annoyed and ignoring me too, but would sometimes make snarky comments. I was sipping on a particular red wine and I complained that it was too bitter.

Dom said, “People like you can never be satisfied.” And she just kept making remarks like that the whole trip.

When we got back home, Dom got inside and snatched the baby from the nanny and immediately opened her shirt to start nursing. She went upstairs and the nanny, Caitlin, stayed and hung out with us for a little while. I wanted to ask her how she stands working for such an evil witch like Dom, but I decided not to. As she was leaving, she told Hunter she would be going on a trip and he said, “Text me and remind me.” Obviously it was totally innocent, but I secretly hoped that they had an affair going on. Then I got mad at myself for thinking something so mean.

We left San Francisco early on Saturday morning. I had fun, but I was beyond ready to get home. Especially because I had like four packages waiting for me.

On Saturday night, even though I was exhausted, I went out with Lexi and some of her friends. I didn’t know it at the time, but she and Kyle fizzled out and now she’s talking to a new guy who we met up with that night. He brought a friend and the friend started making passes at me immediately. And I missed my boyfriend so I ended up going home early.

Brady and I spent all of Sunday decorating the house for Christmas. We spent about $460 on decorations that morning (including a tree) because the place just didn’t feel festive enough.

Decorating is exhausting. I was so tired by the end of it that I ordered a pizza for dinner and fell asleep before it even arrived. I feel like I’m turning into a housewife.

Speaking of, Dale is micromanaging everyone and making us all hate our jobs. Luke is even talking to a recruiter about finding a new one. I’ve always loved my job now and now that I’m not having the same experience, I seriously want to quit. I know I shouldn’t give up that easily (and I won’t), but going to work everyday when you don’t like your job is really hard. I hope Brady proposes soon so we can get married and I can stay home and have a baby. Just kidding.

So Diana’s replacement started on Monday. Last week Dave told me that they’d hired someone – some man who had spent fifteen years with a luxury leather goods company. I didn’t realize they were going to replace her so soon (or at all) so I spent the next few days trying to catch up on all my work. I didn’t want him to think I was a slacker.

On Monday when I walked into work, the first person I saw was Luke.

“He’s here!” he hissed at me.

“How is he?” I whispered back.

Luke shook his head ominously. I took that as a sign that this new guy (Dale) was not cool. I nodded and walked past him toward my desk. There was a tall blonde man with a receding hairline lingering outside my office.

“Hiii!” he sang when he saw me. “You must be Reese?”

I nodded. “Hi. Dale? How are you?”

We shook hands and he said, “So what’s your story? What do you do here? Are you married? Kids?”

I laughed. “Nope, not married and definitely no children.” I briefly explained my job to him and he stood there with his hand on his chin like he was pondering.

“Well, we’ll talk more at the staff meeting, okay Reese?” he said.

I said okay and went in my office. I worked alone for a little while before meeting Luke in the design room. We were discussing ideas for next year when I felt someone standing behind me. I turned and Dale was standing there.

“Oh, hey,” I said like it wasn’t super creepy.

“What exactly are you working on?” he asked.

I explained to him that we were brainstorming and trying to find inspiration for upcoming collections.

“And how much time do you spend doing this?” Dale wanted to know.

I looked at Luke. “Um, I’m not sure. Maybe a couple hours a week. We like to get all of our ideas down so when it’s actually time to design we aren’t starting from scratch.”

“Ooookay,” he said sounding kind of skeptical. “I just want to make sure we aren’t paying you to socialize!” He laughed on the last part.

Later on at the staff meeting Dale was officially introduced to the staff. He gave this big flamboyant speech about how happy he is to be joining us and to turn things around. Luke and I looked at each other like, “What is there to turn around?” So that was our first sign of trouble.

I got home and started on dinner while I waited for Brady to come home. I logged onto Facebook and the first thing that popped up were some photos Brady was tagged in. Joy! The first one was taken on a webcam (hello, 2004!) and it looked like Anna was sitting down and Brady and a male I didn’t recognize were photobombing her. The next one was of Brady, Anna and a different guy sitting on a couch. Brady looks extremely under the influence and is leaning his head on Anna’s shoulder. The last one was a selfie of Brady and Anna.

I showed Brady the pictures when he got home and said, “Looks like you had fun!”

I guess he caught on to my sarcasm and asked, “Are you mad?” He sounded surprised and confused, like I had no right to be mad.

“No,” I replied lightly. “But how would you feel if I was out until 6:00 in the morning partying with my ex boyfriend?”

“I suppose I wouldn’t like it,” Brady said slowly.

“Of course you wouldn’t. Why would I be okay with it then?” I demanded.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think of it like that. She has a boyfriend and I have a girlfriend. I wanted you to come…”

“That’s not the point. It’s about respect, Brady. I’m sure Landon knows her name. Yes?”

Brady shrugged. “Landon knows your name.”

“Anyway.” I flipped my hair. “The way you went about it was shiesty. The whole weekend you were shiesty.”

Brady had the nerve to kind of laugh. I glared at him. “Is this funny?”

“No. I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say. The weekend was uncomfortable for me too, Reese,” he said.

“Why?” I exclaimed. “This is your family, not mine. You did nothing to make me feel comfortable even when your cousin was bullying me.”

I waited for him to say something, but he was silent.

“At some point you’re going to have to grow some balls, Brady. I’m definitely not going to put up with this shit,” I added.

Brady looked hurt. I felt kind of bad, but I totally, totally meant it. And he needed to hear it. I got up and finished dinner then ate by myself in the dining room. I cleaned a bit, took a shower and got in bed. I dozed off then felt Brady get in the bed a little while later.

He put an arm around me and I eagerly turned and kissed him. I can’t even control myself because he’s so adorable. I got on top of him, ready to hook up then go back to sleep, but Brady grabbed my wrists so I couldn’t move.

“Hey. I’m sorry about this weekend,” he said.

“Don’t let it happen again,” I said simply.

“Okay.”

At that point, I was fine with where we ended it but the next day I got frustrated and annoyed that we didn’t actually solve anything. Because we never do. At least we are getting along and texting each other all day though. I was sitting on a table in the design room texting Brady when I heard someone clear their throat. It was Dale.

“Oh, hey,” I said, standing up.

“Hey there. What are you working on?” he asked.

“Um, I’m waiting for Luke. We’re going next door for lunch.” I felt like he wouldn’t be satisfied with that answer so I added, “When we get back I have a phone meeting with a textile manufacturer.”

Dale tapped his chin. “Okay. I’ll see you when you get back.”

So Luke and I went and had lunch then came back and got to work. I locked myself in my office for a few hours and got a ton done. I didn’t want Dale to think I didn’t do anything. But maybe he did because later on, he found me by myself again in the design room and he asked, “How much are we paying you?”

I thought it was kind of inappropriate to ask me that plus doesn’t he have some way of looking that up himself? I asked our head of HR, Tracy, about it later. She informed me that I don’t have to (and shouldn’t) discuss my salary with anyone so now I don’t feel bad about not telling Dale.

That evening, Brady and I decided we are going to renovate his place. Since he doesn’t want to move at all, I thought it was great idea – and it was his. So we are going to get rid of the carpet in the dining room (carpet is so 90’s), paint our bedroom and the second bedroom (which I’m going to turn into a home office), get all new living room furniture (Brady’s is so blah), create a guest suite in the basement, and make the main living area in the basement less bachelor pad with more strategic decorating. I’m actually super excited. It’s almost as exciting as buying a whole new place!

The rest of the week kind of sucked because I was busy trying to impress Dale. I think we all were, and he just didn’t seem too enthused by really anything. At Friday’s staff meeting, he informed us that he has a lot of changes he wants to make – all of which he thinks will benefit the business. He talked about restructuring, merging, hiring, etc. It didn’t sound like anyone’s job was in jeopardy (yet), but I think that was everyone’s fear.

On Saturday night, Brady and I had plans to go to dinner with Kendra and John. Kendra and John picked out an upscale restaurant in a hotel so we had to dress up. I wore a black turtleneck dress, over the knee boots, and a faux fur jacket because it was fucking freezing out.

The menu was all about shared plates with a bunch of stuff I’ve never heard of. I just wanted nachos. The cocktail and dessert menus were really good though. Kendra seems really happy. Like freakishly happy. I don’t really get a chance to talk to her outside of our group texts everyday which I feel bad about, but she’s so busy. She hardly even responds.

But at dinner she kept looking at John with these weird glossy eyes, calling him “my love,” and touching his face. Like ew. But I think I’m kind of, a little bit jealous. There was a bar in the restaurant so after we finished eating we got a table by the bar and started drinking like we were back in college.

