don’t drink and shop.

Kendra and I needed to go shopping for Thanksgiving so we did that during the day on Wednesday. Brady had to work, but insisted I take his credit card to pay for everything. I’m not exactly sure what we got, but we spent almost $400.

Kendra kept saying, “Are you sure he won’t mind?”

And I assured her that he insisted on paying. I mean, he did, right? And it’s not like he gave me a limit or anything. I still got rid of the receipt immediately just in case even though he probably won’t even notice. 

Kendra was making the major foods at her house and put Carly and me in charge of a few of the sides, dessert and setting the table. I threw some things in the oven then started setting the table. Then Carly showed up and she brought alcohol so the two of us started taking shots. Since Brady and Chris were downstairs, Carly and I took over Brady’s room and started getting ready and gossiping about Preston. He legitimately has two boyfriends now.

“Get this!” Carly said, doing the hideous open mouthed mascara face in the mirror. “Mr. Murphy and Preston are going to dinner tonight, like an expensive seven course thing. But he also has plans to make dinner with Dillon so he doesn’t know what to do.”

“He probably just shouldn’t participate in Thanksgiving this year,” I said.

“And then!” she exclaimed. “You know how Mr. Murphy gives him a weekly allowance? Well, he spends a ton of it on Dillon. He takes Dillon shopping and everything!”

We predicted that this situation is going to end badly.

I got dressed in a pair of One Teaspoon shorts, a sequin tank and a cardigan that I got a couple sizes too big so I could channel my inner Olsen Twin. 

Brady knocked on the door and when I opened it, he said, “Um, did you have something in the oven?”

I totally forgot that I was cooking. I scurried to the kitchen, but the pie and dinner rolls were almost black. Oops. Naturally, I blamed it on Carly.

“Carly, why didn’t you take the pie and dinner rolls out?” I shouted. She didn’t respond.

Luckily, Kendra showed up soon after that and we helped her bring everything in then I asked her to help me whip together some sides together. “Help” meaning she cooks while I finish my makeup.

Brady’s friends started showing up soon after that. First Jacob, Stacey, Dan, and a doughy cheeked guy I’ve never met named Paul showed up. Then that girl Brady works with that I met at his party came. She seems nice enough, but I don’t know why she was invited. Her name is Maddie and she came with her friend, Abby. I was really annoyed by their names.

Everyone started drinking and hanging out while we waited for the food to be ready. The doorbell rang and I announced that I would get it. I wasn’t sure who else we were expecting, but I wanted to be the first to see. 

I opened the door and Carly’s older brother, Kyle, was standing there. I think I’ve mentioned Kyle before, but we’ve had this ongoing flirtationship for years. We’ve never hooked up because Carly would kill me, but we flirt and tease each other endlessly. 

“Reese,” Kyle said, grinning. He’s so hot. He’s just like, a man, you know? He’s tall and fit and even though he had on a backward cap I could see that his blonde hair has grown out and was peeking out down by his neck.

“Hey Kyle,” I smiled back.

Kyle snaked an arm under my cardigan and around my waist and I could feel his cold fingers on my skin. I hugged him back lightly and he kissed me on my cheek as he pulled away. “Long time no see. How have you been?”

“Fabulous,” I sang. “Carly didn’t tell me you were coming.”

“I wasn’t going to turn down Thanksgiving dinner in the city. What did you cook?”

“Everything,” I lied walking away.

I had no idea that Chris and Kyle had never met, but I watched Carly introduce them. Then she stood there biting her nails hoping they would hit it off. It was so cute.

Finally, all the food was ready and we set up a buffet so everyone could load their own plates. I packed my plate with turkey, green bean casserole and mashed potatoes then made a glass of wine and tequila (sangrila). I sat next to Brady and Kendra sat on the other side of me and Kyle was sitting directly across. He kept making eye contact with me and smirking and winking. I hadn’t formally introduced Brady as my boyfriend to him, but I’m sure he got the memo.

Someone suggested we go around the table and say what we’re thankful for. Ugh. I hate shit like that. Everyone was saying that they are thankful for their families and their friends and Kendra said she was thankful for the opportunity to be a lawyer. It was so cheesy.

When it was my turn, I told everyone that I thought the little activity was stupid, but I was thankful for tequila. Then I made us do a toast.

After I finished my drink, I turned to Brady and said, “Can you make me another drink? I don’t feel like getting up. Three parts tequila, one part wine.”

“Sure,” he said and stood up.

That Paul guy must have been watching and he said, “Dude, you’re so pussy whipped,” to Brady.

I smiled. Brady is “pussy whipped” just because he was willing to make me a drink? That’s a little ridiculous I think. Brady didn’t deny it and just shrugged and went to make my drink.

Eventually we all made our way downstairs to continue drinking/watch football. Carly, Kyle and I were kind of huddled together catching up since we hadn’t seen Kyle in a while. He’s moving to the city from the suburbs for a job so we were mostly talking about that. The condo he’s looking at isn’t far from my apartment and I told him.

“Oh yeah?” Kyle said, slinging his arm around my neck. “You’ll have to show me around the neighborhood.”

I giggled and pushed him off playfully while Carly shot me a dirty look. Brady appeared next to me at that exact moment. He looked from me to Kyle and smiled politely.

“Hi,” I said guiltily. This would probably be considered flirting.

“Hey. I’ll be over there,” Brady said and gestured to somewhere across the room. 

I decided to leave the Kyle situation alone and go find my boyf. I saw Mabby on the way there and asked if they were having fun.

“Not as much fun as you,” Maddie said smiling and I sensed some shade.

“Well, not a lot of people can be as fun as me,” I said, walking off. I was going to stay and passive aggressively tell her that she needed to lighten up and trim her split ends, but decided against it. Maturity – 1, Drunk Reese – 0.

I found Brady sitting in a chair talking to his friends and I plopped down on his lap/the arm of the chair.

“Hey lover,” I said affectionately. “I missed you.”

“Me too,” he said, kissing me on the cheek.

And then I heard that Paul guy, the same one who called Brady pussy whipped, say, “Goddamn, can you take your girlfriend’s titty out of your mouth for five minutes?”

He said it in a low voice and didn’t mean for me to hear, but I heard.

“You’re fucking rude!” I blurted out.

Paul gave me a shit eating grin and said something like, “You really picked a good one, Brady.”

