i think i’m in love.

I added Brady on Facebook on Sunday night and he accepted my request on Monday afternoon. I was so happy that I didn’t (really) have any work to do because I needed to snoop through his page and find his ex-girlfriend. I knew it was kind of a long shot since they broke up two years ago but there had to be some trace of her.

I quickly discovered that Brady doesn’t often use Facebook so I wasn’t missing much. I looked through his tagged photos and couldn’t help smiling as I saw him go through life backwards. It was like Benjamin Button. I looked through pictures of him with Chris, him with some of their other friends, him in Guatemala, etc. Then there was a photo of Brady and a girl with the caption “the happy couple!” So this was her. The photo was from April 2012 so the time frame was exactly right. I was so excited for my find.

They were at a baseball game and Brady looked adorable and young in the photo with his glasses on. The girl was named Anna and she had a long European last name. I’ll admit, she was really pretty. Her long brown bob worked perfect with her heart shaped face and she had the most endearingly deep dimples. She looked like a combination of Emmy Rossum and that fashion blogger Olivia Palermo – not a bombshell, but undeniably gorgeous nonetheless. 

I clicked on her page to find out more. Of course, her page was completely private and I couldn’t click on anything. It did say that she currently lives in New York City, she’s from Boston, Massachusetts and she studied biomedical engineering at Harvard. Of fucking course. I totally felt like Elle in a Legally Blonde. What did Brady want with me? This girl has so much more than I ever will. I do think I’m a great catch, but not for someone like Brady.

I asked Kendra to come to my apartment after work so I could show her Anna.

“She’s cute,” Kendra said.

“I know. And she went to Harvard. Why is Brady even talking to me? I studied marketing at ASU.”

“I’m sure that’s not all he cares about. She may have went to Harvard, but she was probably boring and sucked in bed. That’s probably why they broke up.”

“They broke up because she moved away.”

“And now he wants to move on with you. Reese, he’s talking to you for a reason. If he cared that you’re not a doctor and didn’t go to an Ivy League school, he wouldn’t be continuing to hang out with you.”

In some ways I do think Kendra is right, but at some point I’m not going to be able to fake it any longer. How am we ever going to sustain a relationship if I need a dictionary every time we talk?

Brady texted me on Tuesday morning saying that he would be getting off work early at around six and did I want to get dinner? I said yes and he said he would get me at 6:30.

I spent the majority of the day in my office, but went to the bathroom right after lunch. To my dismay, Amanda was already in there. She and Whitney have been avoiding me for the most part which has been nice. I would rather not deal with them at all.

“Hey,” I said. Amanda was standing at the sink washing her hands and just stared at me in the mirror.

“Cool! Great talk!” I said sarcastically and slammed the stall door shut. What a bitch.

Brady and I went to a Mediterranean place and got really fancy and complex salads. We talked about the usual things: work, friends, family. I found out that he has an older brother who lives on the west coast and makes a great living as an astrophysicist or something really intense. What the fuck do their parents have in their DNA? I just don’t understand. 

I told him about Whitney and Amanda, without going into the BJ situation too much because I didn’t want him judging me. I would judge me.

“The bitches are just crazy,” I said at the conclusion of my story.

Brady took a swig of his beer. “I wouldn’t say they are crazy.”

“They fucking lied to Tracey from HR right in front of my face!” I exclaimed, leaning close to him. I couldn’t believe he was taking their side. 

“But they only did so to protect their asses and make you look bad. They both have some resentment toward you over matters they are obviously quite passionate about. It is completely normal that they’re behaving irrationally.”

I didn’t agree with what he was saying, but I couldn’t help smiling.

“It’s human nature, especially within the female populace. I wouldn’t dwell on it. They are going to get over it on their own time. Meanwhile, distance yourself significantly and don’t get invested. You will only make yourself look bad to the higher ups.”

Wait. Brady was totally right. I am one of the higher ups so why was I worried about the two of them? A tiger doesn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep. Whitney certainly looks like a sheep.

