dick sucking culprit.

I planned on staying in for the entire weekend so on Friday night I had Kendra over for movies and wine. A chill night was definitely needed and we just reminisced about the debauchery that was college.

On Saturday, I went shopping with Preston and Dillon in the afternoon. I didn’t really need anything, but I told them I would tag along for moral support. I ended up getting a multipurpose bag and a skirt.

That night Carly wanted to go out. I dragged my feet until 10:00 and then decided that fine, I would go out, but only for two hours.

We ended up at a bar not far from my apartment. The whole gang was there – Kendra, Carly, Preston, and me and Carly bought us a round of tequila shots. It was actually kind of nice to be out without the boys like old times. I feel like lately, Brady, Chris and John are omnipresent.

Carly and I ended up getting drunk before we even left the first bar because some things never change. We left the bar and went outside to find the next place to go. Directly across the street was a club/lounge and next door was another bar. I remember Jessica posting something on Facebook about going to the club/lounge for her friend’s birthday and since I was drunk, I thought it would be a good idea to go there. We weren’t really dressed to go to a club, but I had never talked to Jessica without Brady around and I wanted to. What were the chances of us being in the same vicinity at the same time? Like I said, I don’t believe in coincidences. It was meant to be.

I suggested we go across the street without telling any of them why and Kendra scrunched her nose. “No. Let’s just go to the bar.”

I grabbed Carly’s hand and ran into the street (in front of a cab who honked at us) and Kendra and Preston had no choice but follow. The place was huge and kind of empty and there were two floors, three separate bars and couches everywhere. The last time I was there, one of my friends had to be carried out by security because she blacked out. Good times.

We ran to one of the bars and ordered drinks. It was a whiskey bar which was annoying, but I got a whiskey sour. We took our drinks to the dance floor and danced to old ass 90’s music. I was on the lookout for Jessie and couldn’t wait to confront her. The place was really dark so I couldn’t really see anything so I decided to just drink and have fun instead.

Carly and I went to another bar and got some kind of delicious cucumber lime cocktail. We took our drinks to a couch and sat down to check our phones. Brady was keeping me in the loop about everything he was doing and I appreciated that. I made one of the guys sitting on the couch across from us take a picture of me and Carly to send to Brady. After that, we started talking to four kind of cute finance guys for a while. I made sure to talk about my boyfriend a lot since Carly thinks I’m a flirt.

We met back up with Kendra and Preston and decided to make our way to the next place since this place was dead. I had kind of forgotten about Jessica as we made our way outside. I almost squealed with delight when I saw her standing with the two door men and one of her bland friends. She was wearing a really tight dress and all I could think about was the fact that I have naked pictures of her saved in my phone.

“Oh my gosh, hi Jessica!” I said loudly because she hadn’t seen me yet. I also wanted to subtly let my friends know that this was the dick sucking culprit who had a thing for my boyfriend. None of them had met her or knew what she looked like except Kendra because I obviously showed Jessica’s nudes to her.

Jessica looked really taken aback to see me and took a look at my plaid shirt, jeans, and riding boots (told you we weren’t dressed for a club) before breaking into a huge smile.

“Hey Reese! How are you?” She pulled me into a really fake hug which I found offensive. I patted her back lightly in lieu of a hug. “You’re not in San Francisco with Brady?”

How did that bitch know where my boyfriend was?

“Uh, no, I don’t give a fuck about a baseball game. These are my friends, Carly, Kendra and Preston.”

Carly and Kendra shook Jessica’s hand and then Preston said, “How do you two know each other?”

“She works with Brady,” I informed him even though he obviously already knew.

“Oh. Ohhh. Nice to meet you, Jessica,” Preston said, shaking her hand.

“Wow so I can’t believe you didn’t want to go to the World Series,” Jessica said, smiling like a psychopath.

I guess I technically wasn’t invited and maybe she knew that and was throwing shade in my direction. I ignored her comment. I wanted to stay and interrogate her, but I also wanted her to know that I didn’t have time to waste talking to her so I said, “Well, we’re going to go inside to have fun somewhere. Bye!”

“Okay. See you around,” Jessica said in an almost sneaky kind of way.

“She’s definitely not as cute as you. She probably just gives really great head,” Preston said as we crossed the street.

I whacked his arm. “Preston!”

I know it wasn’t really the time since everyone was around, but I think Jessica should apologize to me. She knows that I don’t want her talking to Brady yet she continues being thirsty and throwing herself all over him.

After we hit up two or three more places, we headed back to Kendra’s to crash. As I was getting ready to fall asleep, I got a text from Brady that said, “We are going to another bar. I love you.”

I fell asleep before I could respond, but I was so excited when I read the message on Sunday morning. I’m sure he only said it because he was drunk, but I love that I have him saying he loves me in writing.

Spoiler alert: I didn’t see Brady last night so I didn’t make him dinner or anything, but maybe tonight or tomorrow night. Besides dinner, what other cute, not super sappy things can I do? I’ve cooked for him already and I’m not the Pioneer Woman anyway so I want to do something else.

i’m much more classy now.

On Monday I decided that I was sick of dreading going to work so I was going to take my life back. If they wanted to go through with Whitney’s bullshit ideas then fine, that’s what we would do. One part of me wanted to stay out of it completely so that when it all blew up in her face I could say I had nothing to do with it, but another part of me genuinely cares about the company and doesn’t want Whitney to run in to the ground.

I decided that I would help, but also work on my own projects. I cannot possibly put my all into something someone else was going to put their name on.

On Monday afternoon I got an email from Mark that said, “It was so nice meeting you over the weekend. I would love to assist you in finding your first home. Let’s meet for coffee this week and discuss what you’re looking for.”

I totally forgot that I told Mark I wanted to buy a house. I replied, “Thanks for contacting me. I don’t plan on buying right now or in the near future, but I’ll let you know when I’m ready. And I don’t drink coffee, sorry.”

“You know, it normally takes people several months to find the perfect place. Let’s just meet. We can grab a quick drink since you don’t like coffee,” he replied.

“Fine. I’m free tomorrow after 5:00. And I’ll get a chai latte instead of coffee.”

For the rest of the work day, I planned a preview party for the night before the holiday warehouse sale. It would be held in the showroom and we would cater finger foods like bacon wrapped shrimp. Plus a lot of alcohol obviously. I was so excited to have my own little project to work on.

After work I met with Carly for mani/pedis so we could discuss the weekend’s events.

“I know you’re not really into weed, but you had fun right?” Carly asked.

“I did, but I ate five fucking slices of pizza in one sitting. That’s unacceptable and quite frankly disgusting. If that’s what weed is going to do to me then I want no parts,” I answered.

Carly giggled. “Then you don’t even want to know how many slices I ate. Thanks for the pizza, by the way. You were the life of the party!”

“Great. I’ll put that down as an explanation on my expense report.”

We finished our pedicures and headed to the manicure stations.

“Call me naive, but I didn’t even know Brady smoked or anything,” I said.