“Where’s your girlfriend, ugly?” I demanded.

Paul laughed which only made me more mad.

“And as much as you clearly love Wendy’s, that doesn’t count.”

“Reese, stop,” Brady said gently.

I spun around to face him. “Me? Why are you taking his side? He started it!”

Brady gave me a look that said, “Just shut up and we’ll talk about it later.”

I got up and stormed off. I met up with Kendra and told her what happened. She rolled her eyes and said something about me always making a scene. Whatever. I wasn’t just going to let him say whatever he wanted. People were starting to trickle out including that asshole Paul. I hope I scared him away. 

Brady found me and mentioned that he and Chris wanted to go to Best Buy so as the last few guests were leaving, I changed into something warmer so I could tag along. I’m usually not into Black Friday shopping, but I was drunk and kind of just wanted to see the shit show.

When we got to Best Buy, it was surprisingly not that crowded. I was expecting/hoping for lines, fights, riots, tasers, etc. Brady and Chris were looking for DVDs or something lame and I followed along for a little while. Then I got bored and wandered off. A guy who worked there saw me walking around aimlessly and asked what I was shopping for.

“Oh, nothing really,” I said.

He insisted on showing me some of the deals they were having so I followed him around the store. He showed me a laptop that I definitely don’t need, but it was on such a good deal that I had to get it. He also showed me an iPad that I decided I could get and give to someone as a gift. Then we looked at the Beats headphones which were over half off. I need a nice pair of headphones for when I run and work out so I told the guy that I wanted those too. I also picked up an e-reader to reads books on, a case for it, a phone case, a keyboard for the iPad, and a green Kitchenaid stand mixer. 

We ran into Brady on the way to the cash register. He looked at my full cart and gave me a confused look. “What is all this?”

“Just some stuff I need,” I said. I was feeling judged so I told him I would meet him at the registers.

In total, including the geek squad protection for my laptop, I spent over two grand. I felt like I got good deals (except later I found out that the laptop was only $50 off so I was swindled).

After Brady and Chris paid for their things, I made Brady load my things in the car while I watched.

“Jesus, Reese,” Brady said as he put my new mixer in the backseat. “What did you do?!”

“What?” I replied defensively. “Those are all gifts and they were good deals.”

But now I’m kind of regretting buying all that stuff.

I met with my potential new boss on Friday morning. I woke up hungover so I took two Advil, drank a glass of water and put on about six layers of concealer under my eyes. We met for coffee and I knew what he looked like because I’d stalked his LinkedIn profile. I immediately found him sitting in the back of the coffee shop with a laptop.

I walked to the side of his table and he looked up from his laptop at me curiously, flicking his eyes over my body and face.  

“I’m Reese,” I told him.

“Reese!” he exclaimed, surprised, and stood up to shake my hand.

His name is Andrew and he is tall with dark hair and warm dark eyes. Andrew kind of reminds me of Freddie Prinze, Jr. He’s good looking for sure, but I could tell that he’s past his peak. He probably used to be the fucking man in high school and college, but the partying caught up with him. He’s probably only a couple years older than me.

We sat down and small talked for a while and then even though Kate told me it would be a casual meeting, Andrew pulled out an interview guide and started asking me questions. I wasn’t really prepared for this, but I surprised myself with how well I was talking about profit and loss, target markets, employee coaching and overall business acumen. 

An hour later, Andrew said, “Reese, I think you would be a really good fit for this position. However I’m going to be bluntly honest with you.”

I really had no idea what he was going to say. He looked down at his notes and kind of sighed then said, “As a sales director, you would be in charge of sales managers and assistants who have years and years of experience. A lot of them will probably be older than you. I’m a little concerned about you being taken seriously.”

I swallowed and blinked a few times. That was not what I was expecting at all. Taken seriously? What the fuck was that supposed to mean? 

“I mean, I’ve not had a problem being taken seriously thus far…” I said slowly.

“Maybe ‘taken seriously’ isn’t the correct term,” Andrew said. “But you’re a young, great looking woman. I don’t think that is what anyone will be expecting from a sales director. This is a high caliber job, you know.”

I’m not a feminist by any stretch, but a woman can’t be taken seriously in a “high caliber job?” That’s rude. 

What he said left a bad taste in my mouth, but something about Andrew made me really like him. The way he shook my hand was so personal and warm, I suddenly had visions of innocently flirting with him and tricking him into giving me extra vacation days.

Kendra and I got dinner and drinks on Friday night and I told her what happened with Andrew. 

“Reese, that isn’t legal,” she told me. “He can’t say that to you. It’s offensive and illegal.”

Even though Kendra’s probably right, I’m not going to like, press charges on him. If he doesn’t think I can handle the job, then that’s his loss. Plenty of people think I can be taken seriously.

On Saturday night, the gang (me, Brady, Carly, Chris, Preston and Dillon) planned on going out. We hit up a night club first and drank and danced and had a really fun time. I didn’t get us a VIP table, but one of the bartenders gave us all free shots and took them with us.

After a while, Brady and Chris said that they were going to a bar close by. Since the rest of us were still having fun, I told them we would meet them there later. After they left, Carly confronted me in the bathroom about her brother.

“Ya know, Brady asked me about you and Kyle,” she said.

“What did he say?” I asked with wide eyes.

“He wanted to know if you guys have history or if Kyle likes you. I obviously said no.” Carly cut her eyes to me in the mirror, looking stern. 

That made me feel really awful. If only Brady knew how little of a threat Kyle is. If I wanted Kyle, I would have had him.

After we left the bathroom, I texted Brady to see where they were. He didn’t respond right away, but we still closed out our tabs preparing to leave. When we got outside, Brady still hadn’t responded so I suggested we go to a bar around the corner. I figured we could waste time until I heard back. I started talking to this hot black lawyer and decided he would be perfect for Kendra. I introduced them and then lied about having to go to the bathroom so they could have some alone time.

I ended up going to the bathroom and calling Brady, but he didn’t answer. I texted him, “You need to answer your phone so we can find you!!!!”

I went back out there and found Kendra, but the lawyer was gone.

“Did you get his number?” I asked excitedly.

Kendra made a face. “Uh no. He’s weird. And the law school he went to isn’t even Top 25 or anything.”