After dinner, Brady invited me over for a glass of wine. He has an extensive wine collection in it’s own little wine cellar. It’s so bad ass. Brady said he doesn’t use it often and I told him that it must be a great way to get girls to come home with him. I mean, I was impressed. There had to have been forty bottles of wine there and I didn’t even know where to start. I wanted a glass of each.

Brady laughed and said, “Yeah. If only.”

I didn’t know if that meant he had trouble getting girls to come home with him or if he just didn’t partake in one night stands and hookups. Both of them seemed like they could be true.

I chose a glass of vintage red and a glass of sparkling white because I couldn’t choose. We went to the back patio to drink. After I finished my two glasses I had to have one more. Then once that one was gone, Brady grabbed my hand and led me inside.

“Do you want to stay?” he asked. “I can take you home really early. I have to be at work at 7:00.”

I nodded.

We went to his room and started getting ready for bed. All the wine made me tipsy so I changed into a t-shirt without going in the bathroom or trying to be discreet. Oh well. Might as well let him enjoy the view since we wouldn’t be doing anything. 

He got in bed after me and I immediately started kissing him. We made out for a while, but then I knew I had to show some self control so I pulled away reluctantly. I caught a glimpse of his tattoo and pulled the blanket back to see it. It was on his pec, just below where his eagle ended, and it said, “starve the ego, feed the soul.”

“Why did you get this?” I asked, running a finger along the tattoo.

“When I was younger, I felt very entitled. I had everything I wanted at my fingertips, a seemingly infinite trust fund. I thought I deserved the world just because I could afford it. I was becoming materialistic and greedy. I didn’t like who I was becoming and I knew deep down that’s not who I was.”

Entitled? Deserved the world because I could afford it? Materialistic? This all sounded like me.

“So I made some drastic life changes. Sort of found myself, if you will. Realized that none of that shit mattered if I hated who I was.”

“Was it a hard transition?” I asked. 

“Absolutely. I lost a ton of friends. I was in a state of depression for months. For a while I thought I wanted to sell everything and move off the grid.” 

I just looked at him and he laughed.

“Luckily I came to my senses and finished pharmacy school. What I do now is gratifying. I think I’ve finally found a balance.”

His story made me start thinking about my life. I’m everything he was before, right? A materialistic, entitled little see you next Tuesday? But at least I’m happy. I think.

We fell asleep and Brady woke me up at some ungodly hour because he needed to leave for work.

“I don’t want to get up,” I whined “Just leave me here and I’ll call and tell them I’m sick.”

Brady laughed. “Don’t do that. You’re fine. Reserve your sick days for when you’re actually sick.”

I opened one eye and peeked at him. He was standing over me looking clean and hot in his dress clothes and glasses.

“Do you only wear those for work?” I asked. 

He adjusted his glasses. “Not necessarily. Just when I’m having a day when I don’t want to put my contacts in. It’s one of those days.”

I smiled and got up and dressed so I didn’t make Brady late for work. He dropped me off at my apartment and as I was getting out of the car, he grabbed my hand.

“Focus on your work today, not those girls. Okay?”

“Okay,” I said back.

He kissed me quickly and said, “You’re amazing, Reese.”

I didn’t know if that was a pep talk for today or a general observation, but either way I melted. 

You guys, I think I’m in love.

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date me then.

On Friday night, I texted all my friends letting them know that I’d had a long week and needed to drink. Kendra, John, Carly and I were going to a club that none of us had been to so I wanted to look hot/sexy/dtf/etc. I decided on a white bodycon dress with my hair down and wavy. Carly came over to pregame and by the time Kendra and John came to pick us up, Drunk Reese was ready to party.

When we got to the club, I immediately went to the bar and found a guy to take a tequila shot with me. Turns out he is a cop, a really effing hot one too. I hung out with him while Carly, Kendra and John danced. I can’t remember what we talked about, but somehow we are now friends on Facebook.

Carly came skipping over after a while.

“Reesie Cup!” she squealed, hugging me. “Chris and Brady are coming!”

“What? They’re coming here?”