By the time we left the restaurant, we were all happy and drunk and super loud. We decided that since we were downtown and at a nice hotel, we would just get a room and stay there for the night. What a great idea! We didn’t even have anything to sleep in or any toiletries.

Kendra and I sent Brady and John to Walgreens to buy more alcohol (as if we needed it) and sat in the room waiting.

“Ken,” I whined. “I’m so jealous of your life. I want to be as happy as you are.”

She smiled her freakish married smile. “Then let yourself be happy.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Reese, if you love Brady, then just love him. You always make it so complicated. Don’t try to find every reason not to.”

I had so much to say, so many rebuttals (am I supposed to just forgive him if he cheats on me, like she did with John?), but I just said okay. And decided she was right.

The boys came back with vodka, cranberry ginger ale, and Cheetos Puffs for me. I love that Brady knew after that underwhelming fancy dinner, I needed something else. Love him for that. We started on the vodka and I blacked out.

I woke up this morning in the bed next to Brady. I was using my fur jacket as a pillow. Kendra and John were already gone – apparently the two of them didn’t need to sleep off all that alcohol.

“Brady!” I whined, waking him up. “I’m hungry and I feel like shit.”

“Me too,” he groaned.

We got up and called an Uber and had our driver stop at McDonald’s on the way home. Classy. We spent the day nursing our hangovers, working and online shopping (well, I did. Sephora has so many holiday gift sets and palettes that I cannot pass up!).

Kendra texted me saying, “I can’t believe we paid $400 to stay in a stupid hotel last night.”

I didn’t realize that she and John had covered the costs of the hotel, but promised her that Brady and I would take care of the hotel if we ever decide to do that again. Which we won’t.

Anyway, sorry this is kind of short! I’ve been so busy. Brady and I are flying to San Francisco on Tuesday and I have so much work to do before then. Does anyone else dread trips because of all the preparation it takes? I still need to do laundry, clean and pack, I have a meeting and two presentations at work and I have to do two interviews. Not excited about that at all. But if anyone has recommendations for things to do in San Fran, please let me know!

Brady waited until the very last minute to tell me that his cousin’s wedding in New York City was a black tie wedding. I was super frustrated because I don’t have any black tie attire just hanging out in my closet and I didn’t have time to shop because I was busy slaving away at work because Diana’s replacement was coming. More on that later. So anyway, I ended up finding a long black dress on my lunch break so it was fine but still. Men just don’t think ahead.

As soon as we got to New York, we went to the hotel where all of Brady’s family was staying and where the wedding reception was being held. It was already 8:00 New York time by the time we got there so we missed most of the annoying family stuff. We checked into our room and started unpacking and getting ready for bed when one of Brady’s other cousins called to say that they were going to the bar after dinner. My kind of people! So we quickly changed and met them at a bar in East Village.

Brady hardly ever talks about his cousins or his dad’s side of the family or really anything, if we’re being honest. So I wasn’t sure what to expect (although if they were partying in East Village I figured they were nothing like his mom’s family). On the way over, Brady gave me a super brief overview of the people we were meeting up with.

We were greeted at the door of this disgusting dive bar by a really big guy with red hair and an even redder face. He had on preppy khaki shorts and Birkenstocks even though it was chilly out and an NYU pullover. He reminded me of Jonah Hill before the weight loss transformation.

“Baby Brady!” he mock squealed and the two hugged.

When they pulled apart, Jonah elbowed Brady out of the way so he could see me and said, “Is this your special lady?”

“Yeah, this is Reese,” Brady replied.

The cousin stuck his hand out to shake mine and introduced himself as Landon. His hand was really clammy.

“No offense, but I’m not going to bother remembering your name. Brady has a different date every time I see him,” Landon said.

I scoffed, offended. I looked from Landon to Brady, unsure of what to say.

“I’m kidding!” Landon laughed, putting his big, meaty arm around me. I ducked away from him and glared at Brady. He shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal.

We walked to the bar where everyone else was. I was already ready to go because Landon had pissed me off, but also because the bar had graffiti on the walls, ceiling and floor. It was just not my scene and I didn’t want to ruin my shoes.

I met Landon’s brother, Logan, who was a hot lawyer. He had serious JFK vibes going on. Then there was another cousin, Matthew, who seemed older than all of us and Matthew’s wife, Dana. Honestly, none of us looked like we belonged in the bar with our bright colors, expensive shoes and clean nails, but I feel like they all just wanted to rebel.

Brady sat down and ordered a beer and at first I was too grossed out to sit down or drink anything. Then I realized that I couldn’t just stand there watching everyone else drink so I made Brady scoot over and I ordered a Jack and Coke. It just seemed fitting.

They started talking about the bride, Holly, and calling her a needy bitch. It was so rude. So I said, “Of course she’s needy, she’s getting married. She has every right to be a bridezilla.”

Landon said, “Hush it, you. What was your name again?”

I narrowed my eyes at him, preparing to rip him a new asshole but then he broke out into a huge grin and told me he was joking.

“You’re annoying,” I mumbled.

I didn’t want to alienate myself completely so I began talking to Logan. I started by asking if Landon was always like that. Logan gave Landon an amused look and chuckled.

“Yeah, Landon has his foot in his mouth about 50% of the time. The other 50% it’s fried chicken.”

So that’s how Logan and I became friends. He kind of talked like Brady, but much less serious. He seemed more laid back. I tried really hard not to be flirty at all, but I started to feel like we were in a job interview. I felt like Anna. And that’s just not me so I started being myself.

After we left the dive bar, we took the subway back to the hotel. Between the dive bar and taking public transportation, I thought Brady’s dad’s side of the family must be much less uptight than his mom’s side. We ordered a bottle of wine and hung out in Landon and Logan’s hotel room talking. I was really surprised when they opened the window and started smoking weed. They didn’t even discuss it, Landon just pulled out a joint and they started passing it around without any interruption to our conversation. Like, okay.

This was on Friday after the Paris terrorist attacks and they started talking about it. It was a huge news story and I decided to play Devil’s advocate. Maybe it was too soon, but I wasn’t trying to be insensitive at all. Brady looked surprised.

Landon gave me a look like he wanted to strangle me and said, “Oh you’re one of those people?”

“What people? It was just a question,” I replied.

Landon leaned over with his elbows on his knees and put his chin(s) in his hands. “Let me guess: you’re all for immigration so shit like this can happen on a daily basis here too?”

I totally shouldn’t have said anything. This was precisely why I don’t ever state my opinion about anything remotely political. I wasn’t about to argue with him so I grabbed Brady’s glass of wine and drank it. Landon started ranting and no one was really listening and eventually I started yawning loudly and Brady suggested we head to bed.

We hadn’t seen his parents since we arrived in New York, but we ran into them in the hallway.

“There you are!” Brady’s mom exclaimed. “I have called you over four times, Brady. I had no idea if you even made it.” She shot me a dirty look like it was somehow my fault that Brady didn’t answer her phone calls.

“I’m sorry. I haven’t checked my phone,” Brady said.

His mom looked back and forth between us like she was so frustrated and irate that she couldn’t even form words. Finally she said, “I will see you in the morning.”

“K, bye,” I said.

I swear she rolled her eyes at me before they walked off.

The next morning, we had to get up and get ready to go to breakfast with all of Brady’s family at the hotel. After my encounter with Landon, I was not excited about it. I vowed to just look pretty and keep my mouth shut the entire meal. We met Brady’s parents in the hallway so we could take the elevator down to breakfast together. His mom insisted. She took one look at my outfit and decided not to even greet me. I thought my sweater dress, boots and topknot were super New York and super appropriate. But whatever.

Breakfast was fine. No one really paid attention to me after the initial introduction and I was totally okay with it. They were all very pretentious though, just as I expected. Scallop omelettes were being served and one of the aunts said, “I wish they would have used sea scallops for this.” And then the table proceeded to have a fifteen minute conversation about sea scallops versus bay scallops. Like who fucking cares.

After breakfast, Brady’s parents invited us to go to some indoor garden with them. His mom explained that it was beautiful and serene and we could probably both benefit from visiting it. How can you benefit from a garden? But anyway, we agreed.

The garden was nice, I guess. Brady’s parents walked ahead of us hand in hand, looking at all the different greenery. Brady had been kind of distant since arriving in New York and neither of us were talking. Sometimes he just needs space so I didn’t push it. Occasionally I’d point out a pretty flower or something and he would just nod.