“Kendra!” I exclaimed. “Who cares what law school he went to. Don’t you want to get laid?!”

She gave me a dirty look and ended the conversation. We hung out at the bar until it closed and since Brady never called me back, I took an Uber home with Kendra and Carly.

I didn’t hear from Brady again until he called me on Sunday morning.

“Hey. I ended up coming home and passing out last night. I didn’t even make it to the bar,” he said.

I didn’t want to argue with him or question him and start a fight so I just said, “Oh.”

“I’m really sorry. I didn’t even drink that much so I must have been extremely tired,” Brady went on.

“Yeah,” was all I could think to say. I wasn’t about to pretend to be okay with this, but I also didn’t want to argue.

Brady asked if I wanted to come over, but I told him I had plans with Kendra. Kendra did ask me to go to church with her and I declined, but after talking to Brady, I changed my mind.

Brady and I didn’t talk for the rest of the day.

Standard

have i let myself go?

Since the trip to NYC was so last minute, I waited until the last minute to pack. I only packed my interview outfit, travel outfit and of course my entire makeup collection because I wasn’t sure what look I wanted to go for. Brady drove me to the airport and on the plane, I practiced some interview questions/worked on my Pinterest wedding/drank martinis. 

By the time I got to New York and checked into my hotel it was after midnight and I was exhausted. My interview was at 8:00 AM so I quickly showered and then fell sleep right away. 

I set my alarm for 6:00 on Saturday morning so I would have an hour to get ready and an hour to get to my interview. When my alarm went off, I seriously considered snoozing until 8:00 then skipping my interview and exploring the city for a few hours. It’s not like I’m dying for a new job anyway. I could tell Kate that I missed my flight and never made it to NYC, but thanks for the opportunity.

But I’m working on being a more responsible adult so I rolled out of bed, got dressed with my eyes closed and swiped on mascara and concealer. I was out the door by 6:50 so I had time to grab breakfast and a latte. Luckily, Kate was nice enough to book my hotel not far from the building where the headquarters are located and I was able to make it there walking, in less than thirty minutes.

The interview itself was pretty painless. I met with the vp of sales and the director of stores – two girls in their early 30s. One was tall and had on a very New York City outfit: black tights, oversized black tunic, steep black booties and eyeliner. The other woman was tiny and Asian and was the exact opposite of the first woman. She looked like an Easter basket with all her bright colors and jewelry. They asked me a bunch of behavior based questions which I’m super good at. As you guys may or may not know, I’m really good at telling stories. 

The taller woman was trying really hard to be intimidating and refused to smile or acknowledge my answers. The Asian girl was really nice though. After the interview, they took me on a tour of the office and I got to see the design suite and the little test store they use to plan the floorplan for all the other stores. It was all really cool. Then they started telling me about past sales directors who had since been promoted to cool jobs like the new store opening coordinator who travels opening the new stores and buyer who decides what things each store sells. And if you do get promoted they will fund your move to NYC. This got me excited. I could finally fulfill my dream of living in New York! The taller girl even said she used to be a sales director and just worked her way up. You would think that would make her more humble, but I guess not. 

As we were wrapping everything up, the Asian girl said, “It was so nice meeting you, Reese. I think you would be a great fit for our brand.”

I beamed. After visiting the headquarters and talking to them about the possibilities for growth, I could really see myself working for the company. They are so much more in touch with current fashion trends and technology. As much as I try to get my company more on trend, Dave and Diana like to stick to what they know – which is muted colors and bland silhouettes. They don’t even understand why we need an iPhone app.

But then the taller girl decided to piss on my parade. “If we decide to move forward with you, you’ll be contacted by Kate. If not, thanks for your time.”

Bitch.

After the interview I had to run back to the hotel and book it to the airport to make my flight home. I really wished I had time to explore especially because there were so many cute boutiques on the way to my hotel.

I slept the entire flight home and Brady was waiting for me at the airport. It was like back to reality.

“How did it go?” Brady asked on the way home.

“Fine,” I sighed. “One of the interviewers was kind of a bitch so I probably won’t get it.”

He told me not to think negatively and he thinks I probably will get an offer, etc. I didn’t want to tell him how much I was actually hoping for an offer so that way if one didn’t come, I could pretend I didn’t care. 

But whatever. All I really wanted to do was eat and have sex with my boyfriend. We stopped and got food then took it to Brady’s to eat. I asked him what he did Friday night and he told me that he and Chris “stayed home.”

After we ate, I forced Brady into his room and had my way with him. Not that it took much. After that I made Brady come with me shopping. He’s never been shopping with me and I think being a good shopping partner is  a vital relationship requirement. I need a man who will be involved, but not too involved, who will endorse all of my purchases, who will not try to make sense of my shopping strategy and most importantly, who will carry my shopping bags and/or purse.

By the time we made it to Nordy’s, I had accumulated four bags and Brady suggested we stop and put them in the car. I spun around; giving him a pitying smile. What a newb. 

“We can’t drop anything off yet,” I explained, gently. “I might need to match things before I buy them so we have to keep it all with us.”

Brady gave me a weird look, but said okay. I did a quick lap around Nordstrom and picked up a pair of booties, a scarf, a pair of sunglasses, a watch and a dress that I’ll probably return.

After we left Nordstrom, the annual lights parade was happening and I insisted we stay and watch it because sometimes I’m a child. It ended soon after that so I missed the majority of it.

There was a really happy atmosphere in the city on Saturday evening. I don’t know if it was from the parade or all the tourists visiting or the fact that it wasn’t blisteringly cold, but I texted all my friends and insisted we get dressed up and go to the club.

Carly and Kendra came over to pregame and I decided to wear a black dress, So Kates, and red lipstick. We took Uber to the club and Brady and Chris met us there.

When Brady saw me he said, “Wow, you look really beautiful.”

Lol, what a nerd. I feel like he hardly ever compliments me anymore so I took it. Maybe I’ve let myself go since getting in a relationship. Doesn’t that happen to people?

Somehow I got us a complimentary table in VIP by talking to a bartender and the manager told us to order whatever we wanted. Don’t mind if I do. I ordered us a bottle of rosé and bottles of top shelf tequila and vodka.

I told myself that I wasn’t going to get drunk, but I got drunk. Kendra and Carly did too so we ran around and danced. There’s just nothing like drinking on someone else’s tab. While we were down on the main dance floor, we ran into Derrick and another one of our friends from college, Ronnie.