“You’re naive. Brady smokes with us all time,” Carly revealed.

Cool. So my boyfriend is a stoner and I had no idea. I guess I should’ve known though. Everyone smokes these days.

I started to say something, but the petite Asian girl doing my nails said, “You need manicure bad.”

I just blinked at her so she added, “Real bad.”

Then she started giggling. Isn’t that rude? Did y’all see that episode of Sex and the City where Miranda always orders the same Chinese takeout and the girl laughs at her? That’s how I felt. And honestly, I know it’s been awhile since my last mani, but my nails weren’t that bad.

I made sure to hunt down the manager of the nail salon to let him know how rude his staff is. I found him and told him what happened and he said I did “need manicure.” So whatever. Won’t be going back there.

Brady came over after work and I told him about his persistent friend contacting me.

“It won’t hurt to look. You might actually find something really great,” Brady said.

Fine. So I met Mark after work on Tuesday at a coffee shop near the office. He already had a chai latte waiting for me, which was nice but wasn’t going to make me any more inclined to buy a house/condo.

“Thanks for meeting me, Reese. How was your day?” he asked after he shook my hand.

“It was fine,” I said shortly. I was ready to get this little meeting over with so I could go home and watch the episodes of Snapped I had on DVR.

“That’s what I like to hear. What is it you do for a living again?” Mark asked.

I gave him a super brief summary of my job while he nodded.

“What an interesting industry to work in. I’m willing to guess your apartment is designed very nicely.”

That was true and I even had pictures to prove it, but I didn’t have time to show off. I nodded.

“Why the resistance, Reese? Buying a home is such an exciting thing that not everyone gets the opportunity to do.”

I took a sip of my chai. “I’m just not ready to buy right now. I probably can’t even afford what I want so I don’t want to get my hopes up,” I explained.

Mark’s face lit up. “You’d be surprised what you can afford at the same amount or less than what you’re paying in rent now. A unit in this building just went on the market last week. Why don’t we go take a look?”

The coffee shop we were in was actually in the lobby of an older apartment building with dark original wood, an ornate tray ceiling and lots of moldings. It was gorgeous. He took me up a rickety flight of stairs to the fourth floor and down the hall to the last unit. When he opened the door, my jaw literally dropped.

Even though the building was older, the inside of the apartment was completely redone. It had the same dark wood floor from downstairs and huge windows on two of the walls because it was a corner unit. The kitchen opened up the living area and was completely updated with dark cabinets, light granite counter tops, a sparkly dark blue back splash and stainless steel applicances. The bathroom had the same cabinets and counter tops with a separate glassed-in shower and jetted bathtub. Down the hall was the one bedroom, not huge but a good size for how old the building was. There was somehow a walkin closet with a customized built in shelving system. The entire place was beautiful.

“Wouldn’t you like to live here?” Mark asked. He hadn’t said anything the whole time I toured, letting me take the whole place in by myself.

“Yes,” I admitted. The place was way bigger and just as nice as my current apartment. “But how do I even know if I can afford it?”

“My clients usually work with an amazing banker who can crunch some numbers and find a budget you’re comfortable with. Why don’t you meet with her this week?” Mark suggested.

I said okay and looked around one last time. So now Mark has me seriously considering buying a condo. I mean, if my financial situation works out.

Brady came to get me after work so we could have dinner and drinks. He said he had a long day so I made him spill it over tequila spritzers. He explained that one of the long term patients at the hospital passed away. The man had cancer and wasn’t a patient Brady worked directly with, but they had grown close from seeing each other and talking everyday. I never know what to say when someone dies. I’ve never really had to go through that so I don’t even know what I would want someone to say to me.

Brady asked how my day was and I told him about meeting Mark and the awesome apartment I saw.

“I think you should definitely consider investing in property now. It’s the perfect time in your life,” he said.

I told him that I would look further into it.

We had a few more drinks and I started feeling pretty tipsy. Brady stopped after drink number two because he was driving, but obviously I kept going well past that. By the time we left the restaurant, I was feeling happy and horny as hell.

While Brady drove home, I rubbed his thigh and kissed his neck hoping he would pull over so we could partake in some skanky car sex. He wasn’t very responsive since he was focused on the road, but then Drunk Reese got a wonderful idea.

I quickly unbuckled his belt and pants before he could safely stop me and pulled his penis out. He was hard so obviously he wanted some action too. I was going to give him road head. I haven’t done that since probably high school because I’m much more classy now, but this was the perfect opportunity.

“Reese,” Brady moaned once I got started, but he didn’t stop me.

I kept going and he grabbed a fistful of my hair like he was going to pull me off, but he let me keep sucking. After several minutes, I felt Brady’s body start to tense.

“I’m…gonna…” he started but couldn’t even finish his sentence before he came.

The rest of the car ride back to his place was silent and when we got to his room he pushed me back on the bed and started kissing me. He pulled my shirt over my head and started kissing my neck.

“What are you doing to me?” Brady mumbled into my neck.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he responded so I don’t know what he meant by that.

Either way, we spent the night hooking up so no complaints from me.

no more jessicas.

On Monday morning I woke up much earlier than usual, went for a run, got ready for work, and stopped and got donuts for the whole office. I ended up getting four dozen and couldn’t carry them all so I made one of the workers carry it to the office for me (before you call me a lazy brat, just know that I gave him a generous tip).

I immediately started working away until around 1:30 then decided to take a break and grab something to eat. I found my phone at the bottom of my bag where I’d left it that morning and was surprised to see a new text message from Brady. It said, “Do you want to talk?”

I let out a happy sigh. Finally. Of course I wanted to talk. I sat there drafting about a thousand different responses before ultimately deciding on, “Okay.”

I waited to see what Brady would say back for ten minutes then threw my phone in my bag and headed out to lunch.

I continued working all afternoon and didn’t hear from Brady again until around 4:00. He said, “Do you want to meet for dinner?”

I said, “Okay,” again.

He responded back with the name of a place near my apartment and suggested we meet at 7:30. I typed, “Okay,” one last time. He gave no indication about what he wanted to talk about – whether he wanted to work our issues out or end things in person – which concerned me. In an ideal world, we would meet up, he would apologize profusely about not telling me about Jessica, he would beg for my forgiveness and then present me with a $12,000 designer bag.

I stayed at the office until 6:30 then went home and changed into a dress and booties. I didn’t plan well and ended up showing up to the place at 7:45. I pulled out my phone to text Brady that I had finally arrived, but I saw him sitting in a booth near the door. He stood up as I approached with an unreadable look on his face and kissed me lightly on the cheek. We both sat down.

“I already ordered. Do you want a beer or anything?” he asked, really properly.

I shook my head. Brady was acting like we didn’t even know each other which made me get defensive. He had no right to be mad. All I broke was his phone. He broke my heart.

“Okay,” he said.

We sat there for a minute not saying anything. Finally Brady said, “Reese, I’m sorry.”

