have i let myself go?

Since the trip to NYC was so last minute, I waited until the last minute to pack. I only packed my interview outfit, travel outfit and of course my entire makeup collection because I wasn’t sure what look I wanted to go for. Brady drove me to the airport and on the plane, I practiced some interview questions/worked on my Pinterest wedding/drank martinis. 

By the time I got to New York and checked into my hotel it was after midnight and I was exhausted. My interview was at 8:00 AM so I quickly showered and then fell sleep right away. 

I set my alarm for 6:00 on Saturday morning so I would have an hour to get ready and an hour to get to my interview. When my alarm went off, I seriously considered snoozing until 8:00 then skipping my interview and exploring the city for a few hours. It’s not like I’m dying for a new job anyway. I could tell Kate that I missed my flight and never made it to NYC, but thanks for the opportunity.

But I’m working on being a more responsible adult so I rolled out of bed, got dressed with my eyes closed and swiped on mascara and concealer. I was out the door by 6:50 so I had time to grab breakfast and a latte. Luckily, Kate was nice enough to book my hotel not far from the building where the headquarters are located and I was able to make it there walking, in less than thirty minutes.

The interview itself was pretty painless. I met with the vp of sales and the director of stores – two girls in their early 30s. One was tall and had on a very New York City outfit: black tights, oversized black tunic, steep black booties and eyeliner. The other woman was tiny and Asian and was the exact opposite of the first woman. She looked like an Easter basket with all her bright colors and jewelry. They asked me a bunch of behavior based questions which I’m super good at. As you guys may or may not know, I’m really good at telling stories. 

The taller woman was trying really hard to be intimidating and refused to smile or acknowledge my answers. The Asian girl was really nice though. After the interview, they took me on a tour of the office and I got to see the design suite and the little test store they use to plan the floorplan for all the other stores. It was all really cool. Then they started telling me about past sales directors who had since been promoted to cool jobs like the new store opening coordinator who travels opening the new stores and buyer who decides what things each store sells. And if you do get promoted they will fund your move to NYC. This got me excited. I could finally fulfill my dream of living in New York! The taller girl even said she used to be a sales director and just worked her way up. You would think that would make her more humble, but I guess not. 

As we were wrapping everything up, the Asian girl said, “It was so nice meeting you, Reese. I think you would be a great fit for our brand.”

I beamed. After visiting the headquarters and talking to them about the possibilities for growth, I could really see myself working for the company. They are so much more in touch with current fashion trends and technology. As much as I try to get my company more on trend, Dave and Diana like to stick to what they know – which is muted colors and bland silhouettes. They don’t even understand why we need an iPhone app.

But then the taller girl decided to piss on my parade. “If we decide to move forward with you, you’ll be contacted by Kate. If not, thanks for your time.”

Bitch.

After the interview I had to run back to the hotel and book it to the airport to make my flight home. I really wished I had time to explore especially because there were so many cute boutiques on the way to my hotel.

I slept the entire flight home and Brady was waiting for me at the airport. It was like back to reality.

“How did it go?” Brady asked on the way home.

“Fine,” I sighed. “One of the interviewers was kind of a bitch so I probably won’t get it.”

He told me not to think negatively and he thinks I probably will get an offer, etc. I didn’t want to tell him how much I was actually hoping for an offer so that way if one didn’t come, I could pretend I didn’t care. 

But whatever. All I really wanted to do was eat and have sex with my boyfriend. We stopped and got food then took it to Brady’s to eat. I asked him what he did Friday night and he told me that he and Chris “stayed home.”

After we ate, I forced Brady into his room and had my way with him. Not that it took much. After that I made Brady come with me shopping. He’s never been shopping with me and I think being a good shopping partner is  a vital relationship requirement. I need a man who will be involved, but not too involved, who will endorse all of my purchases, who will not try to make sense of my shopping strategy and most importantly, who will carry my shopping bags and/or purse.

By the time we made it to Nordy’s, I had accumulated four bags and Brady suggested we stop and put them in the car. I spun around; giving him a pitying smile. What a newb. 

“We can’t drop anything off yet,” I explained, gently. “I might need to match things before I buy them so we have to keep it all with us.”

Brady gave me a weird look, but said okay. I did a quick lap around Nordstrom and picked up a pair of booties, a scarf, a pair of sunglasses, a watch and a dress that I’ll probably return.

After we left Nordstrom, the annual lights parade was happening and I insisted we stay and watch it because sometimes I’m a child. It ended soon after that so I missed the majority of it.

There was a really happy atmosphere in the city on Saturday evening. I don’t know if it was from the parade or all the tourists visiting or the fact that it wasn’t blisteringly cold, but I texted all my friends and insisted we get dressed up and go to the club.

Carly and Kendra came over to pregame and I decided to wear a black dress, So Kates, and red lipstick. We took Uber to the club and Brady and Chris met us there.

When Brady saw me he said, “Wow, you look really beautiful.”

Lol, what a nerd. I feel like he hardly ever compliments me anymore so I took it. Maybe I’ve let myself go since getting in a relationship. Doesn’t that happen to people?

Somehow I got us a complimentary table in VIP by talking to a bartender and the manager told us to order whatever we wanted. Don’t mind if I do. I ordered us a bottle of rosé and bottles of top shelf tequila and vodka.

I told myself that I wasn’t going to get drunk, but I got drunk. Kendra and Carly did too so we ran around and danced. There’s just nothing like drinking on someone else’s tab. While we were down on the main dance floor, we ran into Derrick and another one of our friends from college, Ronnie.

I momentarily forgot about the falling out Derrick and I had and ran over to them and pulled them into hugs.

“Oh my God, Ronnie!” I screamed, using my Sammi Sweetheart accent.

Ronnie used to have house parties almost every single night in college. He was friends with me and also my ex and we would have so many drunk heart to hearts. He was the number one supporter of our relationship. 