I momentarily forgot about the falling out Derrick and I had and ran over to them and pulled them into hugs.

“Oh my God, Ronnie!” I screamed, using my Sammi Sweetheart accent.

Ronnie used to have house parties almost every single night in college. He was friends with me and also my ex and we would have so many drunk heart to hearts. He was the number one supporter of our relationship. 

“Reese! We were just talking about you!” Ronnie said.

“What did you say?” I asked, glaring at Derrick. 

“I was thinking about texting you and asking you to come out tonight,” Ronnie said. “But you’re here anyway so it worked out.”

I smiled and invited them to our table. On the way there, Derrick fell into step next to me and said, “How have you been?”

I can’t lie, I was impressed that even after the falling out we had, he was still being nice and cordial.

We got to our table and I introduced everyone to Ronnie. I ordered us another bottle meanwhile hoping that “order whatever you want” meant that it was on the house. I never actually clarified that with the manager.

We all sat down and I leaned over to Ronnie to catch up. He lives in LA now and was just visiting Chicago for the weekend. I’m actually kind of offended that he didn’t text me and let me know beforehand because I thought we were friends. But whatever.

We were having a pleasant conversation and then Ronnie said, “You know, [ex whose name I refuse to say, type, or think] has been asking about you lately. He misses you.”

My blood stopped pumping and I’m sure my entire face went white. “What?”

“We see each other two or three times a week because our offices are a block from each other. Don’t you want to talk to him?” Ronnie continued.

I started to say, “Why would I want to talk to him?” but I only got to “Why-” before I started sobbing.

Brady was sitting on the other side of me and immediately put his arm around me and asked what was wrong. When I didn’t answer, he looked at Ronnie and said, “What did you do to her?”

I heard Derrick say, “She’s fine. She’s drunk. She cries about everything when she’s drunk.”

True.

“What did I do?” Ronnie asked, sounding genuinely confused. Poor guy.

“Nothing. She’s being dramatic,” Derrick said.

“Fuck off,” Brady said and my head jerked toward him, shocked. Brady is usually so laidback and non-confrontational.

“It’s fine,” I sniffled, trying to smooth over the situation. I looked around for Kendra and Carly. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

I stood up and grabbed them then forced them to go the bathroom with me. They both started touching up their makeup and hair while I explained to them what Ronnie said.

“Do you think he really misses me?” I asked.

Kendra spun around, slapping Carly in the face with her weave. “Who gives a fuck if he misses you? That piece of trash deserves to be single and miserable forever.”

My eyes grew wide. 

“Seriously, fuck him. I can’t believe you’re even pretending to care. You have an amazing boyfriend who is in love with you.”

I felt more tears forming. Kendra was totally right. Why was I even entertaining the fact that [redacted] claims he misses me? He’s probably just lonely.

I cleaned myself up then skipped back out there. I couldn’t wait to hug my boyfriend and plan our drunk future.

“Hi baaaabe,” I squealed, jumping on Brady’s lap. I planted a kiss on him, leaving my lipstick all over his lips. It was cute.

“You okay?” he asked.

“So I’ve been thinking,” I said excitedly. “I wouldn’t mind moving to Massachusetts. It seems peaceful.”

“Really?”

Brady seemed happy that I am willing to settle down with him in Massachusetts and we were right in the middle of designing our peaceful little cabin in the woods when Ronnie appeared in front of us.

“It was good seeing you, Reese,” he said. “Maybe we can catch up tomorrow or something.” And then he looked at Brady for approval like he’s some sort of controlling boyfriend. Lol! 

I didn’t end up meeting Ronnie before he went home, but I did text him apologizing for my tantrum (if that’s what you want to call it) and assured him that it wasn’t his fault. If anyone kind of understands, it’s Ronnie. He was there for the entire fucked up relationship.

On Monday night, Kate called me.

“Hey, love,” she said in her super cute accent. “How did your interview go?”

“I don’t know,” I said, honestly. “I left feeling really indifferent.”

“They loved you,” she revealed.

“Really?” I asked, surprised. “Even the tall girl?”

“They both did. Josie [the Asian girl] raved about you all day and asked where I found you. Honestly, I think you got it.”

Wow. Even though an offer hadn’t been officially made, I was already feeling nauseous at the thought of having to decide if I was going to take it.

“I know you’re probably so sick of interviews, but there’s one more person I want you to meet,” Kate said.

She explained that she wanted me to meet with the guy who would be my immediate boss. He is in charge of the region I would be taking over and another region. Kate said that it wouldn’t really be a formal interview, but just kind of a casual meeting to make sure that we are on the same wavelength since we would be working together. He will be in Chicago on Friday and she said she gave him my number so he is going to call me to set up a time and place.

After I hung up with Kate, I called my mom. I hadn’t told her about the possible new job at all, but now that an offer might be in the cards, I wanted to know what she thought.

She answered the phone and proceeded to tell me that one of her friends showed her pictures of me on Facebook from over the weekend and she wanted to know how I got my hair like it was. So I had to explain to her that I used a curling wand and that she actually has a curling wand at home that she never uses. My mom is so exhausting. 

Finally, I explained to her the job situation and asked her what I should do.

“If they offer you more money, take it!” she said without missing a beat.

“What about my current job? And Diana?” I asked.

“Oh babe, Diana doesn’t expect you to be there forever. You’re young. This is the time where you can hop from job to job until you find something you like. I had thirty jobs when I was in college.”

“Mom, I’m not in college. I can’t just job hop. And I like my job. That’s the problem. Should I risk leaving the job I like for a job I only think I would like better?”

“I don’t think you should pass up an opportunity like this,” my mom said.

Then she started complaining about how my dad has been spending a lot of time at work lately and in fact, he wasn’t even home yet. Then he came home and she hung up.

So I guess I’ll just meet with the guy on Friday and see what happens. I figured when they wanted to fly me to New York that I probably already had it, but still. You never know.

My parents haven’t mentioned coming for Thanksgiving any more so I’m not counting on it. Everyone is going to be here in the city for the holiday so we’re going to have a big Friendsgiving feast at Brady and Chris’s. Kendra is going to do most of the cooking obviously, but Carly and I will help.

I hope y’all have a happy Thanksgiving! ❤

Standard

dick sucking culprit.