I raised my eyebrows and nodded like “Go on.”

“I wasn’t completely open with you about Jessica. I should have been upfront and told you exactly what happened. That’s all I can say. I won’t make any excuses.”

I nodded in agreement.

“You have every right to be angry that I didn’t tell you and that you had to find out on your own. Seeing you that upset because of me was hard to watch. I apologize for that.”

“What’s the story with you and her?” I demanded.

Brady looked kind of surprised at my question. “Just everything I told you. We began working together a few months ago and she was quite persistent from the beginning. I’m very busy at work so I couldn’t pay attention to her and I think she took that as a challenge…”

“And she just randomly offered you a blow job and you accepted.”

He started to blush furiously. “I mean, yeah.”

“But y’all didn’t have sex?”

“No. I ended things before they could go that far.”

I glared at him for a few minutes.

“Um,” for the first time ever I saw Brady struggling with what to say. “I don’t want to throw everything away because of this. I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you.”

I uncrossed my arms as I started to soften.

“Yeah…” I began, unsure of what to say. Have I mentioned how much I hate talking about my feelings? “I don’t either.”

“You don’t what?”

“Want to throw everything away.”

He looked relieved. “I’m glad we are on the same page.”

I smiled and nodded.

“Those two days I gave you to cool off made me realize how much I really do like you.”

I waited a full minute before saying, “Me too,” really quietly.

“So I would like to make this work. If you want to.”

“What is ‘this?'” I asked.

“Us. Our relationship.” Brady looked confused.

“We never defined our relationship. Except the night when Jessica confronted you about it which doesn’t even really count,” I said in an accusatory voice.

Brady was unfazed by what I said. “I mean, I introduced you to my parents. I told them you were my girlfriend…”

My heart jumped. “Oh.”

“Is that not what you want?”

“It is,” I said. I decided that I was going to have to stop playing coy and hiding my feelings. If I wanted this to work with Brady I had to be open too.

“Okay…”

“I’m not good with relationships,” I blurted out.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m just not. I’m stubborn and needy and possessive and I suck at expressing my feelings.”

“You’re expressing your feelings now,” Brady said.

I let out a deep breath. He was right – I was expressing myself and I had yet to spontaneously combust so maybe it was fine. I kept going.

“I may have some mild trust issues from my previous relationships and you can see how this doesn’t help.”

“That’s completely understandable. I’ve done nothing to give you any reason to trust me.”

Brady owning up to what he did seemed to make everything okay. Whenever my ex did something he wasn’t supposed to, he would reverse it and make it seem like it was somehow my fault.

“My ex-boyfriend kind of ruined me. Not that I was perfect from the beginning. But he did some really awful things,” I went on.

“I’m sorry,” Brady said, although I’m not sure what he was apologizing for. He looked at me kind of cautiously before asking, “What did he do?”

I didn’t expect Brady to ask for details so I had to take a moment to gather my thoughts. Normally, I would have blown his question off, but we were being honest and open. Plus I appreciated that he had the balls to ask.

“What didn’t he do?” I answered. “He had sex with other girls, made out with them in front of me at parties, told everyone on campus that I was a psycho.”

Just talking about it was making me grind my teeth. Why did I ever even put up with that shit? I was such a pathetic, needy little girl.

“Yikes,” Brady said. “Worse than I thought.”

I nodded. We were silent for a moment then Brady said, “I guess I’m not really the best with relationships either.”

“How come?” I wanted to know.

“I realized that my parents aren’t like normal parents. They’re very…cold and disconnected. I mean, you met them. They aren’t affectionate at all so I never got that growing up.”

I nodded. “I can see that…” So I’m the only one who thinks his mother is a cold, unwelcoming little woman.

“Yeah. They don’t talk to us about anything personal. We never got a sex talk or anything like that. They only wanted to know what colleges we got into and our GPAs and things of that nature. Even now, they rarely say ‘I love you.’ So I think that has affected the way I am in relationships.”

Wow. His parents rarely tell him they love him? I can’t imagine. My parents send me random text messages throughout the day telling me how much they love me. I felt for him.

After our food came, things went back to normal for the most part. He told me about his weekend and he confirmed that he and John went on some sort of golf date on Saturday. He said that his phone was a complete goner so he ended up having to pay to get a new one. It almost made me feel bad, but not really because it taught him a valuable life lesson.

After Brady paid for dinner, we walked outside. Since the place was so close to my apartment, I’d walked, but Brady asked me to walk to his car with him. It didn’t seem weird at the time, but now that I’m thinking about it, it was kind of an odd request.

We got to his car and he opened the passenger door like he wanted me to get in, but the seat was filled with dozens of red, pink, white and yellow roses. There had to be a hundred there.

“I didn’t want to bring them in the restaurant, but I got you these,” Brady explained.

“Aww,” I cooed looking at him. “That’s so sweet.” It wasn’t the designer bag I was hoping for, but I was grateful for the gesture.

He shrugged sheepishly and I couldn’t help reaching over and hugging his adorable ass. Brady offered to carry the huge bouquet to my apartment and my doorman, Frank, said, “Someone must have been in the doghouse.”

I giggled at him calling Brady out. When we got up to my apartment, Brady put the flowers down and we stood there looking at each other. I invited him to sit down.

“So are we okay?” Brady asked me.

“I think so,” I said, nodding then I narrowed my eyes at him. “But don’t fucking hang out with her anymore.”

“I won’t. I didn’t plan on it.”

“Don’t even talk to her. Don’t go to lunch with her. Delete her number.”

“Of course,” Brady said.

I realized that I hadn’t apologized or fully owned up to my part of the fight yet and I needed to to make things right.

“I’m sorry I broke your phone,” I said and surprisingly saying the word “sorry” didn’t kill me.

“Don’t worry about it,” Brady said.

I swallowed, preparing myself to drop the Derrick bomb. “By the way, you remember my friend, Derrick, right? From my birthday?”

Brady nodded.

“Well, in college we like, kind of hooked up, but it wasn’t really a big deal. It only happened once, but he confessed that he still likes me on my birthday,” I babbled.

Brady’s eyebrows shot up like he was surprised then he nodded slowly as if he was putting some puzzle pieces together and it was all making sense now.

“I guess I could have told you that a while ago,” I said.

“That would’ve been good to know.”

“Just like it would’ve been good to know about Jessie,” I said sweetly.

“Point taken.”

We sat in silence for a minute then Brady said, “So no more Derricks.”

And I said, “And no more Jessicas.”

We stayed up until almost 2:00 AM just talking and not having sex which I think we needed.

So everything is settled, I think.

Give me your thoughts.

maybe i am a bit of a tease.

I’m sort of a part of Brady’s routine now – he works for twelve hours, calls me when he gets off and we have a slumber party. We have it at my house or his, depending on how tired he is, but usually his place. I spent the night on Thursday and Friday and on Saturday morning, Brady woke up and brought me homemade breakfast in bed. It was only waffles and fruit, but still. How fucking sweet?