“Reese! We were just talking about you!” Ronnie said.

“What did you say?” I asked, glaring at Derrick. 

“I was thinking about texting you and asking you to come out tonight,” Ronnie said. “But you’re here anyway so it worked out.”

I smiled and invited them to our table. On the way there, Derrick fell into step next to me and said, “How have you been?”

I can’t lie, I was impressed that even after the falling out we had, he was still being nice and cordial.

We got to our table and I introduced everyone to Ronnie. I ordered us another bottle meanwhile hoping that “order whatever you want” meant that it was on the house. I never actually clarified that with the manager.

We all sat down and I leaned over to Ronnie to catch up. He lives in LA now and was just visiting Chicago for the weekend. I’m actually kind of offended that he didn’t text me and let me know beforehand because I thought we were friends. But whatever.

We were having a pleasant conversation and then Ronnie said, “You know, [ex whose name I refuse to say, type, or think] has been asking about you lately. He misses you.”

My blood stopped pumping and I’m sure my entire face went white. “What?”

“We see each other two or three times a week because our offices are a block from each other. Don’t you want to talk to him?” Ronnie continued.

I started to say, “Why would I want to talk to him?” but I only got to “Why-” before I started sobbing.

Brady was sitting on the other side of me and immediately put his arm around me and asked what was wrong. When I didn’t answer, he looked at Ronnie and said, “What did you do to her?”

I heard Derrick say, “She’s fine. She’s drunk. She cries about everything when she’s drunk.”

True.

“What did I do?” Ronnie asked, sounding genuinely confused. Poor guy.

“Nothing. She’s being dramatic,” Derrick said.

“Fuck off,” Brady said and my head jerked toward him, shocked. Brady is usually so laidback and non-confrontational.

“It’s fine,” I sniffled, trying to smooth over the situation. I looked around for Kendra and Carly. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

I stood up and grabbed them then forced them to go the bathroom with me. They both started touching up their makeup and hair while I explained to them what Ronnie said.

“Do you think he really misses me?” I asked.

Kendra spun around, slapping Carly in the face with her weave. “Who gives a fuck if he misses you? That piece of trash deserves to be single and miserable forever.”

My eyes grew wide. 

“Seriously, fuck him. I can’t believe you’re even pretending to care. You have an amazing boyfriend who is in love with you.”

I felt more tears forming. Kendra was totally right. Why was I even entertaining the fact that [redacted] claims he misses me? He’s probably just lonely.

I cleaned myself up then skipped back out there. I couldn’t wait to hug my boyfriend and plan our drunk future.

“Hi baaaabe,” I squealed, jumping on Brady’s lap. I planted a kiss on him, leaving my lipstick all over his lips. It was cute.

“You okay?” he asked.

“So I’ve been thinking,” I said excitedly. “I wouldn’t mind moving to Massachusetts. It seems peaceful.”

“Really?”

Brady seemed happy that I am willing to settle down with him in Massachusetts and we were right in the middle of designing our peaceful little cabin in the woods when Ronnie appeared in front of us.

“It was good seeing you, Reese,” he said. “Maybe we can catch up tomorrow or something.” And then he looked at Brady for approval like he’s some sort of controlling boyfriend. Lol! 

I didn’t end up meeting Ronnie before he went home, but I did text him apologizing for my tantrum (if that’s what you want to call it) and assured him that it wasn’t his fault. If anyone kind of understands, it’s Ronnie. He was there for the entire fucked up relationship.

On Monday night, Kate called me.

“Hey, love,” she said in her super cute accent. “How did your interview go?”

“I don’t know,” I said, honestly. “I left feeling really indifferent.”

“They loved you,” she revealed.

“Really?” I asked, surprised. “Even the tall girl?”

“They both did. Josie [the Asian girl] raved about you all day and asked where I found you. Honestly, I think you got it.”

Wow. Even though an offer hadn’t been officially made, I was already feeling nauseous at the thought of having to decide if I was going to take it.

“I know you’re probably so sick of interviews, but there’s one more person I want you to meet,” Kate said.

She explained that she wanted me to meet with the guy who would be my immediate boss. He is in charge of the region I would be taking over and another region. Kate said that it wouldn’t really be a formal interview, but just kind of a casual meeting to make sure that we are on the same wavelength since we would be working together. He will be in Chicago on Friday and she said she gave him my number so he is going to call me to set up a time and place.

After I hung up with Kate, I called my mom. I hadn’t told her about the possible new job at all, but now that an offer might be in the cards, I wanted to know what she thought.

She answered the phone and proceeded to tell me that one of her friends showed her pictures of me on Facebook from over the weekend and she wanted to know how I got my hair like it was. So I had to explain to her that I used a curling wand and that she actually has a curling wand at home that she never uses. My mom is so exhausting. 

Finally, I explained to her the job situation and asked her what I should do.

“If they offer you more money, take it!” she said without missing a beat.

“What about my current job? And Diana?” I asked.

“Oh babe, Diana doesn’t expect you to be there forever. You’re young. This is the time where you can hop from job to job until you find something you like. I had thirty jobs when I was in college.”

“Mom, I’m not in college. I can’t just job hop. And I like my job. That’s the problem. Should I risk leaving the job I like for a job I only think I would like better?”

“I don’t think you should pass up an opportunity like this,” my mom said.

Then she started complaining about how my dad has been spending a lot of time at work lately and in fact, he wasn’t even home yet. Then he came home and she hung up.

So I guess I’ll just meet with the guy on Friday and see what happens. I figured when they wanted to fly me to New York that I probably already had it, but still. You never know.

My parents haven’t mentioned coming for Thanksgiving any more so I’m not counting on it. Everyone is going to be here in the city for the holiday so we’re going to have a big Friendsgiving feast at Brady and Chris’s. Kendra is going to do most of the cooking obviously, but Carly and I will help.