The wedding was that evening at a Catholic church near Times Square. The service and everything was so beautiful that I almost cried even though I hadn’t even met the bride and groom yet. I’m also not even Catholic.

We had a motorcade that took us back to the hotel for the reception. They’d transformed the ballroom into this really over the top purple and glittery scene that looked like it could have been in Frozen. I hated it. For those wondering, I want a minimalistic all white wedding and reception with no bling aside from my jewelry. I literally want to be the center of attention, obviously.

Anyway, I finally met Holly when she began making her way around the tables. She was a bit older than Brady, with a long sleeved wedding dress and a chignon. If Logan is JFK then she is Elizabeth Taylor. She is definitely the high society wannabe type. She hugged me and air kissed me on both cheeks then uttered the words I’d been waiting for someone to ask me all night. “I love your dress. Who’s it by?”

So we began discussing our attire and I let Holly in detail explain the development of her dress and jewelry (all made in Italy) from start to finish. I could tell she had not only been waiting for the topic to come up, but also that she’d been rehearsing it. I loved her.

I met a Serbian guy named Steven who was friends with the groom. He had big bushy eyebrows, a prominent nose, a fantastic jawline and he was very handsome. I talked to him for a little bit while I was checking out the chocolate fountain. He had a thick accent that made it hard to communicate, but I think he said he owns a solar factory or something. I really don’t know. I did that thing where I nodded and asked general questions that made it seem like I was listening. He suggested we exchange numbers, but I declined and went back to the table.

Later on, I got up to get more chocolate dipped strawberries and ran into Steven again. There was a live piano player and he grabbed my waist so I could dance with him. I suddenly got really hot and embarrassed that he was touching me like that.

“No, it’s okay,” I giggled uncomfortably while pulling away.

Steven like, growled then grabbed my wrist with one hand and kept the other hand on my waist like we were ballroom dancing. I tried to push him off without making a scene, but he was really strong and his arms were big.

“Seriously, stop,” I said sternly and then I felt a hand on my shoulder. I glanced over and saw a ringed hand and realized that it was Brady’s dad.

“Why don’t you join us back at the table?” he said in a low voice.

Steven seemed to get the hint and released me and I followed Brady’s dad back to our table feeling like a bimbo. I was annoyed to see that Landon was sitting in my chair and he and Brady were engrossed in deep conversation. Brady didn’t even look in my direction when I sat on the edge of his chair. No wonder his dad had to come save me.

I sat there thinking about what just happened and how it must have looked to everyone in the room. Like why do I always attract that kind of attention? I started freaking out and trying not to cry. I looked around and noticed Brady’s mom watching me, but she quickly averted her eyes. She was probably trying to figure out how she was going to get rid of me.

“So, you in?” I heard Landon ask Brady.

“Yeah. I’ll just need to change,” Brady said.

Landon saw me watching them and asked, “Is the girl coming?”

Brady looked at me like I knew what they were talking about. I didn’t even have the energy to tell Landon off for calling me “the girl” as if I don’t have a name and just shook my head no. When Landon got up to go back to his own table, Brady said, “Hey, are you okay?”

I glared at him. “I’m ready to go home.”

He nodded. “Yeah, me too.”

“Where are you going after this?” I asked.

“Just to a party with Landon in Brooklyn. Do you want to come?”

“You’re going all the way to Brooklyn? Hell no I’m not going.”

Brady looked down.

“And Landon is an asshole, by the way. I’m fucking sick of him.”

I think that was the last thing I said to Brady before we left the reception. We went upstairs and I immediately stripped my dress off and took a shower. When I got out, Brady had changed into jeans, a lightweight gray hoodie and Converse. He looked much more edgy than usual and I was not happy about it. I couldn’t believe he was going to a party without me. I know that sounds ridiculous and bratty, but what was I supposed to do while he was traipsing around Brooklyn?

“Have fun,” I said and walked past him to the bed.

He stood there awkwardly for about a minute then said, “Bye. Love you,” before walking out.

I was exhausted and fell asleep right away. Do you know what time Brady got back? Six o’clock in the fucking morning. I know New York is the city that never sleeps, but that’s ridiculous. I’d woken up a few times in the night and looked at the time and noted that he wasn’t there. When I finally heard the door open, I sat up and looked at my phone.

“Are you kidding me?” I asked.

Brady smirked at me then got in bed and we both went to sleep. We had to wake up three hours later to get ready to come back to Chicago. Apparently Brady’s mom had called him half a dozen times earlier before they left to go back to Boston so we didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to them. And Brady was too afraid to call her back.

When we were settled into our seats on the plane, on our way home, I let Brady know how unhappy I was with his behavior on the trip.

“Landon was rude and you didn’t do anything about it. I get that he’s your cousin and everything but you could have at least stepped in and told him his comments weren’t cool,” I said.

“That’s just how he is. I told you that before, Reese. He didn’t mean to be rude,” Brady replied.

“Don’t defend him. He was being rude. I don’t care how many girls you’ve introduced to him, but he needs to respect me.”

“He was joking about that.”

Neither of us said anything for a few minutes then I said, “Where were you all night?”

“At a party. I told you,” Brady said.

“It must have been some party.”

“Yeah. I wish you would have come. Actually, Anna was there…”

I didn’t even have the energy to argue with him about it. Was I supposed to be excited that he’d hung out with Anna until 6:00 in the morning? I just said, “Oh.”

Brady pulled out his laptop and I started thinking of a plan of action for when we got back to Chicago. I really wanted to pack my shit and stay with Kendra and John for a few days.

But when we landed, I wanted nothing more than to get in bed and snuggle with my boo (even though it was like two in the afternoon). On the ride home I suggested we order a pizza and recuperate all day and Brady agreed that it was a good idea. I couldn’t even stay up long enough for the pizza to be delivered. I was still so tired. I woke up around 7:00 PM on Sunday and Brady was watching a movie in the living room. Even though we had a tough weekend together, my heart was suddenly so full of love for him again (😖) and I just wanted to hug and squeeze him to death.

I have so much more to tell y’all, but it’ll have to wait. Like I said, I got a new boss and I’ve been working my ass off the past week and a half. I’m tired. Hopefully I’ll have another post up by Friday. Miss y’all!

I tried to talk Brady into getting a hotel in the city so we wouldn’t have to stay with his parents, but he wouldn’t do it. He said it might offend his parents. Who fucking cares. We are both adults who need privacy and alone time. I mean, I guess I get it. If I told my mom that Brady and I were coming to Houston, but not staying with them her feelings would be hurt. But that’s different, right?

Anyway, Brady wasn’t having it which was annoying. He’d told me on the plane that his parents made reservations for us to have dinner in Boston which was also annoying because I was wearing super casual travel clothes and I would need to change into something nicer.

When we landed, I ran to a bathroom with my suitcase and changed into a dress that probably wasn’t appropriate for a modest dinner with Brady’s parents, but it was the first thing I saw that wasn’t completely wrinkled. When I walked out of the bathroom, Brady was waiting for me and his eyes got big.

“Wow,” he said, slowly appraising my body. “You look nice.”

“Thanks!” I chirped, flipping my hair. I grabbed my suitcase and started to walk away, but Brady grabbed my free hand and pulled me close to him.

“I love you,” he said softly.

“Love you too,” I said and tried to pull away, but Brady slipped his hands around my waist and kissed me. Meanwhile I was still hanging on to my suitcase. I giggled and pulled away. I also hate PDA.

So we walked hand in hand outside to where his parents and the car were waiting. Brady’s mom spotted me and gave me the once over, completely judging my short dress and my boobs. I can’t help my boobs.

The first thing she said was, “Oh my, aren’t you cold?”

Brady and his father hugged and I stood there awkwardly, not knowing what to do. I had a peacoat in my suitcase, but I’d totally forgotten to get it out.

“Kind of,” I finally said.

“Well, let’s go. We don’t want to miss our reservation,” she sighed. We walked to the waiting car and I noted that she hadn’t acknowledged Brady at all. So rude.

Brady’s dad got in the front seat so the three of us climbed in the backseat, with me in the middle. We got settled in and Brady rested his hand way too high on my thigh. I glanced at him and he was staring out the window.

“How was your flight?” Brady’s mom asked, not even looking in our direction.

Brady didn’t say anything so I said, “It was fine.”

We rode in silence the the whole way there. We went to an oyster bar. As we sat down Brady’s dad looked at me grinning and said, “I hope you like oysters, Reese.”

Brady’s mom glanced at me like she didn’t care if I liked oysters or not.