“Where’s my mimosa?” I couldn’t help asking as I shoveled fruit in my mouth.

“Coming right up,” he said and disappeared. He came back shortly with a glass of bubbly orange juice.

“I was kidding,” I said, but secretly I was really grateful for that mimosa.

When I was almost finished eating, Brady asked what I had planned for the day.

“I’m buying a car!” I said excitedly. I remembered that Kendra was supposed to pick me up at 10:30 so I texted her to tell her to pick me up from Brady’s.

“Really? What kind?” he asked.

“Something inexpensive. My dad thinks I should get a Honda or Nissan because apparently they last forever,” I explained.

“Good for you. Having your own car will definitely give you a sense of freedom.”

“Exactly.”

I got up and showered then Brady and I made out with me in just a towel for a while. Just when things started to get heated, my phone started ringing. It was Kendra – probably letting me know that she was waiting outside.

I reluctantly told Brady that I had to go and started getting ready while he watched me. I knew he was checking me out so I got dressed kind of slowly. Maybe I am a little bit of a tease.

“We’re probably going to go out and drink tonight if you want to come,” Brady said as I was leaving.

“Duh,” I replied.

“I don’t even know why I asked. I’ll see you later.”

We went out to the suburbs to a Nissan dealership and I test drove a brand new Altima and it was really nice. I started talking to the salesman and discovered that none of the Altimas they had in stock had exactly what I wanted (pearl white, charcoal leather interior, sunroof, etc) and they wouldn’t be getting the new model for another month or so.

“You mean to tell me that you can’t, like, call another Nissan dealership and see if they have it?” I argued. It made sense to me.

He explained that doing that would cost me more money and he was trying to help me save. Whatever. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. I told him to call around and find me the car. Kendra, Preston and I walked around while he made some phone calls and ended up right next door at a luxury car dealership.

The salesman approached us and asked what we were looking for and I told him what happened at Nissan. I described to him all the features I wanted and how they didn’t have it in stock.

“You know what, I believe we have what you’re looking for,” he said. He led us down a row of shiny BMWs and stopped in front of a beautiful black sporty looking car. He insisted I get in and drive it.

Long story short, I went home with a brand new BMW 4 Series coupe instead of the Altima. It turned out to be (only) $20,000 more than the Nissan so I paid half down then financed the rest. That way I have some money left over. The monthly payment is reasonable however they made me get insurance before I could take my new car home. Let’s just say my insurance payment could buy me an extra pair of designer shoes each month.

While I was signing my paperwork Kendra said, “Reese, this is not even what you came to buy.”

Preston rolled his eyes. “Yolo, Ken. You’re too fucking responsible sometimes.”

Preston and I got lunch then went to go look at outfit options for my birthday. We didn’t end up finding anything except a pair of Loubs. They were a little out of my price range given how much I’d spent on my car, but it’s my birthday so whatever.

My dad called twice, but I didn’t answer because I knew he would want to know what happened at the dealership. I don’t know how I’m going to tell him I got an almost $50,000 car.

Preston, Kendra and Carly came over to get ready for the night. We pregamed then took the el to the bars. I got a text on the way there from Derrick, asking what I would be doing that night and I let him know where we were headed. He didn’t respond right away so I figured he was probably out having fun with his friends.

Brady and Chris were already out so we met up with them at the bar. They were with their two friends, Dan and Jacob and Jacob’s girlfriend, Stacey.

Drunk Brady swept me up in his arms and kissed me then ordered us all shots. We moved down to the end of the bar and I told him all about my day. We talked drunkly for a while then Kendra dragged me to the bathroom.

Does anyone else always make a ton of friends in the bar bathroom? Kendra and I met some girls and we spent twenty minutes in there talking to them and taking pictures for Instagram.

On our way back to the bar, we passed the door just as Derrick and one of his friends walked in.

“Reese!” he called as if I hadn’t seen him.

“Oh my gosh, hi!” I waved.

He rushed over and pulled me into a hug and then suddenly noticed Kendra standing with me. “Wow, hey Kendra. It’s been a while, huh?”

She nodded and they hugged too. He introduced us to his friend from work. The four of us talked for a few minutes then Derrick suggested we go to the bar to get drinks.

“Oh gosh, yeah! Come on, meet my friends!” I exclaimed.

I led the group through the throng of people toward the bar. Derrick was on my heels trying to keep up with me and I heard him say, “Reese, you look gorgeous,” or something like that.

I thanked him quickly just as we reached the bar where everyone was hanging out.

“There you are,” Brady said to me, putting an arm around my shoulder. Then he kissed me on the cheek.

“This is my friend from college, Derrick,” I said introducing the two.

Derrick looked from Brady to me and back and seemed to be putting the clues together that we might have something going on.

Brady introduced himself then the two of them shook hands. He ordered shots for me, him and Derrick which I thought was very nice and polite. Brady and Derrick started talking and I danced over to Preston.

“Who is this little cutie you found?” he whispered in my ear.

“Derrick! I went to college with him!” I said back.

“Top or bottom?” Preston asked.

I swatted him playfully. “He’s not gay, Preston!”

“Hmm. Too bad.”

Derrick appeared behind me just then and I said hi.

“Do you remember when you guys used to make those SoCo lime cookies?” he asked, referring to something my old roommates and I used to do.

“Yeah,” I said back, smiling. “I forgot how to make those now.”

“We had some good times, right?” Derrick put his hand on the bar behind me and leaning close. Wait. Was it not obvious that Brady and I are a thing? Why was Derrick still trying this?

“My birthday is next weekend. We’re going to dinner and drinking and you’re welcome to come,” I blurted out.

“Is what’s-his-name going to be there?” Derrick asked, jabbing his thumb in the general direction of where Brady and Chris were standing on the other side of the bar.

“Well duh. He’s like my boyfriend,” I said. Surprisingly I didn’t choke on the word “boyfriend” so maybe it is real.

Derrick looked crushed. “Really? You have a boyfriend?”

I nodded. “Is that hard to believe?”

“I mean, I don’t know. You spent your entire college career chasing a guy who didn’t want you.”

Even though I knew it was kind of true, his words stung.

“This isn’t one of those situations again is it?” he contined on.

I blinked back what felt like tears. “Uh, no. I told you that I’m more mature now. I’ve learned from that.”

“Okay. It just sucks seeing you go after these idiot guys when I know you deserve better.”

“Brady is not an idiot,” I said through clenched teeth.

“Maybe he’s not, but you have to admit you’re not the best at picking guys, right? Have you ever had a relationship that worked?”

I didn’t say anything.

“No. Because you’re going after the wrong guys. And not looking at what’s in front of you.”

Suddenly, I was enraged. “For your fucking information, I go after really great guys. Maybe I’m the one who can’t commit. Have you ever thought of that?”

Derrick started to say something, but I cut him off.

“No you haven’t! Because you’re just so concerned with the fact that I’m not interested in you!” I was getting louder.