I hope y’all have a happy Thanksgiving! ❤

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i’ll kill him.

I finally decided to just bite the bullet and get my car fixed so I dropped it off on Monday. They gave me a loaner car while my car is being worked on which probably isn’t the best idea on their part. Not complaining though.

After I dropped my car off I invited myself to Brady’s. I was so excited to see him and to see how his trip was. Brady opened the door (when is he just going to give me a key?) and pulled me into a hug.

“I missed you,” I said, hugging him. 

“Me too,” he replied. He kissed me hard and then led me into the house. We went to the kitchen and got water then he sat down in front of his laptop in the dining room. Ugh.

“So how was your trip?” I asked, trying to hide my annoyance. We hadn’t seen each other in like three days, but he was completely engrossed in his stupid computer.

“I had a very good time. I haven’t visited Hunter in a while so I enjoyed seeing where he lives and meeting all his friends,” Brady said. 

“Who did you meet?” My eyes lit up. I thought of the girl Hunter said he would be marrying, Dumb or whoever.

Brady looked up from the laptop at me. “I can’t remember. A bunch of guys.”

Oh. He totally thought I was being a jealous, psycho girlfriend and I wasn’t (this time.) I made him elaborate on the trip and he told me about the game and how they bar hopped and smoked hookah and etc. Typical shit. 

I excitedly let him know that I “ran into” Jessica on Saturday night and he said, “I heard.”

Are you fucking kidding me? It’s one thing for her to brag about them talking, but now he was too? Cool. I decided to let this slide and dragged him to his room. We got undressed and I proceeded to fuck his brains out then fall asleep.

On Tuesday I was pretty busy working on projects at work, but I took a break midday to eat. Whitney and a gay guy from the ad team named Danny were standing at the sink talking, but stopped when I walked in.

“Hey Reese! I love your shoes! You always have the best shoes,” Whitney said, all syrupy sweet.

I smiled and said, “Thanks!”

Lately, Whitney and I have been getting along fine. She kind of does her own thing and I do mine and when we talk it’s pure business. She’s definitely more into the digital side of branding so it actually works out.

Whitney walked out and I said, “I don’t know why she’s being so nice lately.”

Danny shrugged and said, matter-of-factly, “Probably because she feels guilty about talking so much shit about you.”

My eyes narrowed. I knew I shouldn’t care or ask what she said, but I had to know. “What did she say?”

“A lot of stuff. She wants your job. She said you’re lazy and you’re going to get fired because you never do anything.”

Excuse me?

“And the only reason you didn’t get fired for supposedly hooking up with that BJ kid is because your mom is friends with Diana.”

That actually really pissed me off. First of all, I am not lazy. Of course I have my lazy days (we all do), but I’ve done so much for my company. I think I deserve a lazy day every once in a while. Secondly, I thought the whole BJ thing was behind us. Why is she bringing that up? I’ve moved on. Whatever.

I rolled my eyes and told Danny that I didn’t care even though I wanted to go immediately confront Whitney. I knew that wasn’t the smartest idea so I avoided her for the rest of the day.

After work, I went home and showered to get ready to go to a bar and grill with Brady and Chris because apparently there was some sort of game on. I told Brady about Whitney and her comments and of course, he took her side and said that being in a position of power, I shouldn’t ever let anyone see me being lazy. He doesn’t understand. Even when I’m being lazy, I’m doing work like replying to emails or getting on Pinterest for inspiration.

Whatever. I was sick of this conversation so I grabbed Brady’s hand under the table and pulled it into my lap. He looked at me kind of confused at first and then smiled when I slid his hand under my dress. He started rubbing my pussy and I bit my lip trying not to make any noise.

Our server came back and Brady quickly removed his hand and ordered us another beer. Ugh. He’s so not daring sometimes. We barely made it through another inning before we wanted to go back to his place to have sex.

On Wednesday I had some meetings outside of the office so luckily I didn’t really have to be around Whitney. I stayed in the office until 6:30 and I was supposed to meet Kendra for happy hour at 7:00. As I was packing up and getting ready to leave, she called me. 

“I’m leaving right now. It’s only 6:30 you psycho,” I answered, thinking she was calling to see where I was. 

“Can you come over here right now?” she asked, her voice shaky.

“Are you okay? Where are you?” I asked, concerned.

“I’m at home. Just please come over here,” she sniffled. She was clearly upset and crying.

“I’ll be there in a minute,” I promised and hung up. Naturally, I thought the worst like she had poked her eyeball out with her mascara or accidentally burned all her hair off with her straightener so I sped over. 

Kendra answered the door still wearing her work suit, but her face was wet and streaky with tears. 

“Ken, what’s wrong?” I asked automatically pulling her into a hug. I’ve only ever seen Kendra cry a handful of times and most recently it was because her grandfather died.

She hugged me back and then led me to the small living room without a word. Kendra sank into the couch and started bawling.

“Kendra, what’s wrong?” I asked, my concern growing. This was not like her at all.

She waited a few moments before sobbing, “John cheated on me in San Francisco.”

Wait, what?

“What? How do you know?” I gasped.

“I found a receipt. He bought condoms at a CVS on Saturday night. I confronted him and he admitted to having a one night stand. He fucked some random girl!”

Oh my God.

“Apparently they met at a bar and she invited him back to her place. He said he was really drunk, but that is hardly an excuse.”

You guys, John is the nerdiest guy ever. I find it very hard to believe that he could even flirt with a random girl enough for her to invite him home. And how dare John cheat on gorgeous, successful lawyer Kendra? She has always been too good for him. She made him everything he is today. Kendra literally gave him a chance (when she shouldn’t have) when he was obsessed and in love with her. After she let him move into her beautiful apartment and he ruined it with his bike and smelly belongings, he had the nerve to fucking cheat on her?