“I do. I’ve never had them in New England though,” I admitted.

“This is the only place they are worth getting,” the dad said.

I smiled politely. Once our server came, Brady’s dad went ahead and ordered for us: an oyster platter, scallops, clam chowder, and a bottle of rosé. The table was awkwardly silent after our server walked away. Brady and I were sitting next to each other and the parents across from us, and I had no choice but look down because it was so uncomfortable. I cannot understand why Brady’s parents make everything so awkward.

“Reese, how are your parents?” Brady’s mom finally asked me.

“They’re fine,” was all I could think to say.

“Is your mother working yet?” she continued.

“Um.” I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to explain to her that my mom hasn’t worked since I was in high school. Brady’s mom seems pretty adamant that women need to work and make their own money. I’m not sure how she knew that my mom doesn’t work though because I’ve never told her. “She runs a bakery so that’s her full time job now.”

Brady’s mom looked at the dad and back at me like she was confused. “I thought she told me she was a licensed therapist.”

“She is. She just wanted a change of pace. She went into business with a friend,” I explained.

“It just seems like such a bizarre move. A bakery? But…as long as she’s happy, I suppose.”

Brady’s dad cut in and started talking about careers and how the average person changes careers three times in their life. And how my mom probably got burnt out and wanted something less serious and opening a bakery was the perfect way to do that. Brady’s mom shot him a look.

“How do you feel career wise?” she asked me.

“I feel good. I’m really happy with where I am now,” I replied.

“Where do you see yourself in ten years?”

Here came the interview questions. I was annoyed with her so much that I decided to be truthful and not just say what I thought would please her. Plus, Kat told me she was a good judge of character. If I made up some story, she would probably know.

“I’d like to retire early and become a stay at home mom. Then once my children are old enough to start school, I’d like to get into philanthropy, maybe even start my own charity.”

Everyone stared at me and to my surprise, Brady’s mom actually cracked a smile at me. “Really? What kind of charity?”

“I’m not sure yet. I like animals. I like to help the homeless people in Chicago, too.”

She nodded. “I’m on the board of directors for an education charity. It’s so rewarding, Reese.”

I smiled and nodded.

Her smile quickly faded and she turned to Brady. “Elbows off. the. table.”

I watched as Brady quickly removed his arms from the table and put his hands in his lap. We didn’t talk again until after the food came. We ate in silence for a little while then Brady’s mom asked, “How’s Lindsey?”

“She’s doing well. She seems to like her new job and Chicago,” Brady answered.

“I’m surprised she actually went through with it. Her mother said she was a bit afraid of moving to another state,” the mom said.

“She mentioned it was either Chicago or New York so she was going to have to move to a new state regardless. Just Chicago is a little bit farther,” Brady said.

“Well, I guess she had both you and Anna in either city so she would never be completely alone. Reese, have you gotten the chance to meet Lindsey?”

“Yeah, she stayed with us for like a month,” I answered.

Brady’s mom’s brow furrowed and she asked, “What do you mean?”

Brady grabbed my thigh and spoke up. “Lindsey stayed with Reese her first month in Chicago. I told you that.” I noticed that his neck was starting to turn red. Oh. Ohhh. His parents probably didn’t know that I was living with him because obviously they wouldn’t approve. I couldn’t help being a little bit annoyed at him for lying though.

“I always thought you and Lindsey would end up together, son. You were always so close. Didn’t you think they would, sweetheart?” Brady’s mom said, turning to the dad.

“Ugh, Mom, no,” Brady scoffed.

He pulled out his phone while his parents discussed he and Lindsey’s potential relationship. A few seconds later I got a text from him. I figured he would explain why he didn’t tell his parents we are living together or apologize for his mom. But instead, the message said, “I can’t wait to get you out of that dress.”

I wanted to reply, “How are you going to do that when your mom is going to do everything in her power to keep us away from each other tonight?” But instead I put my phone down and blushed. Brady put his hand on my thigh and kept inching it up higher as his mom continued questioning us.

“Reese, have you considered owning?”

“Brady, have you explored opportunities in Massachusetts?”

By the time the check came, his hand was practically up my dress. Luckily the tablecloth was covering us up because I can only imagine the fit Brady’s mom would throw if she knew he was feeling me up at dinner. Brady didn’t let go of me as we made our way back out to the car. It was like he couldn’t keep his hands off me. Maybe I should wear that dress more often.

When we got back to the house, we were all really tired and decided to retire to bed.

“Reese, you know where you’re staying, I assume?” Brady’s mom said giving me the most condescending smile.

I nodded even though I had full intentions of sneaking back up and fucking the shit out of her son later. Last year when I visited Brady’s parents with him, his mom made me sleep in a room in the basement with absolutely no cell phone reception. I think she did it on purpose. But I ended up sneaking up to Brady’s room anyway so joke’s on her.

I went downstairs and stalled for time for about an hour and a half (squats, jumping jacks, brushing my hair 100 times, etc) then showered and put on boy shorts and a sheer white v-neck. Brady was waiting for me when I got to his room. We hadn’t discussed that we would hookup, but we both just knew. Especially after how frisky he’d been acting all day.

“Hi,” I greeted him, straddling him on the bed. “Why didn’t you come downstairs and visit me?”

“It’s scary down there,” he kind of pouted. He flipped me over on the bed and we proceeded to have wild sex for an hour. But we had to be really quiet. It was tough. I like to be spanked really, really hard, but we couldn’t without being super loud. We tried though.

Afterward, Brady mumbled some stuff and tried to snuggle me as he fell asleep.

“Love you,” I whispered and kissed him.

He mumbled something back and I giggled before slipping out. I tiptoed out and stealthily shut the door behind me, but I almost jumped out of my skin when someone came out of the darkness. It was Brady’s mom.

“Holy shit!” I exclaimed, clutching my chest. “You scared me.” She was walking out of the kitchen with a mug in her hands. It was obvious what just went down (especially if she had been hanging outside that door for any amount of time) but she didn’t say anything.

“Hello. I’m having a cup of tea. Do you like tea?” she said.

I nodded. She motioned for me to follow her in the kitchen and because I was still kind of freaked out, I followed her. I sat at the island and waited for her to make my tea.

“Is chamomile okay?” Brady’s mom asked.

I nodded. “Yes.” I was suddenly acutely aware that my shirt was super sheer and my nipples were on full display. I crossed my arms across my chest and hoped that helped.

Once the tea was ready, Brady’s mom brought the mug to me and sat adjacent to me at the island.

“Well, we are glad you two could make it,” she said.

I nodded, taking a sip of the tea.

“I know Brady doesn’t want to be here. He’s made that abundantly clear.”

I didn’t know what to say so I didn’t say anything.

“I just want Brady to want to be around us more. His father has been sick. It’s complicated, but he’s going to be okay.”

“Does Brady know his dad is sick?” I asked. I know Brady never tells me anything, but he hadn’t mentioned his dad at all. And definitely didn’t act like anything was wrong.

“Brady knows. He doesn’t know how serious it got, but he and Hunter are both aware of the state of their father’s health. And it breaks my heart that Brady doesn’t even want to come home for the party. Who knows how many more of these we will be able to have.”

“Is it that bad?” I suddenly felt terrible for how bitchy I’d reacted when Brady said he would be attending his dad’s party. He’s known all along that something was going on with his dad and I made him feel like shit for wanting to spend time with him. I really am an evil person.

“No. But you never know, Reese. You can’t take anything or anyone for granted. That’s the message I’m trying to get across.” Brady’s mom has always look really cold to me. Emotionless. But right then she looked really vulnerable, almost like she might cry. I wonder if that’s how I look when I open up. I felt awful for myself and for Brady.

“I don’t think it’s like that. Brady did want to come,” I said.

“Nevertheless, we are happy you’re here,” she said, completely ignoring me.

We both sipped our tea and Brady’s mom said, “I really enjoy chamomile before bed.”

“I do too. I love green tea, too,” I agreed.

Without a word, she stood up and walked to the cabinets. I was ready to get out of there and get to sleep so I stood up, thinking I was dismissed. Brady’s mom came back over and slid a few packets of tea toward me.

“They’re straight from Asia. It’s very good,” she explained.

“Thanks.”

“I imagine you’re exhausted.” Brady’s mom paused and looked at me expectantly so I nodded. “Get some rest. I’ll be making breakfast at 8:00.”

She escorted me all the way to the stairs I guess to make sure I didn’t sneak back into Brady’s room. Our talk made me feel really weird. Like it made me feel bad. I’ve always been okay with not really liking Brady’s parents because they don’t seem to like me and don’t ever talk to me. I decided that I should probably make more of an effort because obviously they don’t know how to.