“Maybe I am. But you haven’t even given me a chance…”

“Yes I have. Did you forget the night we got drunk and you spent the night and you couldn’t get it up?”

Color rose up Derrick’s neck. “I was drunk.”

“Drunk? Or impotent?” I said really loudly. Kendra saw what was unfolding and came to stand next to me.

“Whoa, you’re taking it too far,” Derrick said, putting his hands up defensively.

“You started this!” I practically screamed. Kendra grabbed my arm and tried to pull me away.

“I didn’t start anything, Reese. You just flipped out for no reason.”

“Fuck you!” I said, poking him in between his eyes.

Kendra physically dragged me away and took me to the bathroom. Drunk Reese immediately collapsed on the nasty ass bathroom floor and burst into tears.

“Reese,” Kendra said, exasperated. “Get up.”

“Honestly, Kendra. Derrick and I were so close in college,” I sobbed.

“I know.”

“Did you even hear what he said to me? He’s so fucking mean!”

Kendra didn’t say anything and I continued to sit there crying.

“Reese,” she said finally. “Get the fuck up.”

She pulled me to my feet by my armpits. I sulked to the mirror and checked my makeup to make sure I looked okay even though I was ready to leave. My night was ruined. When we walked out of the bathroom, Brady was standing there waiting.

“Are you okay?” he asked, looking concerned.

I couldn’t help throwing my arms around him. “I want to leave!”

“Okay. We can leave,” Brady said.

He and Kendra went back to the bar so he could pay the tab and I waited by the door. I didn’t even say goodbye to my friends because I didn’t want to risk seeing Derrick again. Brady came back and we took a cab home.

Back at the duplex, Brady and I went to his room and I immediately got undressed.

“Sure you’re okay?” Brady asked as he took off his shirt.

I was sitting on the edge of the bed in just my underwear. “I’m great.”

He walked toward me and I got up and pushed him back on the bed. I climbed on him and started kissing him until I could feel that he was getting excited. Then I went down and hastily unbuckled his jeans and pulled them down. I immediately started blowing him and he was obviously pleasantly surprised by how quickly things were moving. Brady was moaning “Oh my God” and gripping the sheets around us hard.

I got up and started to climb on top of him, but he said, “Wait.”

My panties were already off and I had full intention on hopping right on his dick and riding him into the sunset. What could he possibly want me to wait for? “Huh?”

“I don’t…have anything,” he said.

It took me a second to comprehend that “anything” meant condoms. How had we used them all? It wasn’t until later when I was completely sober that I started doing some math. We’d had sex four times total and Trojan makes three count boxes and ten count boxes, but not four. So there were at least six condoms that were unaccounted for. Who had Brady been having sex with?! Furthermore, why wouldn’t he think to get more before I came over?

“It’s okay, I’m on the pill,” I said quickly and started riding him before he could object. I didn’t add that sometimes I forget to take it.

Brady didn’t even bother trying to keep his eyes open and let me keep going until he was about to come then he pulled me off. If I’m already on birth control, what is pulling out going to help? I mean, not to be naive/gross.

And by the way, Derrick hasn’t even reached out to me since last night so that just shows how much he really cares.

it was so beautiful i thought i would cry.

Diana called me into her office on Wednesday afternoon. She wanted to talk about some of the projects I’ve been working on and discuss the bonuses I would be receiving.

“I’m really happy with the way you handled things with Martin and his team. I would like to reward you with an initial bonus, not including the additional bonus you’ll get from sales,” Diana said.

“Okay,” I replied, hoping my eyes hadn’t turned into dollar signs.

She told me what I would be receiving from the flash sale website deal and the sales from the batik bohemian line and I couldn’t even stop myself from grinning. The total of the two was almost half my yearly salary. I could buy an entire new designer fall wardrobe. I could get a Birkin bag.

But then I started thinking rationally. I could get a nice, new modest little car. That’s what I decided I would do. It was definitely overdue. Plus I’m sick of relying on friends and the CTA to get places. My decision was validated when I left the office to go meet Kendra for happy hour and got hit on four times while walking to and from the L stop. Can’t a girl walk in peace?

“So you finally did it,” Kendra said as soon as I sat down. She didn’t even say hi or ask how I was.

“Yes. I think I’ve waited long enough,” I replied, scanning the menu. I didn’t make eye contact so I couldn’t see what disapproving face she was giving me.

“Well at least he’s your boyfriend now,” she said.

I almost choked and looked up at her. And then I remembered what Brady said on Saturday. I completely forgot about that. Suddenly I didn’t want to talk about myself anymore (can you even believe that?!).

“How’s John?” I asked.

“He’s well. He’s taking me to Lake Geneva next weekend for a little getaway.”

“What if he proposes?” I asked. That’s immediately what I thought of when she said getaway.

She waved that idea away. “He’s not. That won’t happen for another year or two.”

We finished our drinks and I went home and started researching cars. I called my dad for help and he told me that the Nissan Altima is a wonderful car and started emailing me pictures and links comparing it to Hondas and Toyotas. I decided the coupe would be most suitable for my lifestyle and I would get the classic pearl white with charcoal leather interior.

I texted Kendra and Preston telling them to clear their schedules Saturday morning so they could go with me to look at cars. I am so excited!

Brady swung by and got me on his way home from work. When we got to his place we went directly to his room because it was already close to 10:00. Everything felt very normal between us – Brady was using words I didn’t understand and speaking in complete sentences – so I’m glad sex hasn’t changed anything. Yet. Brady went to shower and I changed and waited in bed.

Derrick texted me saying, “Dinner tomorrow?”

We’d been texting the past few days, but this was his first attempt at hanging out again. I can’t remember if Derrick was super flirty in college, but he sure is now. And since I think I kind of have a boyfriend, I knew I needed to draw the line.

“Sorry, busy,” I replied.

“Damn. Friday then?”

I didn’t get a chance to respond because Brady came out of the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around his waist. He walked to his dresser to get clothes to put on and I couldn’t help watching and drooling the entire time. Clearly he was doing it on purpose. He went back in the bathroom and changed then came back out, turned off the light and joined me in the bed.

We started kissing and Brady took off my shirt. He’s normally so proper and tightly wound, but now when we’re intimate he’s so smooth. He’s obviously comfortable with me now. If he wasn’t Brady, I would think he was some sort of suave player who’s been with a ton of girls. But I know that can’t be true.

I decided that Brady deserved a life changing blow job. I climbed on top of him, kissed his neck, then started working my way down his body. I reached his black shorts and stuck my fingers in the waistband and pulled them down. Before, I didn’t get a chance to fully see his penis because my eyes were closed. But as soon as I pulled his shorts down, his boner sprung out at me. With the light coming in his large window, I could see the whole thing – it was statuesque and so much larger than I expected from Brady. It was so beautiful and perfect I thought I was going to cry. Even his pubes were tame and shaped.