“I’ll kill him,” I said and I meant it.

Kendra started crying again and I hugged her hard. As much as we butt heads, Kendra is my best friend in the entire world and I will do anything to protect her.

“I can’t believe this. I didn’t think John was capable of doing anything like this,” I thought out loud. 

“I didn’t either. I trusted him so much, Reese. I never thought I would have to worry about him cheating.”

John cheating on Kendra just shows that you can’t trust a guy just because he’s fucking lame. Like do all guys cheat?

“So where is he now?”

“He had to go back to work, but I told him he can’t come back here. I’m going to throw all his stuff in trash bags and leaving it outside.”

I couldn’t help kind of smirking at the thought of a bunch of trash bags sitting outside her gorgeous apartment.

“Kendra, I can’t fucking believe him. Did Brady and Chris know what happened?” I said. 

“They did. They met the girl and everything.” 

Wait so Brady knew John had sex with some random girl and failed to tell me that when I asked about his trip? Why wouldn’t he tell me? Does he have a secret about the trip too?

I let Kendra cry on my shoulder for the next few hours. I told her what an asshat I think John is and eventually she asked me to stop. And then she asked me to leave because she needed to be alone to bag up his shit. I told her that I thought I should stay and she insisted I leave. Which was rude, but I’ll overlook it. I needed to confront Brady anyway.

I called him and told him I was coming over. Brady answered the door and we hugged and kissed and he tried to walk back to the dining room, but I grabbed his hand. I pushed him onto the couch and straddled him. Brady smirked up at me, clearly into my little domineering act. I put my arms around his neck and kissed him making my way down to his throat. I could feel between my legs that he was getting excited and I can’t lie, I was to. But I was here on a mission.

I grabbed the top of his hair where it’s grown out a bit and yanked hard so that he was looking directly up at me. “Why didn’t you tell me John cheated on Kendra in San Francisco?”

Brady’s body kind of deflated and he looked down guiltily. He didn’t say anything for several seconds so I said, “Huh?”

“He asked me not to tell you. He wanted to tell Kendra on his own accord and I didn’t want to strip him of that opportunity. He knew you would tell her,” Brady said.

“Of course I would tell her! She’s my best fucking friend. Why would you choose John over me?”

Brady started to say, “He asked me-”

But I shouted, “Your loyalty is to me, not John! You wouldn’t even know him if it wasn’t for me.”

“I know. I just didn’t want you or me to get involved in their relationship. He deserved the right to tell her himself.”

“Do you know she found out because she found a condom receipt? That asshole wasn’t going to tell her!”

Brady didn’t say anything and I couldn’t help asking, “Did you hook up with someone too?”

He looked up at me, stunned. “Of course not. I can’t believe you would even ask me that.”

“You never know. Kendra didn’t think John would ever be capable of hooking up with someone else either.” I climbed off Brady’s lap and grabbed my bag to head to his room.

He continued sitting on the couch, looking at me. I shrugged and headed to his room to get ready for bed. Brady didn’t join me right away so I sent a really sweet text to Kendra letting her know that she’s beautiful and amazing and John sucks and etc. and that I was here for absolutely anything.

Brady finally came in his room and turned off the light and got in bed next to me. I grabbed his neck and started kissing him and he kissed me back for a few minutes before pulling away.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about John,” he started.

I rolled my eyes.

“I understand that you think it was your right to know, but things aren’t always all about you.”

I started to say that it was my right to know, but Brady put a hand on the side of my face/in my hair and I knew he was about to say something life changing/important.

“I…love you,” he said.

My heart jumped up to my throat and I actually thought I was going to vomit. But not because I was grossed out or anything. Brady saying he loved me – completely sober and looking at me in the eye – was almost too much. But I felt it. I closed my eyes because I couldn’t handle all the love and eye contact.

“I love you too,” I said not looking at him.

We kissed and fell asleep without having sex or anything. Just so you guys know, the only other guy I thought I was in love with was my college ex. And I found out that that wasn’t love at all, it was totally lust. So I’m not even sure what love feels like. (I haven’t even told Kendra that I don’t know if I’ve ever been in love because she would just lecture me.)

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what a fail.

On Tuesday I decided that I was going to make dinner for Brady. I don’t ever cook, but I thought it would be a nice gesture. I found a recipe for homemade ravioli on Pinterest that didn’t seem too complicated and made a grocery list for after work.

$170 later, I headed home with all the ingredients I needed (including a pastry wheel, a rolling pin, and a bottle of wine). I started with the pasta dough which seemed fairly easy – pour the flour on a flat surface, make a “well” for the egg yolks, oil and milk, mix.

Well, it didn’t work out like that. I didn’t want to touch the raw eggs with my bare hands so I tried to use a spoon. That obviously didn’t work. My dough came out super runny. I added more flour but it ended up crumbling into pieces. I tried again and decided that I would follow the recipe exactly by using my hands. I sucked it up and mixed the dough with my hands, but again it came out runny (later found out that I read the recipe wrong and should’ve added more flour, of course).

At this point, I was annoyed and decided I would start on the filling then come back to the dough. I was making a spinach and mozzarella filling and the first step was to wilt the spinach down with olive oil and garlic. Easy enough. I added the garlic and olive oil and then dumped the entire bag of spinach in the pan. My mom called and I excitedly told her about the meal I was making. I knew she would be proud.

She started telling me about how one of my favorite teachers from high school is under investigation for having sex with one of his students. I was shocked and realized that could have so easily been me. I flirted with him endlessly my junior and senior years because he was hot plus math was really hard. He never really budged or showed any interest (except buying a ton of cookie dough from me during our fundraiser for new uniforms). Maybe I just wasn’t hot enough for him to hook up with.