“Yes, they’re on their way. They were at a bar nearby so I told them to come see us,” she explained. 

“Carly, I’m drunk as fuck. Brady can’t see me like this!” I exclaimed.

“You’re fine, babe. He won’t even notice.”

I turned to the bartender and ordered a water in the largest cup they had. I needed to sober up fast – I couldn’t let Brady see me in this state. The bartender slid me a glass of water and I downed it. I demanded another and downed it too. Then I ran to the bathroom and peed it all out. While I was in the bathroom I checked to make sure that I still looked like a bombshell and the bathroom attendant girl assured me that I did.

When I got back out there, Carly was screaming on the phone trying to explain to Chris where we were. She hung up and said, “They’re here.”

For the next thirty seconds I stood there trying to give myself a pep talk. I hadn’t seen Brady in almost two weeks and he ignored my text when I did try to reach out. So I wasn’t sure what to say.

Carly squealed loudly which alerted me that they had shown up. Brady walked in behind Chris looking sexy in a white short sleeved button down and nice jeans.

They both hugged Carly then Chris gave me a drunk hug and Brady followed suit.

“Hey, how are you?” Brady said then he lightly grabbed my waist and pulled me into a hug.

“Hi,” was all I could think to say. I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him back.

We pulled apart and he kept a hand on the small of my back. “How is your night going?”

“It is going extremely well,” I said slowly, so I didn’t fumble over my words. “How’s yours?”

“Same here. We just witnessed a bar fight. Crazy stuff.”

“Mmm,” was all I said. 

“What are you drinking?” 

We made our way to the bar and ordered Bud Lights and stood there drinking. He asked about my week and I vaguely told him about my trip to New York. I couldn’t let him know the details of my hot mess life yet.

Suddenly, Brady said, “You are really pretty.”

I was caught off guard, but said “Thank you” automatically.

“No really,” he went on. “You are beautiful. And you look especially beautiful tonight.”

I studied his face to see if I could read him since all of this was coming out of nowhere. I noticed that his eyelids were low and his eyes were bloodshot. Brady was hammered.

“Thank you,” I said again.

“You know, it is kind of intimidating,” he said, leaning on the bar. 

“What do you mean?”

“You’re pretty, you’re confident, you’re smart, you have a great career… Usually pretty girls are just pretty, but you have it all together.”

I have it all together? That was so far from the truth that it was hilarious. I was going to let him believe that though.

“Like, you’re the full package. I would love to date you, you know?”

“Date me then,” I said boldly.

“You’re only saying that because you’re drunk.”

Normally I get annoyed with insecure guys, but Brady made insecure look totally adorable. I wanted to hug him and rest his head on my boobs.

“No I’m not. Ask me on a date,” I said. 

He smiled. “Reese, will you go on a date with me?”

I couldn’t help smiling back. “Of course.”

He suggested dinner on Wednesday night and said he could pick me up after he got off work. I really hoped that he wasn’t just saying all this because he was drunk. 

Brady and I spent the rest of the night hanging out. We talked, drank, held hands, and danced. He even waited outside the bathroom while I talked to the attendant girl for fifteen minutes about how I was in love. I wondered if this was what having a real boyfriend was like.

After a while, we were all hungry and decided to get food. There was a food truck down the block so naturally that’s where we ended up. The guys stood in line to get the food while Kendra, Carly and I stood close by. 

“You guys,” I whispered loudly. “Brady and I are going on our first date on Wednesday. I think we’re actually a couple!”

“You’re a couple and you haven’t even been on a date yet?” Kendra smirked. 

“I know!” I whisper-yelled back. “Things are moving really quickly!”

I turned and looked longingly at Brady. He and John were having a conversation and laughing. My heart just swells for him in a way that I can’t explain.

They brought back tacos or something I wanted nothing to do with, and we all sat at the curb eating. Afterward, Kendra and John were ready to leave and offered to take me home. Carly was going home with Chris so the six of us split in half. Before we parted ways, Brady said, “I will see you on Wednesday.”