I took the whole thing in my mouth and started sucking and Brady let out the most adorable little moan. I love having the power to do that to guys. I continued until I felt his body tense up and I could tell he was about to come. I abruptly got up and finished taking my clothes off.

I looked at Brady and he was looking up at me, pained. I climbed back on top of him and when he realized what I was doing he hastily reached into his nightstand and found a condom. He barely had a chance to put it on before I jumped on and started riding him. Brady grabbed my hips and held on.

His eyes were half shut, but I at least appreciated that he was attempting to keep them open and maintain eye contact with me. Not just my body.

“Reese…” he said, breathlessly, and my name lingered on his lips like he was going to say something else.

I didn’t say anything back and kept going until I was on the brink of orgasm. I started crying out and Brady started forcefully bouncing me up and down on him harder. It’s the most aggressive I’ve seen him ever. And it was so hot. I came and he kept bouncing me until he was done.

I was exhausted. I climbed off and Brady immediately pulled me close, snuggling me.

in your dreams, blow job.

I probably checked Brady’s Facebook sixty times between Monday and Wednesday to see if there were any changes, but either he didn’t log on or his privacy settings prevented me from seeing them. Stupid Facebook.

On Wednesday, Dave decided to let the entire office out at 3:00 PM so we could start enjoying the holiday early. It was super generous of him. As everyone started clearing out, I stayed in my office wrapping things up. The guy, Rob, from Monday sent me an email saying that he enjoyed meeting me and to contact him if I was ever in New York City so we could grab drinks. Then he left his personal cell phone number. It was kind of unprofessional, but I want this deal to work out so I replied that I would do so.

I began shutting down my computer and packing up my things when BJ walked in.

“Ready for the long weekend, boss lady?” he asked, leaning on the edge of my desk.

“Of course. I love any holiday that gives me an excuse to get shitfaced,” I replied.

BJ smirked. “Me too. What are you doing? Come out to the bars with me and my friends.”

This was the third time in the past two weeks he had asked me to hang out with him outside of work and each time I told him absolutely not. The kid is persistent.

“In your dreams, Blow Job,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“No, really. That’s my dream,” he said.

I raised an eyebrow. “What is?”

“You. Blow job,” he said in a low voice.

Suddenly it felt like the room got 100 degrees hotter.

“And that’s exactly where that will stay – in your dreams,” I said.

“I know, but that is within my rights as an American.”

I rolled my eyes and began toward the door.

“What?” BJ called after me. “I can’t help that you’re hot.”

I was almost out of the office when I turned and ran right into him. He was following me out too closely. We were chest to chest (or face to chest rather) and I had accidentally touched him in places I shouldn’t have in the scuffle. I quickly jumped away.

“What the fuck? Can I have some space?” I snapped.

BJ stared down at me – eyes blazing. “You can have whatever you want.”

I felt like I could hear my heart beating loudly in my ears. I hated that this little twenty one year old brat could have an affect on me.

“Bye, Brandon,” I said, gesturing toward the open door.

He didn’t take his eyes off me as he sidled out, way closer to me than necessary.

I wasn’t even to the L stop when I got a text from him: “Have an awesome weekend, Reese.” Just seeing his name on my screen did something to my body. Ugh.

I met Kendra and John for martinis and couldn’t wait to tell them about my fiancé.

“He sounds legit,” John said after I recapped Friday night. “That pharmacy school is very competitive. Awesome that he got in.”

“Isn’t it? He’s really smart,” I said.

“When are you guys hanging out again?” Kendra asked.

I failed to mention that Brady and I hadn’t exchanged numbers or made any plans of seeing each other again. I shrugged and took a sip of my martini. “Soon.”

“I’m really happy for Carly though. She deserves a good guy like Chris,” Kendra said.

I was a little annoyed that she changed the subject from me so abruptly, but I took that moment to check and make sure Brady hadn’t updated his Facebook. He hadn’t. But Carly sent me a text message that said, “Fourth of July BBQ at Chris and Brady’s. :-)”

I was already mentally picking out my outfit.

did i just get dumped?

I was supposed to facilitate in presenting the final specs from the Batik Bohemian collection along with the product development team for the Friday staff meeting so I spent the morning preparing. BJ brought my chai and sat in my desk chair watching me rehearse/undressing me with his eyes.

When I finished my second run through, BJ began a slow golf clap.

“I think you’ve got this under control, boss lady,” he said.

“Thanks, Blow Job!” I replied, giving a little bow.

BJ smirked. “You know, I can see the outline of your thong through your skirt.”

I turned back to my presentation board so he wouldn’t see me blushing. Aren’t thongs supposed to prevent panty lines? And I was wearing the most modest J. Crew pencil skirt – of course BJ had to turn it into something sexual. And I hate to admit it, but the comment gave me a feeling in my tummy that was not appropriate for work.

“Do you need any help from me?” he called when I didn’t respond.

“No,” I said, but he got up and starting walking toward me anyway.

“You sure?” he asked, smirking. BJ had on a light blue button down with the sleeves pushed up ever so casually and those fucking amazing slacks. I wanted to rip his clothes off.

“Actually,” I said, walking around him. “Why don’t you sort this stack of papers?

“Of course.” He took the papers from me and pulled up one of the upholstered side chairs to my desk so we were sitting across from each other.

I picked up my phone and saw that I had a text message from Eric. I was really surprised because I never expected to hear from him again.

It said, “Hey Reese. I’ve been doing some thinking and I think it would be best if we didn’t see each other anymore. You’re a ton of fun, but we are in different places in our lives. I have no hard feelings toward you and I wish you the best.”

What the fuck. Did I just get dumped? I totally knew we weren’t going to work out and I was okay with it, but the text confirming it just made me feel rejected. I read it over several times. Different places in our lives? What does that even mean?

“Everything okay?” BJ asked.

“I’m fine,” I said, looking up.

He smiled. “Well, yeah. I can see that.”

It felt nice to have some guy attention so I let him sit in my office for an hour telling me about his life in Georgia. He told me about his older brother who is getting married later this summer. BJ has had a secret crush on the fiancée ever since he saw her in a bikini when he was 16. He also told me about his parents, particularly his father who let BJ start drinking beer when he was 12. This sounded like bad parenting but he assured me that it was just a southern thing.

At 11:30, Amanda poked her head in my office.

“Hey Beej, ready for lunch?” she asked.

BJ gave me a wide eyed, frustrated look before saying, “Yeah, give me a minute.”

Amanda gave me a satisfied, if not, smug look. “Hey Reese.”

Lol okay. Whitney obviously rubbed off on her. I smiled as I took in my “competition.” Amanda is a Lily Pulitzer-and-pearl wearing sorority girl from New England. On paper, I’m sure she and BJ are perfect, but I can tell he’s too wild for her. She is adorable – with huge blue doe eyes, perfectly parted blonde hair and the most innocent round face – in a juvenile sort of way.

“Hi there,” I said.

“Okay, I’ll wait for you downstairs,” she said and was gone.

“She’s so clingy,” he rolled his eyes.

