Did everyone else assume Brady’s brother was going to be gangly and awkward with huge glasses and weird hair? I sure did.
On Friday evening, Brady was going to dinner with his brother, Hunter, but afterward we were all going out. I went to Kendra’s to hang out for a few hours, but also search her closet because I lost a pair of boots and I knew she stole them. I actually haven’t been to Kendra’s much since John moved in because all of his shit has taken over her little apartment. When Kendra first moved in, I helped her decorate and pick out furniture so she had the most adorable, Victorian inspired Old Town apartment. Now John’s freaking bike is in the living room and the place smells like oatmeal. I grabbed my boots (knew it) and got the hell out of there.
I packed an overnight bag and headed to Brady’s to get ready and to pregame. Imagine my surprise when Brady led me to the kitchen to meet his brother and a giant was standing there drinking a beer.
“Reese, this is Hunter,” Brady said introducing us.
His brother stuck out his paw for me to shake and said, “Nice to finally meet you, Reese. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
He just looked like his name was Hunter. Y’all are going to crucify me for saying this, but he is very, very good looking. He was at least 6’3 (probably taller) with a coarse, but maintained beard and his hair in a low man-bun type thing. He reminds me of Thor, but much more granola, like he wears Birkenstocks and lives in a camper. I shook his hand, which was easily three times larger than mine, and he gave me a knowing kind of smirk. Probably because he’s fully aware that I lied about being pregnant and made a fool of myself in front of their parents. Suddenly I felt really self-conscious.
“Hi,” I squeaked.
“Do you like whiskey?” Hunter asked.
“Um, it’s okay,” I replied. I like all alcohol (obvi), but whiskey definitely isn’t my go-to.
“I was telling Brady, I have this whiskey from the 19th century. It’s insane. It’s not even legal to own anymore,” he explained and a fifth of dark, dark whiskey materialized in his hand.
“How did you even get it on the plane?” I asked.
He glanced at me and smiled slyly before pouring three glasses.
“To a good night?” Hunter cheersed looking from Brady to me.
We were drinking the whiskey straight with no ice or anything and it burned. It had a licoricey flavor and it was really strong. I felt dizzy after only one sip. Whoa. Had to go easy on that stuff.
I took my drink to Brady’s room to get ready. I decided to wear jeans, a Derek Lam tank and booties with my hair down. After one glass of that old ass whiskey, I was already pretty turnt and dancing around the duplex.
We took a cab to the bar and met Carly and Chris there. Apparently I was the only one who was affected by Hunter’s tainted alcohol and I skipped to the bar to order us shots (jaeger bombs obviously). Even though I was being a little crazy, Brady didn’t ask me to calm down. Probably should have though.
The night started to get kinda blurry, but I remember talking a lot. I was standing at the bar with Brady telling him about the time I was so scared in a haunted house that I asked them to just kill me, when my mother called me. It’s like she has some sort of radar that lets her know when I’m belligerently drunk. I declined her call and she immediately called back.
“My mom’s blowing up my phone, she’s so fucking weird,” I told Brady.
“Perhaps it’s something important,” he said.
Just when he said that my mom texted me, “Call me babe. It’s important.”
Naturally I thought the worst like my dad was in a car accident or one of my grandparents was dead. I told Brady I was going to call her back and pushed my way outside to the fresh air. To my surprise, Hunter was standing at the curb next to a food cart.
“What’s up?” he greeted me.
I waved and dialed my mom back.
“Hey love,” she answered. “I have your Tory Burch wedges here. Do you mind if I borrow them tonight? I’m going to Flying Saucer with the girls.”
“Seriously, Mom? That’s what was so important?” I practically yelled. “I don’t even wear Tory Burch anymore!”
“So you don’t mind?”
I was so irritated at her for making me panic and think something was wrong at home. Plus she borrows my things without asking all the time so I don’t know why she was suddenly acting like she needs permission.
“Bye Mom! Love you,” I said and hung up.
“My mom is nuts,” I said to Hunter, just in case he was wondering. “What are you doing out here?”
“Aren’t I allowed to enjoy this beautiful weather?”
This was sarcasm because it was really chilly and windy as hell. We started talking about how he lives in San Francisco which has nice weather, but not nearly as nice as like SoCal. We somehow got to talking about Brady and me and I bravely asked what Brady has told him about me. I was preparing for the worst (I caused drama, I was an alcoholic, I corrupted him), but to my surprise Hunter said, “He told me that he’s in love with you.”
I was not expecting him to say that at all and I probably looked like I swallowed a goldfish.
“I know, I was surprised too,” Hunter said. “He’s so private about that kind of stuff. I only knew about the last girl he dated because my parents told me.”
The last girl he dated. Anna or whoever?
“I think he was just a little bit freaked out,” he continued.
Hunter’s confession actually freaked me out. I know Brady and I have said that when we’re high, but I didn’t think he really felt that way. Even though I was drunk, I got embarrassed and felt weird that Hunter told me that. If Brady wanted me to know, he would express it – sober.
“Do you have a girlfriend?” I asked Hunter to take the attention off me.
He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and lit one.
“There’s a girl. Dom – Dominique. She’s the love of my life,” Hunter said. “I haven’t told anyone about her though.”
“Why haven’t you told anyone?” I wanted to know.
“I don’t want to give my family the chance to disapprove of her. We’re going to elope.” Hunter offered the cigarette to me and I took it.