He kissed me on the cheek and we hugged before the three of them walked to the el stop. 

So now I think I have a dinner date on Wednesday. I’m actually kind of nervous. What should I do/not do/wear? 

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in your dreams, blow job.

I probably checked Brady’s Facebook sixty times between Monday and Wednesday to see if there were any changes, but either he didn’t log on or his privacy settings prevented me from seeing them. Stupid Facebook.

On Wednesday, Dave decided to let the entire office out at 3:00 PM so we could start enjoying the holiday early. It was super generous of him. As everyone started clearing out, I stayed in my office wrapping things up. The guy, Rob, from Monday sent me an email saying that he enjoyed meeting me and to contact him if I was ever in New York City so we could grab drinks. Then he left his personal cell phone number. It was kind of unprofessional, but I want this deal to work out so I replied that I would do so.

I began shutting down my computer and packing up my things when BJ walked in.

“Ready for the long weekend, boss lady?” he asked, leaning on the edge of my desk.

“Of course. I love any holiday that gives me an excuse to get shitfaced,” I replied.

BJ smirked. “Me too. What are you doing? Come out to the bars with me and my friends.”

This was the third time in the past two weeks he had asked me to hang out with him outside of work and each time I told him absolutely not. The kid is persistent.

“In your dreams, Blow Job,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“No, really. That’s my dream,” he said.

I raised an eyebrow. “What is?”

“You. Blow job,” he said in a low voice.

Suddenly it felt like the room got 100 degrees hotter.

“And that’s exactly where that will stay – in your dreams,” I said.

“I know, but that is within my rights as an American.”

I rolled my eyes and began toward the door.

“What?” BJ called after me. “I can’t help that you’re hot.”

I was almost out of the office when I turned and ran right into him. He was following me out too closely. We were chest to chest (or face to chest rather) and I had accidentally touched him in places I shouldn’t have in the scuffle. I quickly jumped away.

“What the fuck? Can I have some space?” I snapped.

BJ stared down at me – eyes blazing. “You can have whatever you want.”

I felt like I could hear my heart beating loudly in my ears. I hated that this little twenty one year old brat could have an affect on me.

“Bye, Brandon,” I said, gesturing toward the open door.

He didn’t take his eyes off me as he sidled out, way closer to me than necessary.

I wasn’t even to the L stop when I got a text from him: “Have an awesome weekend, Reese.” Just seeing his name on my screen did something to my body. Ugh.

I met Kendra and John for martinis and couldn’t wait to tell them about my fiancé.

“He sounds legit,” John said after I recapped Friday night. “That pharmacy school is very competitive. Awesome that he got in.”

“Isn’t it? He’s really smart,” I said.

“When are you guys hanging out again?” Kendra asked.

I failed to mention that Brady and I hadn’t exchanged numbers or made any plans of seeing each other again. I shrugged and took a sip of my martini. “Soon.”

“I’m really happy for Carly though. She deserves a good guy like Chris,” Kendra said.

I was a little annoyed that she changed the subject from me so abruptly, but I took that moment to check and make sure Brady hadn’t updated his Facebook. He hadn’t. But Carly sent me a text message that said, “Fourth of July BBQ at Chris and Brady’s. :-)”

I was already mentally picking out my outfit.

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need to make him fall in love with me.

I had a lunch meeting with some bigwigs from a flash sale website on Monday and we were going to discuss selling some of our previous lines on their website. It would be an amazing collaboration because not only would we be able to get rid of all the stuff that was just collecting dust but we would also gain a ton of publicity and new customers. They flew in from New York City just to meet me so I knew the meeting had to go well and I had to show them a good time.

I met the Vice President of sales, Martin, the senior marketing manager, Rob, and their executive assistant, Lena, at a steakery two blocks from the office. It was a little bit intimidating and I thought about taking someone along with me, but I wanted to do this on my own.

“So Reese, tell me more about your company. Tell me things I may not know,” Martin said, after we’d make our introductions, got seated and ordered a bottle of wine. He was a heavyset older gentleman who was already drenched in sweat. 