I was so engrossed in the conversation with my mom that I forgot all about the spinach on the stove until I smelled burning garlic. The pan was smoking so I told my mom I had to call her back. The majority of the spinach was black and burned with the garlic. How does that even happen?

By then, Brady was due in thirty minutes and my ravioli was nowhere near being done. What a fail. I knew that I had to cook something so I decided to stick with what a know how to make: grilled cheese. Plus that was all I really had time for. I had fresh mozzarella left from my ravioli disaster so I used it to make two sandwiches. I plated them with vintage Hermès plates with a basil leaf garnish. Chicest grilled cheese ever.

I buzzed Brady in and the first thing he said was, “Did you burn something?”

Ugh. Definitely should’ve opened a window.

“Are you ready to eat?” I asked, ignoring his question.

“Mmm, yes. What did you make?” Brady said.

I led him to my tiny table and chairs. “Gourmet grilled cheese!” I squealed.

“Looks great.” Brady went to sit down, but I yelled for him to stop.

“I need to take a picture for Instagram,” I explained.

He waited patiently while I uploaded the photo of our food and wine (and my fabulously decorated table) with the caption “Made dinner for bae.” I immediately got several likes.

After we ate, we were still hungry so we made pizza rolls. I poured us more wine and we took it along with our pizza rolls and Oreos to the couch. We started watching some baseball game and stayed up talking until 1:00 AM. 

On Wednesday, I hung out with Preston and Dillon. We went to this natural tea place Preston has been dying to try and all their drinks are named stuff like “Happiness” and “Purity.” I got “Tranquility” because obviously that’s what I need in my life.

We sat outside and I told them about my latest bout of craziness with Brady. Preston obviously laughed for several minutes then gave Dillon a brief overview of my relationship with Brady.

“Poor guy. He has no idea what he’s gotten himself into,” Preston said, wiping his laughter tears away.

“I’ve decided that I’m going to let myself be vulnerable though. I think I’ve been so crazy with him because I have a guard up,” I said.

“Good for you,” Preston said and his face turned serious. “I don’t think he has any intention to hurt you, love bug. And if he does, just know that you have amazing friends who will help you slash his tires and hack into his Facebook.”

I laughed because that was true. You don’t even want to know what kind of trouble my friends and I got into in college.

Dillon spent the rest of the evening telling me his life story which would have been really annoying if it wasn’t completely entertaining. He said he’s 19 and moved here from San Diego. His house burned down two years ago and apparently his family’s insurance didn’t cover all the losses so they had to dip into his college fund and now he has no money to go to school. So tragic. He’s hoping to break into acting and dance and has been an extra in those awful Step Up movies. He moved to Chicago because of the theater opportunities and was homeless for his first few months here. Luckily he met a kind person who not only helped him pay for school, but also gave him a place to live. What a wonderful story.

I texted Brady while I was out and asked if he wanted to come over. He said he was working late so I invited Preston and Dillon over. I couldn’t help checking Jessica’s Facebook to see if she checked in anywhere or tagged Brady in anything. She didn’t. Is it unhealthy that I do that? I’ve been checking her page obsessively the last few days and all I see are pictures of her and her friends. I thought about deleting her, but then I won’t catch it if she does tag Brady in something.

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ice.

Kendra showed up to happy hour late with John in tow on Wednesday and I was really annoyed. Happy hour is our chance to talk about guys, not hang out with them. The three of us got tapas and beer and started talking. Well, the two of them did. They started talking about people I don’t know so I pretended to be listening for a little while then I pulled out my phone and started texting. I decided that since apparently we were inviting our men to happy hour I was going to invite Brady too. He said that he was wrapping up a few last minute things but he would be there in thirty to forty five minutes. I love how accessible he is sometimes.

Just when I was considering gouging my eyes out with a fork, Brady showed up. I squealed and threw my arms around him when he showed up next to our table. We had just seen each other the day before, but whatever.

“Hi Brady,” Kendra said as he sat down.

It occurred to me that Kendra and Brady actually haven’t had much interaction except drunken bar nights.

Brady ordered a beer and we all started talking. Brady and John started talking about their jobs since they both work in hospitals. They were off in their own little world and I couldn’t break Brady away. I wanted to tell him how well a meeting went at work, but whenever I tried to pull him away from his new boyfriend, he would turn and smile and pat my knee like I’m some sort of impatient child.

Finally I excused myself to go to the restroom and dragged Kendra with me.

“Why is your boyfriend moving in on my boyfriend?” I demanded.

“I don’t know. I think they’re getting along nicely,” she said, reapplying her red lipstick.

“Well, it’s super inconsiderate that John is talking his ear off and I haven’t even had a chance to tell him about my day,” I said.

“Honestly, you should be happy they are getting along and you can bring Brady around your friends. We can do triple dates with Carly and Chris!” she enthused.

I narrowed my eyes at her. “I don’t want to do triple dates with y’all. I’m an adult.”

“You’re such a fucking brat, Reese,” she said and walked out of the bathroom.

The evening went on and Brady and John became instant BFFs. I was irritated, but I did enjoy seeing Brady talk to someone who is on his same wavelength and can talk with him about glucosamine and the metabolization of alcohol. It was pretty cute hearing him talk like that.

After happy hour, Brady came over. I dug out my pack of birthday cake Oreos and we sat on the couch eating them and watching Teen Mom 2. I finally got a chance to tell Brady about the exciting meeting and what I’ve been doing at work.

“I really like how passionate you are about your work,” he said. 

When he said that I realized that work is the only thing I am really passionate about. Well that and drinking. Brady is passionate about his work too, but he also likes to run (he told me he’s running a marathon in a few months. Didn’t invite me though, surprise!), and travel to other countries to help people, and other things that make him an all around good person. I really need to get some hobbies.