The next morning we had breakfast together in the dining room and everything went back to being awkward. It was silent for the first ten minutes then Brady’s mom said, “Son, there’s a research role open at the university that I want you to look into.”

Brady didn’t say anything – he didn’t even look up from his plate.

Out of curiosity and to break the silence I asked, “What university?”

No one said anything. Brady and his dad continued eating, and the mom looked at me like I was stupid then took a drink from her coffee.

After breakfast, Brady and I took one of the cars to town so he could get one of his tattoos touched up. Apparently Brady won’t go to anyone except his original tattoo artist. And since we were there, I suddenly got the urge to get a tattoo also. I always wanted one when I was a teenager, but I grew out of it because there’s nothing I want on my body permanently. I realized that I still don’t want anything.

After we left the tattoo shop, we went across the street and got ice cream. I wanted to tell Brady about the conversation I had with his mom, but I wasn’t sure how or if I even should. Obviously if Brady wanted me to know that something is going on with his father then he would have told me.

So I asked, “How is your dad? He hasn’t said much this weekend,” to give Brady a clear opening.

He shrugged. “He’s all right.”

“Your relationship with your parents stresses me out,” I blurted out.

Brady’s brow furrowed. “Why?”

“Because y’all never talk to each other and it’s really awkward. It shouldn’t be like that. You should be able to talk to your parents about almost anything.”

“Well, my parents aren’t like your parents. You know that.”

I could feel him getting defensive so I threw my arm around him. “I know. But I think you should try a little harder. They won’t be around forever.”

He ignored me so I dropped it.

That night we all got ready for Brady’s dad’s annual party. I wore a modest black dress with a feather trimmed hem with sexy underwear and thigh highs underneath. Sorry, not sorry Mom-in-law.

On the ride there she said, “Reese, what a great lip color. What is that?”

So we were friends again! I beamed. I dug the Dior lipstick out of my bag and read her the name then asked if she wanted to borrow any. I really just wanted to show Brady that if he tried, he actually could talk to his parents. I know I have some nerve doing that.

“Oh,” Brady’s mom said, awkwardly taking the lipstick from me. She dabbed it on her lips so it just barely showed up and handed it back to me.

Brady was watching the encounter and I shrugged at him like, “Yeah, we’re friends. So?”

The party was the same exact set up as last year. Open bar, food, no music. Since Brady’s mom and I are friends now, I said, “We should get some music playing.”

Everyone ignored me. Brady’s parents disappeared into the crowd so Brady and I went to the bar to get wine. Wine makes me a happy and affectionate drunk so I wasn’t worried about drinking too much. Plus the party was kind of boring so I had no choice, but drink wine until I was sweating. Brady was still being super affectionate and kept a hand on my hip or back while we mingled with everyone. People were asking me where I went for undergrad like they assumed I went to grad school or something. I guess it was probably Brady’s mom’s education friends. So now I feel like I need to continue my schooling (just kidding, I barely survived four years).

Brady’s ex-girlfriend, Anna, was there. She was there last year too so I wasn’t surprised. I didn’t think Brady was going to speak to her unless I went to the bathroom or something, but she walked right up to us. She was with a guy in glasses and a bow tie who I thought looked gay and a girl with a pixie haircut and flats who I also thought looked gay.

Anna said, “Hey!” really loud like she was shocked to see Brady at his own parents’ party. They hugged and it wasn’t like a polite, dainty hug, it was a full on embrace with Anna’s face buried in his chest. It was really too much.

They pulled away and Brady said, “This is Reese.”

Anna turned to me and awkwardly waved like she wasn’t sure if we should hug or shake hands. So I stuck out my hand to shake hers. “Nice to meet you.”

She gave me a flimsy handshake which I didn’t expect from her. She was wearing a shapeless black shift dress, black tights, and basic black pointy pumps. I was wearing fucking feathers. How does Brady go from her to me? I just do not understand. She is really pretty though, I’ll admit that. Especially because I could tell she wasn’t wearing a drop of makeup. Her wavy hair went just past her shoulders and I could tell she put no effort into styling it. She’s the kind of girl who is too busy with work and being smart to do her hair, but it still comes out looking amazing. She introduced us to her two friends, who traveled from New York with her for the party.

“So what’s new with you?” she asked Brady and playfully swatted him on the chest.

Brady shrugged. “Business as usual.”

“Reese, are you in the medical field as well?” Anna asked me, pushing her hipster glasses up on her face.

“No.” I could feel everyone waiting for me to elaborate so I added, “I work in home decor.”

“Sales?” Anna nodded like she totally understood.

I think I was just more threatened by her then I intended to be because I said, “Uh, no. I head a product development team and we design four to six collections a year. My background is in marketing and PR.”

“Ohh,” Anna said. “I forgot that there’s people who do stuff like that.”

The fuck was that supposed to mean? I gave Brady a look like, “Get this girl,” so he cut in and asked Anna’s friends what they do for a living. I nodded like I was listening, but really I was wondering if I had any reason to hate her.

“What are you doing after this?” Anna suddenly asked.

Brady shrugged and looked at me. I shrugged back. As far as I knew, we were going back to his parents’ house to sneak and have sex.

“We’re going to a party in Southie. Come!” Anna enthused.

“Maybe,” Brady said.

“Let me know, okay?” Anna said.

“Okay.”

We all started to say our goodbyes and Anna told me it was “so wonderful” to meet me.

“Yeah, you too,” I said sounding super ingenuine. I didn’t even mean to. Oh well.

Brady’s mom found us and wanted to hang out for a little while. I couldn’t help thinking I was the reason she was being nicer and more fun. Once the night started to wind down, Brady asked if I wanted to go to the party with Anna and her friends. I really didn’t want to go because I was tired and wanted to get out of my clothes so I made a face and shrugged.

Brady smiled. “Me neither. I’m going to go find her and tell her.”

Once Brady walked away, his mom turned to me and put an arm around my waist. “Are you two about ready to go, darling? We are becoming tired.”

Darling? Can you believe Brady’s mom called me darling? I guess wine has the same affect on her as it does to me.

“Yes. I’ll go grab Brady and we will meet you outside,” I replied.

I slipped away and went to find Brady and/or Anna. I figured he hadn’t even found her yet, but we could leave and he could text her that we declined her invitation. But I spotted both of them near the bar talking. They shook hands which I thought was weird, and then Brady put his hand in his pocket. Anna turned and walked away. It looked like a drug deal. Lauren and I hung out with drug dealers enough in college for me to know what a drug deal looks like.

I stormed to Brady. “What did she just give you?” I demanded.

“What are you talking about?” he asked, seemingly surprised to see me.

“I saw Anna just give you something. I’m not stupid. What was it?” I said.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Brady was looking at me like I was a psychopath and he honestly didn’t know what I was talking about. But I know better now.

“You two are fucking weird. I don’t trust her and I don’t trust you.”

“I’ve given you no reason not to trust me.”

“You are lying to my face right now!” I exclaimed.

Brady sighed. “Come on. We aren’t doing this right now. Let’s go.”

We met back up with his parents and climbed back into the car to go home. Brady’s dad fell asleep almost immediately and his mom stared out the window. I wanted to continue our argument, but it was way too quiet to even talk. So I got out my phone and started texting Brady all these messages about if he was on drugs he needed to let me know so I could get him some help. I watched him open the message, glare at me and then put his phone back in his pocket.

So when we got back to the house, I said goodnight to Brady’s parents (I even gave my new best friend a hug) and went downstairs without saying anything to my crackhead boyfriend.

I showered and got in bed. I was a little annoyed that I didn’t have any cell signal because I wanted to keep chastising Brady about being on drugs and buying it at his parents party, no less.

I was laying there reading on the iPad when the door opened. Brady. I rolled my eyes and said, “What do you want?”

“I miss you,” he said, sitting at the end of the bed. He found my foot through the blanket and started massaging it.

“Have you taken the drugs Anna gave you yet? The TSA dogs are going to smell them on you if you try to take them back to Chicago. You will go to jail,” I said.

Brady threw his head back and laughed. Not because it was funny, because it was ridiculous.

“Anna didn’t give me drugs. God, what goes in your head?”

“What did she give you?”

“She was returning something. My mom gave her something a few years ago and she felt it was only right to return it.”

I eyed him suspiciously. “Oh, really? What was it? And why is she just now returning it if you broke up like three years ago?”

“Because my mom gave it to her. It was a gift.”