I planned on staying in for the entire weekend so on Friday night I had Kendra over for movies and wine. A chill night was definitely needed and we just reminisced about the debauchery that was college. 

On Saturday, I went shopping with Preston and Dillon in the afternoon. I didn’t really need anything, but I told them I would tag along for moral support. I ended up getting a multipurpose bag and a skirt.

That night Carly wanted to go out. I dragged my feet until 10:00 and then decided that fine, I would go out, but only for two hours.

We ended up at a bar not far from my apartment. The whole gang was there – Kendra, Carly, Preston, and me and Carly bought us a round of tequila shots. It was actually kind of nice to be out without the boys like old times. I feel like lately, Brady, Chris and John are omnipresent.

Carly and I ended up getting drunk before we even left the first bar because some things never change. We left the bar and went outside to find the next place to go. Directly across the street was a club/lounge and next door was another bar. I remember Jessica posting something on Facebook about going to the club/lounge for her friend’s birthday and since I was drunk, I thought it would be a good idea to go there. We weren’t really dressed to go to a club, but I had  never talked to Jessica without Brady around and I wanted to. What were the chances of us being in the same vicinity at the same time? Like I said, I don’t believe in coincidences. It was meant to be. 

I suggested we go across the street without telling any of them why and Kendra scrunched her nose. “No. Let’s just go to the bar.” 

I grabbed Carly’s hand and ran into the street (in front of a cab who honked at us) and Kendra and Preston had no choice but follow. The place was huge and kind of empty and there were two floors, three separate bars and couches everywhere. The last time I was there, one of my friends had to be carried out by security because she blacked out. Good times.

We ran to one of the bars and ordered drinks. It was a whiskey bar which was annoying, but I got a whiskey sour. We took our drinks to the dance floor and danced to old ass 90’s music. I was on the lookout for Jessie and couldn’t wait to confront her. The place was really dark so I couldn’t really see anything so I decided to just drink and have fun instead.

Carly and I went to another bar and got some kind of delicious cucumber lime cocktail. We took our drinks to a couch and sat down to check our phones. Brady was keeping me in the loop about everything he was doing and I appreciated that. I made one of the guys sitting on the couch across from us take a picture of me and Carly to send to Brady. After that, we started talking to four kind of cute finance guys for a while. I made sure to talk about my boyfriend a lot since Carly thinks I’m a flirt.

We met back up with Kendra and Preston and decided to make our way to the next place since this place was dead. I had kind of forgotten about Jessica as we made our way outside. I almost squealed with delight when I saw her standing with the two door men and one of her bland friends. She was wearing a really tight dress and all I could think about was the fact that I have naked pictures of her saved in my phone.

“Oh my gosh, hi Jessica!” I said loudly because she hadn’t seen me yet. I also wanted to subtly let my friends know that this was the dick sucking culprit who had a thing for my boyfriend. None of them had met her or knew what she looked like except Kendra because I obviously showed Jessica’s nudes to her.

Jessica looked really taken aback to see me and took a look at my plaid shirt, jeans, and riding boots (told you we weren’t dressed for a club) before breaking into a huge smile.

“Hey Reese! How are you?” She pulled me into a really fake hug which I found offensive. I patted her back lightly in lieu of a hug. “You’re not in San Francisco with Brady?”

How did that bitch know where my boyfriend was?

“Uh, no, I don’t give a fuck about a baseball game. These are my friends, Carly, Kendra and Preston.”

Carly and Kendra shook Jessica’s hand and then Preston said, “How do you two know each other?”

“She works with Brady,” I informed him even though he obviously already knew.

“Oh. Ohhh. Nice to meet you, Jessica,” Preston said, shaking her hand.

“Wow so I can’t believe you didn’t want to go to the World Series,” Jessica said, smiling like a psychopath.

I guess I technically wasn’t invited and maybe she knew that and was throwing shade in my direction. I ignored her comment. I wanted to stay and interrogate her, but I also wanted her to know that I didn’t have time to waste talking to her so I said, “Well, we’re going to go inside to have fun somewhere. Bye!”

“Okay. See you around,” Jessica said in an almost sneaky kind of way.

“She’s definitely not as cute as you. She probably just gives really great head,” Preston said as we crossed the street.

I whacked his arm. “Preston!”

I know it wasn’t really the time since everyone was around, but I think Jessica should apologize to me. She knows that I don’t want her talking to Brady yet she continues being thirsty and throwing herself all over him.

After we hit up two or three more places, we headed back to Kendra’s to crash. As I was getting ready to fall asleep, I got a text from Brady that said, “We are going to another bar. I love you.”

I fell asleep before I could respond, but I was so excited when I read the message on Sunday morning. I’m sure he only said it because he was drunk, but I love that I have him saying he loves me in writing. 

Spoiler alert: I didn’t see Brady last night so I didn’t make him dinner or anything, but maybe tonight or tomorrow night. Besides dinner, what other cute, not super sappy things can I do? I’ve cooked for him already and I’m not the Pioneer Woman anyway so I want to do something else.

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halfway to fifty.

My birthday festivities started on Friday evening with an outlandish shopping spree with Preston and Carly in the suburbs. My parents transferred a ton of money into my bank account in lieu of a gift so I thought I would reward myself with a few new pieces.

I’m not even going to talk about how much I spent, but I found the perfect birthday dress plus a cute matching bra and panty set to wear for Brady after (and a bunch of things I needed for fall).

On Saturday, Carly surprised me with a mani/pedi/facial which was much needed. The spa had complementary champagne so we guzzled down that down while we gossiped. By the time we got out of there it was time to get ready for dinner so we met Preston at my apartment. We took shots (because birthday) and got ready with the music blasting.

Brady and Chris met us at my apartment so we could all taxi to the restaurant.

“You look very nice,” Brady said, following me into my room.

I was tromping around trying to find my clutch and said, “Thanks.”

I finally found it and headed toward the door.

Brady stepped in front of me to stop me from walking out. “Hey, I got you something.”

He handed me a small, white rectangular box. It was very light so I had no idea what it could be. 

“Thank you,” I said, hugging him. We pulled apart and kissed briefly so I didn’t get my pink lipstick all over him.

“The cab is here!” Pauly D Preston called from the living room.