On Thursday, I had a meeting with a watercolor artist who I found on Pinterest/Etsy. I thought her paintings would be super cute in thick white frames and also printed on pillows. The girl was kind of greasy and smelled odd and was only interested in how much money she could make. I mean, I get it, but it just kind of left a bad taste in my mouth.

After work, I went to Brady’s. Can you believe I’m not tired of him yet? We’ve hung out everyday for the past few weeks. I’m pretty sure this is some kind of record. Chris was at work so Brady and I made drinks (ice, tequila, splash of Sprite, lime) and watched a movie in the basement. Brady made us each another cup after we finished and at that point I was pretty tipsy. We decided to play a drinking card game with our new drinks and as you can probably expect, I lost badly.

“Fuck this game,” I said, swiping the table so all the cards went flying.

Brady smirked at me with low eyes. “Poor sport.”

I flicked him off and went to the wet bar to make another drink.

“Get better at card games then you won’t have to worry about losing,” he called from the couch.

I tossed a piece of ice at him and hit him right in the back of the head. Before I could celebrate my victory, Brady was up and barreling toward me. I screamed and ran, but he caught me by my shirt and yanked me back. He pushed me against the granite counter so my back was to him.

“You want to play with ice, huh?” he taunted. 

I felt a cold ice cube on the middle of my back and I shrieked. Brady ran it up my spine and stopped at the back of my neck. I was shivering and squealing involuntarily and trying to slip away, but Brady had me pinned with his body.

“Let me go,” I whined just as he rolled the ice cube down my lower back.

“What? You are the one who wanted to do this,” he said innocently.

I reached behind me to try to claw him away, but Brady grabbed my wrist hard and slammed it back on the counter. He leaned down and kissed my neck really softly despite him trying to break my wrist just seconds before.

I let out some sort of moan/grunt and realized I was really, really turned on. I love aggressive Drunk Brady.

“Are you going to apologize?” he asked. 

I didn’t know if apologizing would make it stop and I didn’t know if I even wanted it to so I didn’t say anything.

Brady put another cold cube on the back of my neck and kept it in the same spot until it started to drip down and make me numb. He leaned down and licked the dripping water up and started sucking my neck. He pushed his hips into me so I could feel his boner. Literally almost orgasmed right there.

“Just say you’re sorry, Reese,” he said in my ear as he ran another ice cube down my back. 

Between his weight pushing me against the counter, the sensation of the cold ice cube and the fact that I was so turned on, I couldn’t seem to catch my breath.

When I didn’t say anything, Brady pulled my shorts down and put an ice cube on my butt cheek. I couldn’t help giggling.

“I’m…sorry,” I finally gasped.

“Are you?”

I heard his belt and then he rammed into me and started thrusting hard, a lot harder than usual, but I liked it. He grabbed a fistful of my hair with one hand and used the other to steady my hip while he plowed into me. Brady was going so much harder than usual like he was genuinely mad at me for throwing ice at him.

After that, we got dressed and fell asleep on the couch and didn’t wake up until the morning.

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sexcapades.

I decided to tell my mother about my new car first then maybe she could break the news gently to my dad and soften the blow. She demanded I send her pictures immediately and then proceeded to obsess over how cute and perfect for her it was. She’s so crazy.

Right after we hung up, my dad called.

“You decided against the Altima, doll?” he asked.

“Yeah, they didn’t have what I wanted in stock. I just really feel like this car is perfect for my lifestyle. It’ll be good in the winter and the black will easy to be able to keep clean,” I over-explained myself.

“That’s great. I’m not even going to ask how much your insurance premium is, but you work very hard. You deserve it,” he said.

I couldn’t help smiling. My dad is so cute.

On Monday we had a meeting with some potential new investors at work. They wanted to know what direction the company is going in so I gave a really good thirty minute presentation about all the projects I’m working on. Afterwards, they asked a ton of questions so I think they really liked it. They met with Dave and Diana privately after that and I haven’t heard anything since. I hope it went good.

Brady called when he got off work to invite me over and I told him that I would meet him there. I have a car now I don’t need to rely on other people for rides.

When I got there Brady had his little work station set up in the dining room which was kind of annoying because he’s the one who invited me over.

“So how was your day?” I asked, sitting on the dining room table.

“Good. I just have a few things to finish up quickly,” Brady said as he sat back down in front of his laptop. I know he said he’s not a workaholic, but I’m beginning to think otherwise.

I sat there playing on my phone for a few minutes then I decided to go wait for Brady in his room naked. I wasn’t even halfway down the hallway when I heard Brady’s footsteps behind me. He grabbed my wrist and stopped me.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“I’ll wait for you in your room,” I said.

Instead of saying anything back, he pushed me against the wall and started kissing me. His aggressiveness was so hot and I smiled even though we were making out.

“I guess you’re finished with work?” I said, pulling away.

He mumbled something, grabbed my shoulders and steered me into his bedroom. I turned around laughing and pulled him on top of me on the bed. Brady reached down and pulled my shirt over my head then hastily pulled my yoga pants and underwear down at once. He dipped down and ran his tongue down my tummy just below my belly button. He began kissing me everywhere except where I needed him to and it was agonizing. Apparently I’m not the only tease.

Finally he plunged his tongue into me and started working his magic. He persisted on, with much more dominance than normal, until I came hard. He stood up and reached into his night table and held up a foil condom packet proudly. After he slipped it on, he fucked me senseless. But instead of just thrusting in and out, Brady reached down between us and used his thumb to gently rub me. What a sensation.

Afterwards we climbed into bed, exhausted.

“You’re really different than any girl I’ve ever dated,” Brady said out of the blue.

“Mmhm. How so?” I asked, still a bit dazed.

“Just everything about you. Your attitude. The way you carry yourself. The way you talk. It is a quite refreshing change though. I enjoy your company,” he said.