“Why would anyone disapprove?” I asked.
“Why wouldn’t they? Generally speaking, my parents just…suck.”
I nodded, taking a drag. I don’t know them well, but I could see how his parents would disapprove of his whole San Francisco life. But from what Brady told me, I assumed he and their mom were close. “When are you getting married?”
“Soon. Don’t tell Brady.”
I told him that his secret is safe with me. We passed the cig back and forth a few times until it was gone. I knew Brady was probably looking for me so I left Hunter out there and went back inside. I found Brady exactly where I’d left him by the bar. I threw my arms around and kissed him because 1. I was drunk and 2. We are in love!
“Is everything okay with your mom?” he asked.
“Yeah, she’s just annoying,” I said dismissively.
Brady said that I smelled like smoke and I quickly (probably too quickly) told him that a guy next to me outside was smoking. Which isn’t a lie. We hung out and drank for a little while longer before getting food from a food truck (barf) and cabbing home.
I woke up on Saturday morning and made everyone hot chocolate with Baileys because it was freezing. Brady and Hunter were sitting at the dining room table talking and at first I just sat there browsing Instagram until I heard them say something about Ebola being in the United States.
“Wait, what’s Ebola?” I asked. I’d heard people talking about it in passing, but I thought it only affected people in Africa or whatever.
“It’s a deadly virus that is spread through bodily fluids. Your kidneys and liver shut down and you bleed from every orifice in your body,” Brady said. “A man recently traveled to Liberia and contracted it.”
“He lied about being in contact with anyone with Ebola and brought it back with him. Now he’s being quarantined, but they didn’t diagnose him at first. They gave him antibiotics and sent him home,” Hunter added.
“Imagine how many hundreds of people he could’ve infected within that time. They’re also trying to hunt down everyone who was on the plane with him and contain them.”
“They decontaminated his apartment and sent his family to a confidential location, but he could have spread it to them already.”
“It could be all over the country by now.”
I was horrified. They laughed and said they were kidding and the media is probably making it sound much worse than it actually is, but I spent the next few hours cleaning Brady’s condo
and staying holed up in his room because you just never fucking know. Eventually they said they were going to go eat at one of my favorite restaurants so I couldn’t say no.
I used almost all of my purse sized bottle of Purell. Then I started thinking that the cooks or our waiter could have contacted someone with Ebola and they could have it and could’ve contaminated our food. I told Brady and Hunter and they laughed and kept eating, but my appetite was gone. It was really unfortunate too because my bacon cheeseburger was bomb AF.
When we got home, Chris was home and they all went downstairs to smoke. After my tiring day of trying not to catch Ebola, I needed to take the edge off so I joined them. I only choked once and when we were done, we sat on the couch for a really long time. They were talking about football or sports or something while I sat there mesmerized by the fact that my nude painted nails matched the wall almost perfectly. What are the chances?
We decided to go to the bar and all got up to get ready. While Brady and I were getting dressed, Hunter showered in the attached bathroom. We were basically done getting ready so while we waited for Hunter to shower we started making out and fooling around. Naturally, we ended up having sex, but without taking any of our clothes off. Every time I would moan or make any noise Brady would shush me so Hunter wouldn’t hear even though the shower was on. I doubt he would’ve heard anything.
The four of us walked to a nearby bar and started with shots and beer. I felt like one of the guys.
Once when Brady went to get more drinks, Hunter leaned over to me and said, “You’re not what I expected at all. You’re super chill.”
“What were you expecting?” I asked.
He looked over his shoulder like he was making sure Brady wasn’t coming back yet. “A snob. No offense.”
I’ve actually been called a snob (so 90’s right?) plenty of times in my life so it felt nice to hear that someone didn’t think I was one.
When we got home, Brady and I got in bed. I wasn’t really drunk and the weed seemed to have worn off, but I was still feeling bold.
“Do you love me?” I asked.
“Mmmhm,” he murmured, pulling me close.
I pushed him away so I could look at his face. “Seriously?”
His eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. “What?”
“Have you ever been in love? Do you even know what it feels like?”
“Why are you asking me this?”
“I just want to know!”
“Yes, I know what love feels like,” Brady sighed like he was so annoyed with me.
“How?” I demanded.
“What do you mean how?” he asked.
“Who have you ever been in love with?”
“A girl a few years ago-”
I didn’t even let him finish before saying, “How do you know you loved her?”
“Because I knew. She did a lot for me.”
I hated hearing about other girls Brady’s been with so even though I was dying to know who this girl was (Anna? Someone else?) I decided not to pry anymore.
We fell asleep and then something really weird happened in the middle of the night. I legitimately can’t tell if this was a dream or if this really happened, but I’ll tell it like it really happened.
I woke up in the middle of the night because I heard someone in the bathroom. I assumed it was Brady at first, but then I felt him sleeping next to me. I heard the toilet flush and watched the door open. Hunter was standing there, completely naked with his hair down and his dick just swinging. He saw me and smirked then turned off the bathroom light and walked out. So fucking weird/realistic.
But on Sunday morning we all had breakfast and Hunter didn’t blush or act weird (I personally felt really embarrassed) so now I’m thinking I must have dreamed the whole thing. Plus, why would Hunter be walking around Brady and Chris’s place naked like he owns the place? It can’t have really happened. Which begs the question of ew, why would I have that kind of dream?