I tossed the box on the bed to open later and we headed downstairs. Preston reserved a table at a fancy fusion restaurant and when we got there, there was a bottle of white wine chilling on the table.

Derrick and one of his friends were already there. Ugh. I thought after the big fight we had, he would’ve been too scared to show his face. Apparently not.

“Happy birthday, Reese,” Derrick said, standing up to greet me. He tried to grab me to hug me, but I stepped to the side to avoid him.

“Thanks Derrick!” I said with mock enthusiasm.

His face kind of fell as I walked past him and took my seat at the head of the table. All of our friends were there including two girls I used to work with showed up along with one of Preston’s exes. We had a nice dinner then Preston brought out the most delicious looking chocolate cake that had “Happy Halfway To 50 Reese!” written in pink. I was most offended that he would tempt me with the cake knowing my dress wasn’t going to allow me to have any. Asshole.

After dinner, the five of us plus Derrick and his friend headed to a rooftop to drink. Brady insisted on opening a tab for all of us because it was my birthday and why not? Naturally we started with tequila. I also ordered a beer and a martini and after I finished them, Carly and I took the obligatory trip to the ladies room. I told her how annoyed I was that Derrick showed up and she said that I needed to show him that Brady and I are together because obviously he wasn’t getting the message.

“So, I need to make out with Brady in front of him?” I clarified.

“Yeah, or something. And Brady will enjoy the PDA,” she smiled sinisterly.

We got back out there and found the guys near the bar. Brady and Derrick were standing next to each other which was already uncomfortable enough. 

“Heyyy, babe,” I cooed, throwing my whole body into him and then kissing him loudly. 

“Hey, do you want another drink?” Brady asked.

I glanced at Derrick to make sure he was watching and he was. I nodded.

“Be right back,” Brady said.

As soon as he walked away, Derrick said, “Are you doing this on purpose?”

I feigned surprise. “Doing what?!”

“You know what, Reese,” he said, looking annoyed.

“I honestly don’t. I’m just trying to enjoy my birthday.”

Derrick was silent for a minute and I glanced behind me to see if Brady was on his way back. I couldn’t see him in the crowd.

“Reese,” Derrick said.

I turned back to look at him and raised my eyebrows as if to say, “Hmm?”

“Reese, I like you.”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that,” I said, dismissively.

“And you know I like you,” he continued. “Does it make you feel good to throw your ‘boyfriend’ in my face? Because I think that’s a real bitch thing to do.”

I felt my face getting hot and my hands balling into fists at my side involuntarily.

“Excuse me?” I said to make sure he wanted to open this can of worms.

“Nothing,” Derrick sighed. “We’re going to go ahead and go. I hope you had a great birthday.”

He signaled his friend and they started to walk away.

“Bye Derrick! Thanks for coming!” I called after him sweetly. Then I remembered him not being able to get it up back in college and started laughing at the irony.

He turned back around and gave me a cold look, obviously catching my joke.

Brady came back with my signature drink – tequila and orange juice – and we met back up with Carly, Preston and Chris to take shots. After that, Brady and I ran off to dance and kiss and flirt and nurse our drinks. We were both super drunk and super horny and really couldn’t keep our hands off each other.

We were headed to the bar to get more drinks (which we didn’t need at all), when someone shrieked “Braaaaaddddyyyyy!”

It wasn’t until a blur of blonde hair flashed in front of me that I realized someone was actually shrieking at Brady. And that someone was the Jessica girl who I met at the charity event. She threw her arms around his neck and held him for three seconds longer than I was okay with. Then pulled away but kept an arm slung on his shoulders. “I didn’t know you were coming here tonight.”

“Yeah, it’s Reese’s birthday,” Brady said.

Jessica looked down at me with that shit eating grin on her face. “Hey. Happy b-day.” 

She touched my arm lightly, almost in a pitying way. And who says “b-day” out loud? It was like she was trying to downplay my birthday intentionally.

“You know Kelsey and Rach,” she said motioning toward her two friends standing nearby. They were two plain ass, vanilla white girls just like Jessica.

Brady gave them a head nod and Jessica said, “Reese, we should take a shot for your b-day!”

“We were actually headed to the bar right before you ambushed us,” I deadpanned. 

The five of us walked to the bar and Brady ordered us some fruity shot on his tab. It irritated me because he was supposed to be paying for drinks for me and my friends, not this bimbo and her ugly friends.

“Brady, I was telling Kelsey what you told me on Thursday. About the changes to the state board test,” Jessica said.

“Mmm, yes,” he replied and the three of them started talking about tests and licenses and certifications. Brady was being very professional and formal, but Jessica and her drunk friends kept giggling and interrupting and being so obnoxious. Like go away.

Eventually, I got really irritated and walked in between Brady and Jessica to the bar to get a glass of water.

“Well, we’ll let you guys enjoy your night,” I heard Jessica say. “I’ll see you Tuesday.” And as she and Thing 1 and Thing 2 were walking away, I saw her hand graze the side of Brady’s thigh quickly, but deliberately. It was such a subtle action that most people wouldn’t have noticed, but it made my heart speed up and jump to my throat.

“What the fuck is she doing here?” I demanded after they were gone. 

Brady looked taken aback. “I don’t know.”

“I just think it’s really weird that she just so happened to be where we are,” I said.

“I mean, this place is quite popular. Look at how packed it is.”

I didn’t bother looking around as I felt hot tears forming in my eyes.

“I can’t believe she’s here. She ruined my birthday!” I cried.

“Baby,” Brady said gently and put an arm around me pulling me close. He had never called me that ever nor do I like being called pet names. Usually. His soothing tone and affection was actually exactly what I needed.

He kissed my forehead and held me right there for a few moments. “Reese, it’s okay.”

“I want to go home,” I sniffled.

“Okay. Let’s go tell our friends we’re leaving.”

Brady and I walked around until we found Carly, Chris and Preston huddled by the bar.

“Hey, we’re going to go,” Brady said to them.

“What’s wrong, doll face? You look upset,” Preston said, pulling me away from Brady.

“Well, that fugly girl Brady works with is here and she fucking touched his thigh and said ‘happy b-day’ to me,” I hissed.

“She touched his thigh?” Preston exclaimed. 

“Shh!” I glanced over my shoulder to make sure Brady hadn’t heard. I wanted to confront him about it, but not right there.