I smiled at how politically correct it all sounded. Only he could make compliments sound like he was reviewing my qualifications for a job.

“Thanks. I think. So what kind of girls do you normally go after?”

Brady bit his lip like he was thinking. “Prissy New England girls.”

I raised my eyebrows but didn’t say anything so he continued.

“High maintenance, spoiled, gossipy… The exact opposite of you. You’re so chill and laidback.”

I have never been called laidback in my life and I don’t know if it’s a compliment or not. Maybe Brady doesn’t really know me after all.

We fell asleep sometime after that and I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. I got back in bed and checked my email, Facebook and Pinterest for a few minutes. Then I felt Brady wrap his arms around me and press me against his body. He was hard. 

Without a word, he started kissing my neck and rubbing my pussy simultaneously. And then he slowly entered me from behind while still kissing my neck. Spooning sex. 

I never thought Brady and I would have such good sexcapades, but I am loving every second of it. 

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mediation of my own.

Kendra and I met for margaritas and chips and queso (not sorry) on Wednesday. We went to a neighborhood I don’t frequent so naturally I had to mix and mingle with the other patrons. We ended up talking to this group of guys and pushing our tables together.

They had come directly after work in the financial district and and all looked dapper in smart suits. The guy I was sitting next to, Cole, was the hottest (not Brady hot, but still hot) and was all over me. He is one of those guys who knows how to work a room. As soon as I told him my name, he used it every opportunity he had.

“Do you want another margarita, Reese?”

“So Reese, do you live around here?”

“Are you going to Lolla, Reese?”

I heard that when you first learn someone’s name you should use it several times to make it stick. Cole was definitely doing just that and it was obvious. I ended up giving him my number even though he’s kind of cocky and I have no interest in dating him. Not when I kind of have Brady who is much more attractive and doesn’t act like God’s gift. Brady hasn’t talked to me at all since Saturday though so whatevs.

When I got to work on Thursday morning, Whitney followed me into my office again.

“Reese,” she started before I even put my stuff down.

“Yes, Whitney?” I said, exasperated. I knew it was going to be something about Amanda/gossip/drama and I just don’t have the time.

“I know you’re unhappy about what’s going on in the office, but you can’t just threaten people because things aren’t going your way,” she said to me like I’m a seven year old child.

“What are you talking about?”

“Amanda told me you called her into your office and threatened her because she’s talking to BJ again.”

I rolled my eyes again. Good grief. Did I ever even mention BJ to Amanda? I’m convinced that they both just pull all this stuff out of their asses. 

“I’m not even going to entertain this,” I said, booting up my computer. I started logging in and pretended she wasn’t still standing there.

“Amanda is really upset. I think you should talk to her and maybe apologize…”

“I’m not fucking apologizing to her,” I said, not looking up from my computer. 

“Reese, I know you’re not used to being in a higher position with a company, but you can’t just do and say whatever you want. There are consequences.” 

Now she was lecturing me.

“Okay,” I said.

I felt her staring at me for a moment before walking out.

I was surprised, but not surprised when Tracey called me and asked me to come to her office later. Amanda and Whitney were already down there when I got there. Seriously? I actually had real work to do.

“Thanks for joining us, Reese,” Tracey said as I slid into the open seat in front of her desk. “So Whitney and Amanda have a few concerns with you and wanted to be able to do so with me present to make sure nothing goes awry.”

Of course. As if I’m some big bad wolf.

“Thanks, Tracey,” Whitney said. She turned to me. “Reese, I tried to discuss things with you this morning before having to get Tracey involved, but you weren’t receptive at all. I was just trying to express to you that Amanda is upset that you threatened her.”

“What was the nature of this threat?” Tracey wanted to know. 

Before I could answer, Amanda piped up. “Aron told me that Reese is upset because BJ and I are on speaking terms again. So Reese called me in her office and said that she would send me back to school with a negative recommendation.”

Tracey didn’t say anything so Amanda went on.

“Because Reese and BJ hooked up, you know? So she is upset that he and I are friends again and they aren’t. I feel like I’ve done a great job this summer so a bad recommendation would be unfair.”

“You have done a great job,” Whitney said.

Tracey gave me an odd look that let me know that she had no idea about the BJ thing. Shit. If they could just lie, I could too right?

“I didn’t hook up with BJ. Everything you just said is a flat out lie,” I said calmly.

Amanda and Whitney looked at each other.

“I don’t know what you guys did, but he seemed to be pretty familiar with with your apartment and where you live,” Whitney said. “And your body….”

“We all know BJ is trouble. Didn’t you two have a falling out earlier this summer, Amanda? In fact, weren’t you in this office before, having a mediation? What’s the common denominator here?” I said, sweetly.

Amanda’s face began to flush and she smiled sheepishly at Tracey.

“I’m offended that y’all would even think I would involve myself with him in that way. That’s insulting to my character and integrity.”

Whitney wouldn’t look at me.

“I have no reason to be threatened by you at all, Amanda. I find it appalling that you would sit here and lie to Tracey when we both know the truth. Honestly, you should be ashamed of yourself. You too, Whitney,” I said.

Neither of them said anything for a moment. Then Amanda said, “You did say you would give me a bad recommendation.”

“Because you were talking shit and gossiping. I think your professors and future employers should know that you can’t handle yourself in a professional work environment.”

Amanda was looking straight ahead avoiding eye contact, but I could see that her face was turning scarlet.

“Sorry,” she said quietly.

“Do you accept her apology, Reese?” Tracey asked.

“Sure.” I wasn’t going to be friends with the girl though.

“Do you have anything to apologize for?” Tracey asked.

Honestly I didn’t, but I also didn’t want to seem like a cunty bitch. “I’m sorry that you thought I was threatening you.”

Amanda accepted my apology and Tracey said we could leave. I bolted out of there before she could ask me to stay and elaborate on the BJ situation. Plus I had Pinterest work to do.