“What is it, Brady?!” I practically screamed.

He looked down and continued massaging my foot. I snatched it away and he looked at me like he was wounded.

“Hmm? Tell me,” I continued.

“I don’t think it’s any of your business, Reese,” Brady said softly.

I gasped. “You are so fucking rude.”

“Not everything is about you! This has absolutely nothing to do with you, Reese! You know I’m not on drugs. I can’t believe you even went there.”

“Well, you lie about everything and you’re so secretive that I wouldn’t know.”

Brady looked like he might cry. I’ve never seen him cry and I instantly felt terrible.

“I know you’re not on drugs. I’m sorry. I just want to know what was going on,” I added.

Brady shrugged and looked down. I got up on my knees and threw my arms around him, hoping that would count for something. He hugged me back then stood up.

“Goodnight. I’ll see you in the morning.”

I held on to his hand and pouted. “Stay and hang out a little bit.”

Brady sat back down. “What do you want to do?”

Instead of answering I kissed him and we ripped each other’s clothes off and hooked up. Then we got in the shower and had sex there too. Plus his parents’ room was so far away that we didn’t even have to be quiet. He finally went back to his room at like 4:00 am.

Brady came downstairs and woke me up at like 9:00 so we could have breakfast then make it to the airport in time. I threw a fit and whined about how tired I was. He was smacking my ass when I heard his mom say, “It’s already 9:15. We really need to get going.”

I was completely naked so I quickly grabbed the blanket to cover myself up. I was laying on my stomach, but still.

“We’re coming,” Brady said.

We didn’t end up having time for breakfast and the ride to the airport was completely silent. I thought I had made a breakthrough with Brady’s mom, but she was being as bipolar as ever. She gave me the stiffest hug when they dropped us off and I wanted to scream, “Do you like me or not?!” Maybe she was uncomfortable because she saw so much of my bare body over the course of the weekend. Oopsss.

The week started off pretty dramatically. The office was a kind of chaotic with Diana being gone. Her presence just made everyone work better and harder and without her, we just weren’t quite sure what to do with ourselves. Some people were acting kind of unruly and they weren’t listening to me when I suggested they get to work because of course, I’m not Diana. I went to Dave to inform him of what was going on and he didn’t believe me that there was a problem! He claimed the office was still running just as smoothly. So I was really annoyed that nothing was getting done and no one cared.

On Monday, Diana emailed me and said she wanted to talk to me about something. I already knew (thought) she wanted to talk to me about working for her. I mean obviously. Why else would she need to urgently speak to me? I told her I would be free to chat later in the afternoon and she ended up calling me on my office phone.

“Reese, hi. Can you hear me? I’m calling from my cell and people always have trouble hearing me,” she said after I answered.

“Yes I can hear you. How are you?” I said back.

“Look, I’m going to be upfront with you. I need you to work for me. Well, with me. I’m going to be working with a larger firm to get started and they are looking for a director of marketing. But you’d have to move to Dallas. Before you say no, I want you to think about it. Think about your career. It would be such a great step for you and I know you’d be a shoo-in. They’d obviously pay your relocation fee and match your salary. I’ll give you a call in a few days and we’ll talk about it, okay?” Diana explained.

I laughed. I wanted to tell her right away that I had no interest in moving to Dallas, but decided I would think about it like she told me to.

So I thought about it for the next two days. As much as I want to work with/for Diana again, I have no interest in moving to Dallas. I love Chicago and Brady and everything I have here. And then I started thinking, if I’m going to consider moving to Dallas then I may as well move home to Houston. I’m not sure why, but I was really missing my family a lot more than normal. I started thinking that I could move to Houston, get the penthouse apartment in my grandmother’s building and manage the property so she can finally retire. I don’t know what was going on with me.

I figured I needed to break up with Brady if I was going to move one thousand miles away so I was stressing about having to talk to him about it. It was Wednesday and I thought I should bring it up sooner rather than later, but Luke invited me and some people from the office out for drinks after work.

I stayed out until like 1:00 AM and to my surprise, Brady was still up working. He made a big show of looking at his watch then saying, “Oh. You’re finally home.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, just above a whisper.

Brady gave me a look like he was concerned and then I just burst into tears because I was drunk and because all I do is cry lately. Brady motioned for me to come to him and I shuffled over.

“What’s going on?” he asked me.

“I don’t know!” I sobbed, suddenly not wanting to ever leave his side, let alone move all the way to Houston.

“Why are you crying?” Brady asked.

“Just because I love you.”

He didn’t say anything and I just laid there crying for a minute. Then we got in bed and I explained everything. I couldn’t quite put into words how I was feeling and Brady’s eyebrows furrowed like he wasn’t following along.

“Wait. So are you considering going to Dallas for Diana or not?” he asked.

“No. I mean, I want to work with her and do marketing and stuff, but I have no interest in moving to Dallas right now. Should I? I don’t know what to do. Do you want me to leave?” I answered.

“No, of course I don’t want you to leave. But if this is going to be the best career move for you right now then I think you should at least consider it. Especially if you’re unhappy with where you are now. This could be a really great opportunity for you.”

“I’m not unhappy. The whole office is just missing Diana. It should be okay once we figure out how to operate without her.”

“I don’t think you should give her a definite answer until you discuss it with her more.”

I nodded. “Okay.”

The next morning, I decided to work from home. After talking to Brady, I felt much, much better and was no longer considering moving anywhere. I got out my laptop and started working and at around 9:30 I heard the front door open. I assumed it was Lindsey because she had left for work not long before, but to my surprise it was Brady. And he was carrying a box of donuts.

“Hey. I got you something to get you through the day,” he said with a smile.

I squealed and hugged him. I’m glad he’s trying harder to be nicer to me. So I sat on the couch all day eating those fucking donuts. By the time Brady and Lindsey were due home, I actually wanted to die because I was so disgusted with myself. I swore off donuts months ago.

That night Brady and I made plans to visit his brother Hunter and his wife in San Francisco for Thanksgiving. Hunter and his wife (Dominique) won’t be attending the party in Boston next weekend or the wedding in New York so they decided to do Thanksgiving together. And Brady actually invited me to go. I’ve never been to San Francisco so I said yes and I’m really excited. Plus we are going to go for the whole week so we can do other stuff.

We met with Laura on Saturday morning. It was pretty good, we really just sat around talking. She didn’t question us at all and just let us talk and ask her questions. Maybe she just wants to ease into it because last time we were both there it went so haywire.

After we left Laura’s office, we stopped at the grocery store so we could get stuff to eat because at the last minute we decided we would have a few people over on Saturday night. I picked up Cheetos Puffs, Cheezits, birthday cake Oreos, store made hummus, and hot dogs. Best host ever! Brady wasn’t impressed with my selections and got some pretty pretentious options for his pretentious friends.

I didn’t plan on wearing a costume, but when our first few guests arrived and they were in full on costume I knew I needed something. So I rushed to the bathroom and did a quick deer makeup look that’s been popular this year. It was actually really fucking cute. I didn’t have deer antlers or a costume or anything obviously so I just wore a dress and fringey shoes. Hey, at least I tried.

So at first, the only guests we had were the usual suspects: Lindsey, Kendra, John, Jacob, Stacey, Dan, etc. Preston also came with Joe, Nicole and Lexi, and Luke came with a girl. Preston and I kind of made up, but I think he’s just so concerned with Joe that he forgot we had a little fight. I guess that’s okay.

So we were all just hanging out and Lexi grabbed my arm excitedly. “Kyle’s coming.”

I snatched my arm away and put my hands up so she knew how much I disapproved. “Here?”

“Yeah. That cool?”

I looked around for Brady so I could warn him and spotted him outside on the patio, smoking with his friends.

“I mean, I guess it’s fine,” I said slowly. I wasn’t sure how I was even supposed to tell her to uninvite him.

Luckily, the place started filling up, really fast so maybe I could avoid him. When Brady and I discussed it, we said we would just invite some of our closest friends, but it started to feel like a frat party. When I walked to the kitchen to get more tequila, I literally didn’t recognize a single person eating my Cheetos. I was not happy.

But whatever. It was Halloween so I was going to have fun. One of the random ass guys in the kitchen took a double tequila shot with me then I asked him to make the hot dogs for us. While I waited for them to be done, I decided that I’d had enough of my heels so I took them off and put them under the sink. #reeseproblems #reesesolutions

I elbowed my way back to the living room and found Luke and his friend. They weren’t drunk enough for my standards so I dragged them to the kitchen for hot dogs and tequila. Right as I bit into my dog, I heard a loud roar in the living room as if a celebrity had just arrived. Obviously I needed to know who was causing all this commotion and imagine my disdain when I saw that it was Kyle. How did so many people at my party know him? So annoyed. I elbowed my way through the crowd so I could greet him.