I swallowed, set my wine glass down and gathered my thoughts. 

“Our products are sold in over one hundred and seventy different retailers in twelve countries and we collaborate with artists and designers all over the world. Our latest is with a batiker from Indonesia who I discovered on Pinterest. We make it a point to only source materials from socially and environmentally responsible manufacturers, which is something our consumers love. Last quarter, our net sales were up twenty eight percent,” I said.

“If you guys are doing so well then why do you have a bunch of extra product to sell on our website?” Martin challenged. 

I smiled sweetly. “We don’t have a logistics team. We put all of our effort into product development so yes, we’re definitely lacking in that area.”

“So basically, you have a warehouse full of unsold product and you need to get rid of it,” Martin countered. 

I took another sip of wine. “That too. But mainly I just wanted to increase our online presence. Our websales aren’t where we would like them to be so I want us to explore other virtual avenues. Your company is so reputable that I thought it would be a fantastic place to start.”

“I like you,” Martin said, grinning. “You’re honest.”

I smiled. 

“Let me ask you this,” Rob said, leaning close to me from across the table. He was a thirty something DILF type who looked like he used a ton of high end hair products. “If we come to an agreement and go forward with this, how do you see our professional relationship continuing?” 

“I would love to work out something long term. Maybe quarterly. I know that our products are going to do very well with your client base.”

Two hours later, Martin and I were playfully arguing over who was going to pay the $650 bill. I thought my company should cover it since they’d traveled all the way from NYC but Martin insisted on paying it. Finally, we decided to split it. The meeting had gone really, really well and since their flight didn’t take off for another three hours, they decided to stop by the office and meet Dave and Diana. Nothing was official yet but Martin said that he would love to sit down and look at some numbers and see if we couldn’t get a deal figured out. 

After they left, Diana called me into her office.

“Reese, how did you pull this one off?” she asked. 

I shrugged. “A friend from college works in their sales department and put me in contact with Rob, who then put me in contact with Martin,” I explained. 

Diana nodded. “They seemed to love you. And if this works out, it could be really good for us. It would be a great partnership to have.”

I beamed. “It will definitely work out.”

After I left Diana’s office, I ran into BJ in the hallway.

“Where have you been all day? I missed you,” he said. 

“I had an important lunch meeting,” I told him as I walked into my office. 

He followed me in. “So that’s why those people were here. The girl was hot. She had a nice ass.” 

I shot him a dirty look. 

“Almost as nice as yours,” he added with a smirk.

I ignored him, but silently celebrated the fact that the squat challenge was obviously working. 

On my way home from work, I logged onto Facebook Mobile and saw that Carly and Chris had become friends. I immediately clicked on Chris’s profile. Brady doesn’t seem like the type of guy who uses Facebook, but it was worth a look. I clicked through a few of Chris’s profile pictures and found a group photo with Brady, who was looking just as ravishing as I remember. And alas, Brady was actually tagged. I couldn’t believe my luck. Not only could I go through his entire Facebook page, but I also had a full name for Google research purposes. 

First I went through all sixteen of his profile pictures. They were mostly group shots, but there was also one of him at what appeared to be his white coat ceremony and one of him with a German shepherd. So he’s social and into animals. Precious. I found out that he graduated from high school in 2006 and pharmacy school in 2012 so if my calculations are correct that means he’s only two years older than me. His relationship status said single and there were no random girls commenting on his photos (except a girl named Angelina who said “Looking good buddy!”). So it looks like I don’t have any competition.

When I got home, I opened up his profile on my laptop so I could stalk on a larger platform. I mostly just went through his profile pictures over and over because they were the only ones I could see with his privacy settings.

Next, I Googled his name and found his LinkedIn profile and numerous newspaper articles from sports in high school and his PharmD. graduation announcements. I also read about his parents who are like a power couple in Massachusetts. There was an article about a dinner party they had on a yacht in the Hamptons which is seriously P. Diddy level cool. The conclusion I’ve come to is that Brady and I are getting married, I just need to make him fall in love with me.

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