Brady and I were walking away when Preston shouted, “Love you, Reesie Cup! Have a ton of birthday sex tonight!”

Brady turned and waved before we went outside and got a cab. Brady gave the cabbie his address and paid the man when we got out. When we got inside I immediately started getting undressed in the living room.

“Do you want water?” Brady asked, heading toward the kitchen. I shrugged even though he couldn’t see me. He returned a moment later with two water bottles and sat one in front of me. He fell onto the couch beside me.

I took a long gulp of water then turned to Brady. “Take off your clothes.”

He didn’t even hesitate before pulling his shirt over his head and unbuckling his jeans. I reached over and pumped him a few times before climbing on.

I began bouncing up and down really hard while simultaneously sucking his neck and chest. He threw his head back and I continued sucking hard, purposefully trying to leave marks. I was crashing down on his dick too with force, like I was trying to prove to him and Jessica that he’s mine.

Brady squeezed my butt tight and tried to pull me off as his body tensed up. But I kept going until he grunted and relaxed. I could already see a swollen hickey forming on the side of his neck. Perfect.

“Wow,” he sighed, completely out of breath even though he really didn’t do anything.

I smiled at my accomplishment. We gathered our clothes and went to his room to get in bed.

“I’m sorry you didn’t have a good birthday,” he said once we were settled and laying side by side.

“It was okay,” I replied. Besides the whole Jessica ordeal and the fact that my best friend couldn’t make it, I’d had fun.

“Reese,” Brady put a hand on my naked waist. “I really like you.”

I beamed. Even though Derrick had uttered those exact words just hours before, it felt so much better coming from Brady.

“You’re amazing. I think I’m falling for you.”

I’ve never had a guy tell me they were falling for me and honestly, what does that even mean? I looked at Brady and his eyes were barely open, just small slits. He was obviously seconds away from passing out.

We woke up just before noon and I had a massive headache and a dry mouth. It could’ve been way worse though. Two points for Drunk Reese.

“Morning,” Brady said, turning toward me.

We kissed and then decided to shower to wash the club/bar filth off us. Obviously this turned into slippery shower sex and then he scrubbed me clean.

We got out and wrapped up in towels and I complained that I still felt like shit. My tummy was doing some crazy acrobatics. 

“Give me a second. I’ll make you something that’ll fix everything,” Brady said. He threw on a pair of sweats and disappeared into the hallway. 

I put on a t-shirt and some shorts and waited several minutes for Brady to come back. When he finally did, he had two glasses filled with an orangey liquid.

“This stuff works. I used to make it for the guys at the house all the time,” he said.

I grabbed a glass from him and asked, “What house?”

I took a sip of the drink. It tasted like orange juice, but I could also taste a hint of cilantro and carrot so it was really yummy and fresh. It burned a little bit going down so I could tell it was spiked with tequila.

“The fraternity house,” Brady said.

“You were in a fraternity?” I asked, surprised. Brady never, ever mentioned being in a fraternity to me. But that explained why he is so good at partying.

“Uh, yeah. Didn’t we talk about that?” 

I shook my head. “Never. I had no idea.”

We finished our drinks and Brady stood up to collect our glasses.

“Hey, my parents are going to be in the city tomorrow. Do you want to meet them?” he asked.

Brady must have saw how wide my eyes got because he quickly said, “It’s not a big deal. They’re going to a yacht party and wanted us to come. They’re cool.”

I waited a full thirty seconds before saying, “Okay.”

I don’t know what to expect from Brady’s parents. I know that they are pretty important people, but other than that nothing. I’m usually really good with parents (Kendra’s folks adore me), but what if they think I’m stupid and hate me?

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i feel like you’re judging me.

On Saturday morning when I woke up, I had an iMessage from Brady. It said, “Up for a run this morning?” 

It was from thirty minutes prior and while I did not particularly want to go for a run, I did want to see Brady. I replied, “Yes.”

“Should I come and get you? We can run by the lake.”

“Give me thirty minutes,” I told him. 

I jumped out of bed, showered and threw on lululemon shorts and a t-shirt from college. I hoped Brady didn’t want to run far because I was fucking tired and didn’t want to sweat my face off. 

Brady called exactly thirty minutes later and let me know that he was waiting outside my apartment. I grabbed my wallet in case he wanted to get breakfast afterward and met him downstairs.

“Morning,” he said when I got in the car. He drove us to the beach a little bit south of both of our apartments, away from the Lollapalooza and tourist craziness. 

We stretched and he told me we could do a short run (“only” two miles). I silently prayed before we began that I could pull this off like I did the 5K. I’m still recovering from that by the way. 

Prayer works. I managed to finish the run – alive and not completely drenched in sweat. I even managed to talk to Brady about the weeks we’d had at work. Afterwards, we walked a short “cool down” lap and Brady mentioned that there was a pizza place he wanted to try. At first he just kept talking about how he heard it was really good and they had a large beer selection and yada, yada, yada then finally he asked if I wanted to go with him later that evening.

I, of course, said yes and he said that he would reserve us a table and pick me up later.

I spent the majority of the day out shopping with Preston. We had paid off our credit cards so we were celebrating by maxing them out again. And also I needed something to wear for my pizza and beer date so he helped me. 

Brady texted me at 6:30 letting me know our table would be ready at 7:30. Luckily I had already showered and blow dried my hair because an hour is just not enough time to get ready. I’ll have to let him know for next time.

The place was packed, but Brady valeted his car so he didn’t have to find parking. Our table was right by the large open window that faced the street and we ordered a pizza with a ton of random toppings on it (I mean, sundried tomatoes? So unnecessary) and a pitcher of some craft beer the waitress recommended.

Brady asked what I did with my day and I told him about celebrating paying my credit card off.

“That seems a little counterproductive,” he said.

“I feel like you’re judging me.”

“No way. I’m offended that you think I would judge you.”

“I’m offended that you would call my day counterproductive.”

“My apologies. I’m sure you have a logical reason for your actions today.”

Was this our first fight?

“Thank you. I get cash rewards for spending a certain amount. How could I not participate in that?”

“You make a compelling argument, Reese. Cash rewards are certainly a lucrative incentive.”