“Cute costume, Reese,” he said, tapping my nose.

I glared at him and his stupid Cubs baseball jersey. “You get the award for the laziest costume ever, congrats.”

“Thanks, cutie,” Kyle said just as Lexi made her way through the crowd and threw her arms around his neck. He kind of bent her back and leaned down to her and they started full on making out right there. I could literally hear all the saliva. I obviously don’t care, but like, no. That’s disgusting.

“Y’all are gross,” I said and walked away.

I ran into Preston almost immediately and he said, “What’s going on downstairs?”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

He shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe go see.”

Curious, I slipped through the crowd and bounded down the stairs. The first thing I saw was a girl’s fucking tits. She was wearing a small bumble bee costume, but the guy next to her was pulling it down and trying to like suck on her boobs. She was half trying to push him off, but obviously enjoying the attention. They were on the couch next to two other guys and one of them was smoking out of a bong. There was a couple kneeling at the coffee table and the girl was recording the guy with her phone and squealing, “Mollyyyy!” That’s when I realized he was crushing it up and that they were going to snort it. And there were people at the bar actually snorting stuff. Gross! I was horrified and decided to go get Brady so we could kick them out.

Brady was walking back inside with a beer in his hand when I found him. He’d worn regular weekend clothes with a white doctor jacket over them for his costume. So maybe he gets the laziest costume award.

“Oh my gosh,” I started. “There are people downstairs doing Molly and Coke and probably acid and shrooms and all that other stuff.”

I expected Brady to be pissed or upset or have some reaction but he just stared at me.

“Can we kick them out? It’s just not that kind of party. I’ll do it, I just want you to go with me,” I continued.

He continued staring at me. Probably having hallucinations from doing drugs with them (obviously he must have been since he didn’t even have a reaction to people doing drugs in his house). I heard a girl shout his name and some chick and her boyfriend came over to greet him. Brady introduced me, but I don’t remember their names because I was so annoyed. Am I allowed to be annoyed?

Since Brady didn’t seem to care, I decided to just have fun and avoid the basement. Turns out I totally love Joe and I can see why Preston is obsessed with him. He’s so fun and cute! He’s like me!

I woke up disgustingly early on Sunday morning. I wasn’t hungover though which is a plus. I watched tv in bed for a little while until Brady woke up. He got up to assess the damage then came back and announced that we should probably clean. I wanted to refuse since the party guests were primarily his friends, but that’s mean so we both cleaned. Brady found my shoes under the sink and was very confused as to how they got there. Signs of a good time. Afterwards, we went to lunch at this really expensive place. Brady’s idea. I got an ahi tuna steak, prawns and roasted vegetables. The portions were small and I still wanted to eat so I insisted on getting gelato afterwards. And then we met up with Brady’s friend and his girlfriend at a bar. Sunday Funday?

I didn’t drink much and I was counting Brady’s beers. I know. I have some nerve monitoring someone else’s drinking. So I didn’t say anything.

Anyway, I actually haven’t heard from Diana since last Monday. She called me on Thursday and left a message because I was busy, but when I called back she didn’t answer and hasn’t returned my call. I’m going to talk to her about it more, but I really, really don’t plan on moving to Dallas. Or Houston for that matter. I had like a midlife crisis last week. I have no idea what was going on with me, but it was scary. I’m back to normal now though!

Wednesday was Lindsey’s birthday so after work we met up at a bar for food and drinks. It was mostly Brady and Lindsey’s mutual guy friends, but Lindsey had also invited a guy from work, Cody. Lindsey isn’t a super gossipy girly girl like me so she hasn’t mentioned crushing on a guy from work. But when I saw the way Lindsey looked when Cody arrived, I realized. And suddenly I was so excited for her!

There was also a baseball game on so everyone was really excited for that. Brady was basically ignoring me so I had to entertain myself by drinking and talking to one of Brady’s coworkers. He has a wife and kids at home which is cute, but I began to get bored so I started telling him about me and Brady’s future plans.

He listened for a little while then he laughed and said, “Does Brady know about all of this?”

And I’m like, “Obviously yes. We planned it all together.” He made it sound like I’m some sort of crazy person.

After the game, we all just kind of sat there until I finally said, “Do y’all wanna go somewhere else?”

Everyone looked at each other then agreed. So we walked a few blocks to a brand new bar that just opened. We got a table and ordered Moscow mules. No one was really talking so I asked, “Who won the game?” just to make conversation. Literally everyone glared at me.

Brady put his arm around me and leaned close. “It wasn’t a good game. They aren’t happy about it.”

I shrugged and sipped my drink. What a bunch of babies. Since everyone was being antisocial, Brady and I sat there talking and being cutesy. I got bored and wanted to go somewhere else, but only Lindsey and Cody decided to go with us. Everyone else needed to go cry about the baseball game.

Even though I’d eaten at the first bar, the next bar had steak nachos on the menu and obviously I had to order them. They were phenomenal, obviously. I decided to get to know Cody and make sure I approved of Lindsey seeing him. They work together as business analysts or managers or something I didn’t really catch. So I started chatting him up and asking him questions about life.

I know I’m naturally kind of a flirty person, but I didn’t think I was flirting with Cody. I must have seemed like I was though because Brady nudged me hard. I turned to him, shocked and ready to fight, and he mouthed, “Stop.”

So I stopped talking and made love to my nachos. It started to get really late and we were tired so we called an Uber to take us home. When we got inside, Brady and I got in bed and he said, “Love you, Reese,” and kissed me goodnight.

I started bawling. I have no idea why.

“What’s wrong?” Brady asked.

“Do you actually love me or are you just saying that?” I sobbed.

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it,” he replied.

“Are you sure?” I sniffled.

“Yes, I’m sure. Stop crying and go to sleep,” Brady said. I could tell he was getting annoyed with me so I hugged him and went to sleep.

So Thursday was a bit of a struggle because I was so hungover. I felt like shit and hid out until it was time for lunch. Then Luke and I walked to Chipotle and after I ate an entire burrito bowl plus chips and guac I was fine.

On Thursday night, I got drinks with Preston. He’s dating a new guy, Joe, so I haven’t seen much of him lately. And the whole time he only wanted to talk about Joe. I don’t think I am, but I really hope I’m not like that with Brady. And usually when Preston and I go out, we check out the hot guys and discuss, but even Preston didn’t want to do that. He bounced after only like an hour.

“Love you, doll, let’s do something soon,” he said, hugging me and then breezing out.

I felt like I had gotten ditched so I texted Preston letting him know. I probably could have found a nicer way to say it, but I said, “Preston, I know you’re really excited about your new boyfriend and I’m excited for you, but I felt like you kind of chose him over me tonight. You didn’t ask how my life is going and you only hung out with me for like an hour. We hardly ever spend any real time together anymore.”

He replied, “You’re being so dramatic. We see each other all the time. And I’m sorry that for once, everything wasn’t all about you, Reese. I know it’s hard to believe, but there is a world outside of your life.”

Whoa. I didn’t know what to say back so I didn’t say anything. Then Preston added, “Kendra says hi by the way. Says she hasn’t seen you since the wedding.”

The nerve! I’ve been giving Kendra space to enjoy married life, but I still talk to her almost everyday. I even told her that! I told her that I didn’t want to be needy so for her to let me know when she’s free. And so far she hasn’t been! I was so irritated.

Diana’s official last day was on Friday. Naturally, I cried the entire day. She called me into her office to talk after her going away party. I pulled myself together and walked in there.

“Since there isn’t a replacement for me quite yet, you are going to have a pick up a little more work. Dave thinks he can handle it by himself, but he can’t and I want you to step in and show him hard working and effective you can be,” she said.

“I will,” I assured her. “I planned on it anyway.”

“Of course. Dave wants to give you more responsibility and put you in a higher position, but he’s afraid you aren’t emotionally mature enough yet.”

Wait, what? I know I’m not the most mature person in the world, but I definitely thought I hid it well at work. So maybe Brady is right, maybe I need to take work more seriously. Especially since Diana is leaving and I may be getting a new boss soon.

On Saturday morning, I got up and made breakfast for everyone (avocado toast, turkey bacon, and fresh fruit). Lindsey walked in the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water while I was making the food. It looked like she was about to go for a run because she was in her workout clothes and shoes.