I smiled and waved him off. “Have fun!”

The meeting went swimmingly and afterward Dave took Diana, Tracey from HR, and me out for drinks. I just love drinking on someone else’s tab.

That evening, Preston came over and we ordered Chinese. We gossiped, watched tv, and vegged out on my couch. So successful Friday night, I’d say.

he might actually be done with me.

Eric still hadn’t called or texted me by the time Wednesday happy hour rolled around and I was becoming worried that he might actually be done with me. It had been an entire week since we’d last spoken and it was the longest we had gone without contact. I, of course, hadn’t reached out to him, but decided that once I got home from happy hour I would.

I met Kendra at the restaurant and considered just ordering the one dollar oysters because being a drunk mess is what got me in the position I was in in the first place. But I ended up ordering a glass of wine and a pomegranate martini anyway.

“How’s living with a man?” I asked immediately, so she wouldn’t start asking me questions about Eric.

“It’s wonderful. I can’t believe we didn’t do this before. It’s really helpful having him around. He cooks a lot!” she answered.

“Don’t you ever want some alone time?”

“John is at the hospital a lot so we have plenty of time away from each other. I get so excited when he comes home.”

It was dim in the restaurant but it looked like Kendra was kind of blushing. Gross.

“You sound like a puppy waiting for his owner to get home from work,” I said.

Kendra narrowed her eyes at me. “So how’s Eric? I haven’t heard about him in a while.”

I drained my glass of wine before answering. I considered lying and saying that Eric and I were great so Kendra didn’t scold me for potentially ruining things with yet another guy.

“I haven’t heard from him since last Wednesday morning,” I blurted out.

“Have you called him?” Kendra asked.

“Well, no,” I started.

“Why?”

“He always calls me. I never call him,” I said.

“Exactly. See where’s that’s gotten you?”

“I’ll call him later. I’m not even worried about it,” I said, sipping my martini.

Kendra started talking about work or something and my phone vibrated in my bag. I tried not to get excited thinking it was Eric because I knew it wasn’t. It turned out to be BJ, asking if I wanted a chai latte in the morning. BJ and I exchanged numbers on a strictly business basis, but he finds any reason to text me. And I hate to admit it, but I kind of like the attention.

I texted back, “Obviously.”

Immediately, BJ wrote back, “Anything for my favorite boss.”

I finished another glass of wine then we headed home. The alcohol had made me loosen up, but I was still a little bit nervous about calling Eric. I literally never called him – unless I was drunk.

I took a shower, blow dried my hair, brushed my teeth, flossed and then I called him.

I didn’t even have anything prepared to say, I expected us to just fall back into it when he answered. Except Eric didn’t pick up. I quickly hung up without leaving a message. At first I got mad, thinking he was ignoring me but then I realized that he said he was almost fully recovered from his injury. He was probably back at work, practicing and having games everyday. He was probably super busy. I decided to send him a quick text in case he wasn’t in a position to talk on the phone at the moment.

“Hey, just checking in. Miss you!”

Satisfied, I popped in a movie and fell asleep.

This morning I got to work and signed into my email and Pinterest and waited for my hot chai to be delivered to my office. BJ showed up right on time with my venti and a cake pop.

“I thought you might be a little hungry this morning,” he said, perching on the edge of my desk.

“Thanks, Blow Job, but I really don’t need these empty calories this early,” I said. I quickly Googled the calories in a Starbucks cake pop and was happy to see that it only contained 140.

“What do we have on the agenda today?” BJ asked as I took a bite out of my cake pop.

“We have a meeting with a freelance graphic designer and then you guys are going to start on a new campaign this afternoon. It should be a fairly easy day.” I took another bite of the cake pop and BJ watched my lips intently.

“I like the way you eat that,” he said, biting down on his lower lip.

I felt heat rising up my neck to my face. Dammit, Blow Job!

I took the last bite of the cake pop and sucked on the stick for longer than necessary. BJ looked like he was going to explode in his pants.

“Knock knock,” we heard at the door.

BJ jumped off the side of my desk as Whitney stepped into my office. “Hey Reese. I have some things for you to look over.”

Whitney dropped a file folder on my desk and looked from me to BJ and back.

“Okay. I’ll get to those this afternoon,” I told her, smiling sweetly.

“Awesome. Thanks, Reese!”

I followed Whitney to the door and watched as she walked out with BJ on her heels. Before he left, he tapped me lightly on the nose. He had no right to touch me so I slapped his hand away. He turned and smirked at me before going to his cubicle.

It wasn’t until this afternoon when I was reading through Whitney’s file, that I realized I never got a call or text back from Eric.

the intern.

On Monday morning we had a staff meeting to introduce our new bright eyed summer interns. I sat in the back of the conference room Instagramming my shoes (#shoesoftheday #rockstuds) because this had nothing to do with me. Afterwards, I met with Diana and Dave to discuss some details about the warehouse sale. They kept telling me how excited they were about the batik line and how they couldn’t wait to see what else I had in store.

Usually I work through lunch but I decided to go to the break room to make some tea and find a snack. I was standing in front of the vending machine trying to decide if I wanted an iced honey bun or a plain honey bun (honestly, I needed neither) when I heard someone say, “Just take forever why don’t you?”

I turned and standing behind me was one of the new ad team interns with a playful smirk on his face. He was tall and lean with dark hair that needed to be cut, sleepy eyes and an incredible jaw. He was wearing a pair of amazing fitting flat front slacks with a polo tucked in. Something about his look told me that he liked to drink cheap beer, smoke a ton of pot, and get crazy on the weekends. He was actually really effing hot.

“I’m still deciding. You can go ahead of me if you’d like,” I said.

He stepped in front of me and as if reading my mind, got an iced honey bun. He locked eyes with me as he took a bite.

“Mmmm. So good,” he said.

“That’s actually what I was going to get,” I told him.

He held the honey bun out to me. “Want a bite?”

I shook my head. “I’ll get my own.”

He was blocking the vending machine so we both just kind of stood there looking at each other.

“What’s your name?” he asked after taking another bite.

“Reese. What’s yours?” I replied.

“Brandon. But people call me BJ.”

“BJ,” I repeated.

“Yeah. Like blow job.”

Normally an inappropriate comment like this would warrant a scoff and an eye roll, but the way he said it – so suggestively – made my face get hot. And it really pissed me off.

“Do you know that I’m going to be your boss this summer, Brandon?” I finally revealed.

He gave me a skeptical look. “How old are you?”

“Old enough.”

Blow Job smirked at me again. “Anything I can get for you, boss lady? Coffee?”

“Non-fat, no foam, Stevia – extra hot chai tea latte topped with a sprinkle of nutmeg. I don’t drink coffee,” I countered.

“Oh yeah?” he said, smirking.

“You have six minutes,” I added.

BJ took a bite of his honey bun without taking his eyes off me.

“You’re out of your mind, Reese. This ain’t The Devil Wears Prada,” he said.