I just wanted to shake him. Did he ever snap out of it? The night went on with us playfully bantering back and forth like that. Even though he talks like a college professor sometimes, we have the same sarcastic sense of humor. And, he knows how to have fun. After we finished our pizza and beer he ordered us tequila shots. It’s like he knows the way to my heart. After we left the pizza place he invited me back to his place. Chris was home (sans Carly who was nannying) and the three of us drank beer out on the patio. I felt like one of the guys. 

Eventually Chris went inside to bed, but Brady and I stayed outside. At around midnight or one am we were tired and slap happy and laughing at anything and everything.

“I’m tired,” Brady said, yawning. “Do you want to just stay here and I can take you home in the morning?” 

Oh my God. Immediately I thought of Kendra. She would definitely tell me not to do it – we had been drinking and things could happen. I wasn’t supposed to have sex with him. But he didn’t feel like taking me home. What was I supposed to do, walk? 

“Okay,” I said. 

We went inside to his room and he started pulling out extra blankets and sheets and a t-shirt for me to sleep in. I changed, got in his bed and started getting comfy.

“Well it appears that you’ve already claimed the bed. I’ll go sleep in the basement,” Brady said.

He tucked a blanket under his arm and reached for one of the pillows on the bed. I grabbed his arm. 

“You can stay here with me,” I told him as if it was actually my bed. 

He didn’t object. Instead, he changed into just shorts with no shirt, flipped off the light then climbed into bed with me. I noticed another small tattoo on his chest and made note to ask about it later. 

“I’m physically unable to sleep with a shirt on,” he explained. 

What about laying horizontally makes you lose inhibitions? That’s pillow talk, I guess.

“Brady, have you ever had a girlfriend?” I asked.

“Where did that come from?” 

“I’m just wondering.”

“Yeah, I’ve had one serious girlfriend.”

“What happened with her?” I wanted to know. The reason they broke up would give me a lot of insight into how Brady operates as a boyfriend.

He looked off past me for a moment and I almost felt bad for asking him. Was that too personal? I didn’t want to pry or anything, I was just curious.

“She accepted a job in New York City. We tried the long distance thing for a little while, but it wasn’t coducive to a satisfying relationship.”

“So if she was still here, do you think y’all would still be together?”

“Hard to say.” Brady paused. “We are two completely different people now. That was almost two years ago so our lives and circumstances have considerably changed.”

I immediately wondered what the girl is like. She is probably a doctor or rocket scientist or something I will never be smart enough to do. She probably owns a condo, has $100,000 in retirement already and has her finances on lock because she doesn’t spend money on designer shoes, handbags and clothing. She’s probably super low maintanence. The thought of Brady with another girl actually hurt.

“I imagine you’ve had a ton of boyfriends,” he said.

“Hey!” I said, poking his bare chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you could have any guy you want. You’re probably constantly fighting them off.” 

I considered this. I’ve never had trouble getting guys or anything, but I do have trouble with relationships. I think I expect too much. And I’m also very needy emotionally. At least that’s what I’ve been told.

“I’ve dated around,” I said. “But only one serious relationship, like you.”

“Yeah? What’s the story there?”

I didn’t even want to get into it. “It just didn’t work out. We wanted different things.”

Different things = I tried to turn a player into a relationship guy.

Somehow we started making out. I can’t remember who initiated it – I think it was mutual. Unlike last time, I was (mostly) sober and it felt right to be kissing him at that moment. It was almost innocent for some reason – I knew things weren’t going to go further and I was okay with that. Plus we were both really tired.

We pulled apart and laid there for a moment then I turned so that my back was to him and I was the little spoon.

“Your hair smells really good,” Brady said. And then he brushed it aside and planted a light kiss on my neck. Y’all know how I feel about my neck – it sent a sexy chill down my spine. Brady draped an arm around my waist and we immediately fell asleep. 

When I woke up, Brady was still sleeping but facing away from me. Something about waking up next to a guy makes me so turned on. I wanted to flip him over and do naughty things to him.

Instead, I found my phone and texted Kendra. “I slept with Brady last night.”

She responded, “Of course. I’m not even surprised. Are you capable of not immediately having sex with a guy?”

I knew she would react like this and I couldn’t help grinning at her predictableness.

“For your information, we slept in the same bed but we didn’t do anything sexual. We just kissed.”

“I don’t believe you have that kind of willpower.”

“It’s true. I want to have sex with him eventually of course, but I think waiting until it feels right is best. I don’t want to rush in to anything.”

“Is this Reese I’m talking to?”

“Yes it’s me!”

“You sound so mature. I’m actually proud of you.”

“Thank you. I just realized that I actually like this guy. I don’t want to ruin it like I always do.”

I couldn’t even believe what I was typing. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m not into romance or sappiness. I wear my heart on my sleeve, but I’m really guarded with my emotions. I don’t usually share how I really feel which has been detrimental to my past relationships.

I laid there for a little while longer, pinning food on Pinterest. I was pinning something about quinoa when I felt Brady beginning to stir and wake up. He turned on his back and stretched.

“Morning,” he said.

Just as I was about to respond, the door flew open and Chris shouted, “Hey jackass, do you want to-”

He saw me laying in the bed and his eyes widened. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t even know you were still here, Reese.” He backed out and closed the door.

“I guess he didn’t want anything,” Brady said.

I smiled and shrugged.

“Did you sleep okay?” he asked. 

“Yeah. Your bed is so comfy. I could stay here all day,” I said.

“You’re certainly welcome to. I like to stay in bed as long as humanly possible on Sundays.”

“Me too,” I said. 

We laid there for a while, just talking. Then we got hungry and decided to go to the kitchen to find food. I had worn a dress over and didn’t want to change so I just wore his oversized t-shirt down to the kitchen. We poured bowls of Honey Nut Cheerios and sat at the dining room table eating. We lounged around for the rest of the day, watching tv and generally just being lazy. Chris told us he was going to meet up with Carly and I quickly texted her that Brady and I didn’t have sex because I knew Chris would tell her that I spent the night.

Brady finally took me home at 6:30. I didn’t want to go because I was enjoying being lazy with him, but I was excited to shower and put on my own clothes. Before I got out of the car, Brady said, “Do you want to get dinner this week?”

“Sure,” I said.

“Okay. Monday or Tuesday will likely work best for me,” he said.

“I’m glad you’re squeezing me into your packed schedule.”

“I’m going to be cutting it close, but I’m certain it will be worth it.”

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