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the intern.

On Monday morning we had a staff meeting to introduce our new bright eyed summer interns. I sat in the back of the conference room Instagramming my shoes (#shoesoftheday #rockstuds) because this had nothing to do with me. Afterwards, I met with Diana and Dave to discuss some details about the warehouse sale. They kept telling me how excited they were about the batik line and how they couldn’t wait to see what else I had in store.

Usually I work through lunch but I decided to go to the break room to make some tea and find a snack. I was standing in front of the vending machine trying to decide if I wanted an iced honey bun or a plain honey bun (honestly, I needed neither) when I heard someone say, “Just take forever why don’t you?”

I turned and standing behind me was one of the new ad team interns with a playful smirk on his face. He was tall and lean with dark hair that needed to be cut, sleepy eyes and an incredible jaw. He was wearing a pair of amazing fitting flat front slacks with a polo tucked in. Something about his look told me that he liked to drink cheap beer, smoke a ton of pot, and get crazy on the weekends. He was actually really effing hot.

“I’m still deciding. You can go ahead of me if you’d like,” I said. 

He stepped in front of me and as if reading my mind, got an iced honey bun. He locked eyes with me as he took a bite. 

“Mmmm. So good,” he said.

“That’s actually what I was going to get,” I told him. 

He held the honey bun out to me. “Want a bite?” 

I shook my head. “I’ll get my own.” 

He was blocking the vending machine so we both just kind of stood there looking at each other.

“What’s your name?” he asked after taking another bite. 

“Reese. What’s yours?” I replied. 

“Brandon. But people call me BJ.” 

“BJ,” I repeated. 

“Yeah. Like blow job.”

Normally an inappropriate comment like this would warrant a scoff and an eye roll, but the way he said it – so suggestively – made my face get hot. And it really pissed me off. 

“Do you know that I’m going to be your boss this summer, Brandon?” I finally revealed. 

He gave me a skeptical look. “How old are you?”

“Old enough.”

Blow Job smirked at me again. “Anything I can get for you, boss lady? Coffee?”

“Non-fat, no foam, Stevia – extra hot chai tea latte topped with a sprinkle of nutmeg. I don’t drink coffee,” I countered. 

“Oh yeah?” he said, smirking. 

“You have six minutes,” I added. 

BJ took a bite of his honey bun without taking his eyes off me.

“You’re out of your mind, Reese. This ain’t The Devil Wears Prada,” he said.

He was so cocky and douchey. Who gave him the right to talk to me – his boss – like this? I was kind of obsessed.

“Yes it is. You’re going to be my slave this summer, Brandon,” I said.

He finished his honey bun while staring me down. “Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah.”

He stared at me carnivorously for a few moments before heading toward the door.

“I hope you’re not a psycho boss, Reese,” BJ said before walking out. 

He has no idea.

After work I stopped by Kendra’s to say hi and to distract myself so I didn’t go home and text Eric. I’d decided that was going to give him a little bit of space. I knew he needed a break from me/my drunk counterpart so I was going to wait for him to contact me.

When I got to Kendra’s, John was there moving some of his things in. The place was in such disarray that it gave me anxiety. I told Kendra I had a lot of work to do a peaced out of there. 

On Tuesday, I got to the office and immediately started replying to emails as usual. I usually spend an hour or so catching up on what I missed/raping Pinterest then I get started on my day. I heard a knock on the door and found BJ standing there with a white Starbucks cup in his hand. 

“Morning, boss lady,” he said, walking to my desk. He sat the cup down and I quickly closed out of my Pinterest browser. “I brought your drink.”

I looked up at him, unsure of what to say. He had that playful smirk on his face. It told me that he was imagining what I looked with my clothes off and it made me blush. I never fucking blush. 

“This is about twenty hours late,” I finally said.

“Sorry about that. It won’t happen again,” BJ said. 

He stayed in my office for a while chatting. I found out that he goes to school at UGA and is in a fraternity, which is obvious. He is studying marketing and advertising – hence the internship and is living with a bunch of his friends in the city this summer. One thing about BJ is that he definitely knows how to talk to women. He says everything so sexually – like he was asking my favorite sex positions and if I wanted to try them out with him. I couldn’t decide if I loved him or hated him. 

After he left, I took a sip of the steaming hot chai goodness. I even tasted the hint of nutmeg. Somehow, this goofy kid had gotten my order exactly right. I was impressed.

I spent the day prepping for the warehouse sale on Saturday, keeping the ad team in check and avoiding hungry looks from BJ. After work, Eric called and invited me to sleep over. I can’t lie, I was relieved to finally hear from him. I packed my bag and changed into lululemon leggings and a v-neck. When we got to his condo, we made pasta for dinner and put in a movie. We didn’t mention Friday night at all.

Eventually, we retreated to his bed. We laid next to each other, on our backs, not saying anything or touching. It was weird and I wondered if Eric was still mad. But he’d invited me over and kissed me hello so that didn’t seen likely. I peeked over at him and he had one hand behind his head and he appeared to be sleeping but I knew he wasn’t. 

I laid there looking out the window for a moment wondering if I should just hop on him. He must’ve wanted to hook up too, right? And then I felt his hand creep across my tummy and in between my legs. He started rubbing me softly through my panties and it was exactly the right spot so I immediately started moaning. His hand quickened and became more urgent. I glanced over and he was still just laying there with his arm behind his head and his eyes closed. If anyone were to walk in, they wouldn’t be able to tell what was happening and that I was about to come hard as fuck. My legs started trembling and Eric – sensing how close I was – moved in quick, rough motions until I squealed with pleasure. And then he rolled over and went to sleep. It was kind of odd but absolutely satisfying.

*also: I will posting the Q&A Friday morning so comment, email, or tweet your last minute questions!

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