He was so cocky and douchey. Who gave him the right to talk to me – his boss – like this? I was kind of obsessed.

“Yes it is. You’re going to be my slave this summer, Brandon,” I said.

He finished his honey bun while staring me down. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

He stared at me carnivorously for a few moments before heading toward the door.

“I hope you’re not a psycho boss, Reese,” BJ said before walking out.

He has no idea.

After work I stopped by Kendra’s to say hi and to distract myself so I didn’t go home and text Eric. I’d decided that was going to give him a little bit of space. I knew he needed a break from me/my drunk counterpart so I was going to wait for him to contact me.

When I got to Kendra’s, John was there moving some of his things in. The place was in such disarray that it gave me anxiety. I told Kendra I had a lot of work to do a peaced out of there.

On Tuesday, I got to the office and immediately started replying to emails as usual. I usually spend an hour or so catching up on what I missed/raping Pinterest then I get started on my day. I heard a knock on the door and found BJ standing there with a white Starbucks cup in his hand.

“Morning, boss lady,” he said, walking to my desk. He sat the cup down and I quickly closed out of my Pinterest browser. “I brought your drink.”

I looked up at him, unsure of what to say. He had that playful smirk on his face. It told me that he was imagining what I looked with my clothes off and it made me blush. I never fucking blush.

“This is about twenty hours late,” I finally said.

“Sorry about that. It won’t happen again,” BJ said.

He stayed in my office for a while chatting. I found out that he goes to school at UGA and is in a fraternity, which is obvious. He is studying marketing and advertising – hence the internship and is living with a bunch of his friends in the city this summer. One thing about BJ is that he definitely knows how to talk to women. He says everything so sexually – like he was asking my favorite sex positions and if I wanted to try them out with him. I couldn’t decide if I loved him or hated him.

After he left, I took a sip of the steaming hot chai goodness. I even tasted the hint of nutmeg. Somehow, this goofy kid had gotten my order exactly right. I was impressed.

I spent the day prepping for the warehouse sale on Saturday, keeping the ad team in check and avoiding hungry looks from BJ. After work, Eric called and invited me to sleep over. I can’t lie, I was relieved to finally hear from him. I packed my bag and changed into lululemon leggings and a v-neck. When we got to his condo, we made pasta for dinner and put in a movie. We didn’t mention Friday night at all.

Eventually, we retreated to his bed. We laid next to each other, on our backs, not saying anything or touching. It was weird and I wondered if Eric was still mad. But he’d invited me over and kissed me hello so that didn’t seen likely. I peeked over at him and he had one hand behind his head and he appeared to be sleeping but I knew he wasn’t.

I laid there looking out the window for a moment wondering if I should just hop on him. He must’ve wanted to hook up too, right? And then I felt his hand creep across my tummy and in between my legs. He started rubbing me softly through my panties and it was exactly the right spot so I immediately started moaning. His hand quickened and became more urgent. I glanced over and he was still just laying there with his arm behind his head and his eyes closed. If anyone were to walk in, they wouldn’t be able to tell what was happening and that I was about to come hard as fuck. My legs started trembling and Eric – sensing how close I was – moved in quick, rough motions until I squealed with pleasure. And then he rolled over and went to sleep. It was kind of odd but absolutely satisfying.

*also: I will posting the Q&A Friday morning so comment, email, or tweet your last minute questions!

drunk reese comes out to play.

Between the launch of the Nantucket Cottage line, the warehouse sale, and the deal with the Indonesian artist, I was swamped on Monday and Tuesday. I didn’t get out of the office until almost midnight both days and obviously passed out as soon as I got home.

On Wednesday, I gave my ad team a long list of tasks to keep them busy and snuck out by 5:30 to meet Kendra for drinks. We went to a place in between both of our jobs and got a pitcher of sangria. It was gone before I even finished recapping my day so we ordered another. And another. After a while, I needed a bathroom break but it was one of those singular bathroom situations so Kendra told me she would meet me outside. Which was honestly kind of offensive because we always go into the bathroom together. But whatever.

Is it just me or do you never realize how drunk you are until you’re alone in a bathroom? I was sitting on the toilet handling my business, giggling like a fucking weirdo. While I was washing my hands I realized that I wanted to see Eric. I hadn’t heard from him all day even though he usually texts me in the morning. I pulled out my phone and called him, but he didn’t answer. Determined, I tried again and he picked up. That’s more like it.

“Hello?” The background sounded loud, like he was in a bar or something.

“Hey E!” I shouted. I had never called him “E” nor had he given me permission to.

“Hi Reese. How are you?” he replied.

“I’m good. I miss you. Wanna hang out?”

“I’m a little bit busy right now. Can we tomorrow?”

Drunk Reese does not like rejection.

“Why? What are you doing?”

“I’m at a bar watching the game with my friends,” he said.

“So your friends are more important than me?”

It sounded like he stepped outside or into the bathroom because the background noise went away.

“I didn’t say that,” Eric said.

“I’ve been busy all week. Don’t you even want to see me?” I cried.

“I do want to see you, Reese, but I’m busy right now.”

“If you really want to see me, come and get me.”

“I can’t right now.”

“So you don’t want to see me. Wow, Eric, I hope your friends are really worth it!”

He let out a deep sigh. “Are you serious right now, Reese?”

“Dead!” I exclaimed.

He paused for a moment before saying, “Where are you?”

I told him and he said he would be there in fifteen minutes. I emerged from the bathroom and Kendra said, “What took so long?”

“I’m leaving,” I announced.

“Um okay. Where are you going?” she asked.

“Eric is coming to get me,” I said, happily.

We still had a quarter pitcher of sangria left so I insisted we finish it before leaving. When we got outside, sure enough Eric was waiting at the curb in his Bentley.

“Do you want a ride home?” I asked Kendra, who had taken the subway to the restaurant.

She said sure so we climbed in.

“Hiiiiii,” I sang. “You remember Kendra, don’t you? She just lives a few minutes away.”

Eric turned to Kendra in the backseat and said hello. I talked nonstop the entire way to Kendra’s while they listened and didn’t say anything. She thanked him for the ride and gave him what looked like a “good luck” look.

“Did you want to come over?” Eric asked as we left Kendra’s apartment. He sounded exasperated.

“Duh!” I said. I insisted he stop at a 7-11 so I could use the restroom again and get some Twizzlers (I don’t even like Twizzlers).

When we got to his condo, I immediately stripped off my dress and wedges and sat on his sectional eating my Twizzlers. Eric turned on the game and sat next to me, but didn’t say anything. I totally planned on going to his place and having wild, raunchy sex, but Drunk Reese passed out.

This morning, I woke up next to Eric in his bed. I felt awful about the stunt I pulled, but I’m not good at apologizing so I just gave him the best blow job of his life instead. He dropped me off at home so I could get ready for work and told me he would be busy but in touch. It irritated me a bit that he was claiming busy when I was actually the one who would be busy. But whatever.

hot mess in high heels.

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