“Hey! I made breakfast whenever you get back,” I told her.

“I’m not hungry. Thanks though!” she said quickly and practically bolted out.

I didn’t think anything of it and went to get Brady. After we ate, Brady’s friend, Dan, brought his dog over so we could babysit for the day. I love when we dog sit. Especially because we don’t actually have to take care of him and can give him back after a day.

So I played with the little terrier (Charlie) for several hours. I took him for a long walk, took about sixteen videos for Snapchat, and fed him Cheezits. Charlie seemed to get tired of me and went and hid behind an armchair. We legit couldn’t find him for like two hours.

Brady and I got dressed up and went to dinner that night. I told him about the Preston situation and how upset I was about it. I hadn’t talked to Preston since and wasn’t sure if I wanted to.

“Maybe how you’re feeling is how your friends feel all the time,” Brady suggested.

I gasped. “There’s no way! I would never choose a guy over my friends. Not even you!”

Brady laughed. “Sure you wouldn’t, but maybe they don’t feel that. You have to think not only about what you’re doing and saying, but also how it’s perceived.”

I just stared at him.

“Speaking of which, Lindsey is kind of upset with you about how you were acting with that guy she works with.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, confused.

“Well, because you were flirting with him-”

“I was not!” I interjected.

“Okay. You were being friendly – Reese style. A little too friendly. Lindsey isn’t used to it and feels like it was inappropriate,” Brady explained. “Maybe you could apologize when you see her.”

“Apologize? I didn’t do anything wrong! If she feels like that then how come she won’t come talk to me about it?” I said.

“She’s afraid to. I explained your personality to her and she’s still really unhappy about it.”

So I felt really bad. I honestly wasn’t trying to flirt with Cody, I didn’t even find him attractive at all. But I still decided I was going to apologize to Lindsey and explain myself.

After dinner we stayed and had several drinks. We talked about going out afterwards, but ultimately figured we were too tired and just wanted to sleep. I called an Uber and we went outside to wait for him to pick us up. It was freezing and I watched him get lost on the Uber map several times. I finally called him and demanded to know what he was doing.

“Hi, is this Reese?” he answered.

“Yes, this is Reese. Where are you?” I asked.

He explained that he had taken a wrong turn and would be there in five minutes. The entire time we waited I complained about how dumb he was for getting lost and how cold I was until Brady finally said, “Okay, okay. I think he’s here.”

Sure enough the dark colored Kia stopped at the curb to pick us up.

“Where have you been?” I yelled as soon as I opened the door.

My driver apologized and explained his wrong turn again.

“Me and my boyfriend have frostbite now so thanks for that!” I continued.

“Reese,” Brady said, nudging me.

“What? I can hardly hear you because my ears are frozen off!” I yelled.

Neither of them said anything for a little while and I leaned on Brady’s shoulder, dozing off. When we arrived home, the driver apologized again and I said, “It’s fine, but don’t let it happen again! Bye!”

When we got inside Charlie was waiting for us by the door.

“Hi little guy! I missed you, did you miss me?” I said in my doggy/baby voice. I scooped him up in my arms and started kissing his head and to my shock and horror, he growled and bit me. Not hard enough to break skin, but still. I screamed and put him down.

“Reese, was that really necessary?” Brady asked.

“No! I didn’t even do anything, why would this animal bite me?” I screamed.

“No, I meant the way you treated our Uber driver. That was rude and incredibly embarrassing.”

“Oh my gosh, who cares? I need to get a rabies shot!”

Brady rolled his eyes and walked past me. I cried for approximately one minute then I realized that Charlie wanted to play. So I played with him for a little while until Lindsey walked in. She saw me and said hi then shuffled to her room without making eye contact.

“Lindsey hates me,” I announced, walking into the bedroom.

“Did you talk to her?” Brady asked.

“No, she’s literally avoiding me,” I said.

“Just corner her and apologize.” Brady said this like it was the most obvious solution in the world.

I didn’t respond because my phone vibrated. Andrew.

“I’m in Chicago this week and I need to see you,” he said.

“Why?” I replied, figuring it was something important or business related because it sounded so urgent.

“I miss you. I miss your smile and your humor. You were one of my best directors.”

“Oh, thanks.”

“Maybe we could get dinner, my treat. And we no longer work together so you don’t have to be afraid to come to my hotel room.”

And a few seconds later, he added, “I think about you all the time. And how wet you were for me.”

I gasped just as Brady asked, “Who are you texting?” I hadn’t realized it, but he had been talking to me the whole time, but I wasn’t responding.

Instinctively, I pulled my phone to my chest so Brady couldn’t see the screen. “No one.”

Brady gave me a weird look. I thought about coming clean and showing him, but it would only prove to him that guys just want sex with me.

So obviously I didn’t text Andrew back. I put my phone on do not disturb and then Brady and I fooled around and hooked up.

On Sunday, Brady and I went to church and then to brunch with Kendra and John. After what Preston said I felt guilty about it so I kind of invited ourselves along.

At brunch Kendra was like, “So how is it living together?”

Brady and I looked at each other.

“It’s weird right?” she went on.

“It’s definitely an adjustment,” Brady said.

“I lived with Reese for five months and it was like living with four toddlers and three pets,” Kendra said and everyone laughed. I glared at her.

After brunch, Brady and I walked home hand in hand being all cutesy.

“Babe, are we still getting married this winter?” I asked, out of nowhere.

He looked at me like he had no idea what I was talking about at all.

“Remember we decided to get engaged over the summer and married in the winter? You didn’t propose, but we could still do it,” I explained.

Brady looked straight ahead and waited a few moments before saying, “Are you sure you want to marry me? You won’t be able to flirt with random guys or text inappropriately with your former boss.”

I turned and looked at him, stunned that he knew about Andrew. How did he find out? My phone is super password protected. I was super weirded out.

I didn’t see Lindsey again until Sunday night. She was in the kitchen making tea and I figured it was the perfect time to apologize.

“Hey girl,” I said.

She glanced at me over her shoulder and said, “Hey.”

“I owe you an apology. I was seriously not trying to flirt with Cody the other night and I feel terrible that you think I was. I’m not that kinda girl. I was just trying to help you out,” I said.

“Oh,” Lindsey said, sounding relieved almost. “It’s okay. I’m not mad.”

“K, good. I was worried you hated me.”

She turned around and faced me, but didn’t make eye contact. “Did you apologize to Brady too?”

I scrunched my nose up, confused. “No. Why?”

“Because acting like that with another man in front of your boyfriend is disrespectful…”

I stared at her.

“This isn’t just about me. Brady deserves an apology too.”

It hadn’t occurred to me that I needed to apologize to Brady too, but duh. He was even giving me little passive aggressive clues.

So I went and found Brady downstairs, watching football or something and working on his laptop. I pushed his laptop closed and got on his lap.

“Bae, be honest. Will you not get serious with me because I flirt with guys?” I asked.

“You’re living with me. How much more serious do you want to get right now, Reese?” he said.

“You know. I want to get a house and a dog and I want you to propose and plan our wedding. Then get married and have a kid in two to three years,” I said.

Brady leaned his head back on the couch. “That has nothing to do with you being flirty. I know how you are.”

“So what is it? Are you afraid of commitment?” I pressed on.

And to my surprise, Brady said, “Yes.”

I didn’t expect him to admit that. I mean obviously he’s afraid of commitment, but I can’t remember a time he’s flat out admitted it to me.

“Oh. Well I’m sorry for flirting with Cody and I’m sorry for wanting to be with you forever.”

“Reese,” he sighed. “Why do you always have to rock the boat? Can’t we just be happy with where we are?”

I started crying. I’m such a fucking pussy lately. Brady let me cry for a moment and then he wiped my tears.

“Do you want me to move out?” I asked.

“No.”

“Do you even like me?”

“Yes.”

“Why are you afraid of commitment? Are you afraid there’s someone better out there? Are you just having fun with me until your real soulmate comes along?”

“Reese, I don’t know!” Brady exclaimed. “I’ve never been in this situation. I don’t know what I’m doing and frankly, neither do you. I don’t want to fuck up.”

I hugged him. Even though he kind of yelled at me, he was obviously being truthful. Finally. And at least he didn’t want to fuck up our relationship. That means something, right?

He hugged me back and whispered, “Let’s not rush, okay? When it’s time, we’ll know.”

So I scheduled an appointment for us with Laura. I feel like we have a lot to talk to her about and I can’t wait until she tells us why Brady is afraid of commitment. It must be something to do with his parents. It has to be.